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Minor sexual crime on tube - feel upset watch

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    This is actually the second time something like this has happened, but the first time it was a lot worse. Today I was on the tube and this man (around my age) all of a sudden started staring at me intensely - I couldn't look at him but could see from the corner of my eye. He then proceeded to put his hand right under mine on the pole I was holding so he was touching my hand. I moved my finger away so that it wasn't touching his hand, then he placed his finger on mine and started stroking it. All the while looking at me. Luckily I arrived at my stop and ran off the tube. I felt like crying and even now feel upset. I'm not sure if this is because it's the second time it has happened or the fact that I was literally just heading in to the library, going about my day, early in the morning and people do crappy things like this.

    It seems so minor, but I just feel upset. I've reported it to the BTP who are dealing with it. But do you guys think I'm over reacting and need to get over it? Or am I right to feel this way?
    • #2
    #2

    Sorry to hear that You are defo NOT over reacting, he was totally in the wrong!

    Have you thought of maybe carrying a rape alarm if stuff like that happens often? My sis lives in London and she says there are so many creeps :mad: :mad: Then if you dont feel confident to tell people off you can pull it to get others attention. You can also buy stoppared uv spray which is totally legal.

    I hope they catch the **** :mad:
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    I can understand why you're upset. I've been in similar situations and it makes me so uncomfortable.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    This is actually the second time something like this has happened, but the first time it was a lot worse. Today I was on the tube and this man (around my age) all of a sudden started staring at me intensely - I couldn't look at him but could see from the corner of my eye. He then proceeded to put his hand right under mine on the pole I was holding so he was touching my hand. I moved my finger away so that it wasn't touching his hand, then he placed his finger on mine and started stroking it. All the while looking at me. Luckily I arrived at my stop and ran off the tube. I felt like crying and even now feel upset. I'm not sure if this is because it's the second time it has happened or the fact that I was literally just heading in to the library, going about my day, early in the morning and people do crappy things like this.

    It seems so minor, but I just feel upset. I've reported it to the BTP who are dealing with it. But do you guys think I'm over reacting and need to get over it? Or am I right to feel this way?
    I mean that's light compared to people being groped and flat out raped but it's also just creepy. If you feel disturbed then you've every right to report it.
    • #3
    #3

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    This is actually the second time something like this has happened, but the first time it was a lot worse. Today I was on the tube and this man (around my age) all of a sudden started staring at me intensely - I couldn't look at him but could see from the corner of my eye. He then proceeded to put his hand right under mine on the pole I was holding so he was touching my hand. I moved my finger away so that it wasn't touching his hand, then he placed his finger on mine and started stroking it. All the while looking at me. Luckily I arrived at my stop and ran off the tube. I felt like crying and even now feel upset. I'm not sure if this is because it's the second time it has happened or the fact that I was literally just heading in to the library, going about my day, early in the morning and people do crappy things like this.

    It seems so minor, but I just feel upset. I've reported it to the BTP who are dealing with it. But do you guys think I'm over reacting and need to get over it? Or am I right to feel this way?
    Meh. Doesn't seem like that big of a deal to me. Strange and unwanted but is that really a sex crime? Regardless, I think you do need to get over such a small action that really led to no trouble but I can rationalise how that would make you feel uncomfortable.
    • #4
    #4

    I had a man touch my legs and try to finger me on the train. It was absolutely horrible and so sudden, he then wouldn't stop following me. I feel sick thinking about it.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I had a man touch my legs and try to finger me on the train. It was absolutely horrible and so sudden, he then wouldn't stop following me. I feel sick thinking about it.
    That's awful. Did you report it?
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    finger stroking can lead on to hair touching and worse

    report this sex criminal immediately.
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    If there's a next time (and I hope there isn't), tell the creep to f*** off.
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    Its a bit awkward and creepy but is it a sex crime?

    Just get on and live your life, i can understand it made you uncomfortable but I would not worry unless he followed you off the stop.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    This is actually the second time something like this has happened, but the first time it was a lot worse. Today I was on the tube and this man (around my age) all of a sudden started staring at me intensely - I couldn't look at him but could see from the corner of my eye. He then proceeded to put his hand right under mine on the pole I was holding so he was touching my hand. I moved my finger away so that it wasn't touching his hand, then he placed his finger on mine and started stroking it. All the while looking at me. Luckily I arrived at my stop and ran off the tube. I felt like crying and even now feel upset. I'm not sure if this is because it's the second time it has happened or the fact that I was literally just heading in to the library, going about my day, early in the morning and people do crappy things like this.

    It seems so minor, but I just feel upset. I've reported it to the BTP who are dealing with it. But do you guys think I'm over reacting and need to get over it? Or am I right to feel this way?
    next time someone does that, you grab their finger and shove it up their bum

    1.he touches your finger
    2.you touch his finger
    3.quickly grab finger and move his butt area
    4.???????
    5.he fingered himself
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    This is actually the second time something like this has happened, but the first time it was a lot worse. Today I was on the tube and this man (around my age) all of a sudden started staring at me intensely - I couldn't look at him but could see from the corner of my eye. He then proceeded to put his hand right under mine on the pole I was holding so he was touching my hand. I moved my finger away so that it wasn't touching his hand, then he placed his finger on mine and started stroking it. All the while looking at me. Luckily I arrived at my stop and ran off the tube. I felt like crying and even now feel upset. I'm not sure if this is because it's the second time it has happened or the fact that I was literally just heading in to the library, going about my day, early in the morning and people do crappy things like this.

    It seems so minor, but I just feel upset. I've reported it to the BTP who are dealing with it. But do you guys think I'm over reacting and need to get over it? Or am I right to feel this way?
    Overreacted? he invaded your space and its happened before. Perhaps he does it to others, so you were right to report it. Talk to someone about how you feel in the hope you cna get it out of your system and move on.

    Talk to the victim support helpline if you feel that would help . they will listen and empathise wth what you have been through. I wouldnt let it hold you back too much though.
    https://www.victimsupport.org.uk/cri...ual-harassment
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    Some are people are so insensitive -_- It's still unwanted harassment and touching of your person. This is the same for guys and girls and we don't have a "special snowflake agenda".
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    Also there are a few problems with your argument:

    1.) "Intensely staring" at someone on a bus/tube train is a very easy thing to do without realising... or you take "intensely staring" as just a 5 second glance. Are you accusing him of what Tumblrinas call "Stare rape"?

    2.) There have been plenty of times when both males and females have met my hand on the standing pole on a bus. And guess why? BECAUSE THEY WERE OF A SIMILAR HEIGHT AND THEY NEED TO HOLD ON SO THEY DON'T FALL.This is especially true on the tube where the entire ride is bumpy and difficult to keep your balance.

    3.) There have been plenty of times where people have "stroked" my hand when the bus has been very busy and it's inevitable some skin to skin contact is going to happen.

    However, if this guy truly knew exactly what he was doing and he went out of his way to stroke your finger, I apologise. But..

    1.) He stroked your finger, not your genitals/bum.
    2.) He could have been mentally unstable (I've seen people with Down's Syndrome on buses lick their parent's faces).

    While what he did is obviously not appropriate or fair, is it worth reporting and getting upset over? Imo, no.
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    You should have whipped your **** out. Establish dominance
    • #4
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    That's awful. Did you report it?
    I didn't want to think about it again so no. Just moved on pretending nothing happened. But it still keeps me up some nights, makes me feel sick.
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by AshEntropy)
    Also there are a few problems with your argument:

    1.) "Intensely staring" at someone on a bus/tube train is a very easy thing to do without realising... or you take "intensely staring" as just a 5 second glance. Are you accusing him of what Tumblrinas call "Stare rape"?

    2.) There have been plenty of times when both males and females have met my hand on the standing pole on a bus. And guess why? BECAUSE THEY WERE OF A SIMILAR HEIGHT AND THEY NEED TO HOLD ON SO THEY DON'T FALL.This is especially true on the tube where the entire ride is bumpy and difficult to keep your balance.

    3.) There have been plenty of times where people have "stroked" my hand when the bus has been very busy and it's inevitable some skin to skin contact is going to happen.

    However, if this guy truly knew exactly what he was doing and he went out of his way to stroke your finger, I apologise. But..

    1.) He stroked your finger, not your genitals/bum.
    2.) He could have been mentally unstable (I've seen people with Down's Syndrome on buses lick their parent's faces).

    While what he did is obviously not appropriate or fair, is it worth reporting and getting upset over? Imo, no.
    Genuinely one of the most stupid things I've ever read on TSR. Have a gold star. :rolleyes:

    Your use of the word "Tumblrina" says it all (and I'm right wing, pro mens rights and praying fervently Trump wins in the election tonight). Some Internet edgelord who thinks that playing down serious stuff like inappropriate touching on the Tube wins him brownie points. You're as bad as the kind of liberals you clearly hate who say that their obviously criminal kids "dindu nuffin" or had mental issues or some bullcrap.

    Have a ****ing seat and don't write retarded posts like this on serious topics again.

    :facepalm:
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    (Original post by Nirvana1989-1994)
    If there's a next time (and I hope there isn't), tell the creep to f*** off.
    Well said!

    Lots of future supreme gentlemen ITT. :rolleyes:
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Genuinely one of the most stupid things I've ever read on TSR. Have a gold star. :rolleyes:

    Your use of the word "Tumblrina" says it all (and I'm right wing, pro mens rights and praying fervently Trump wins in the election tonight). Some Internet edgelord who thinks that playing down serious stuff like inappropriate touching on the Tube wins him brownie points. You're as bad as the kind of liberals you clearly hate who say that their obviously criminal kids "dindu nuffin" or had mental issues or some bullcrap.

    Have a ****ing seat and don't write retarded posts like this on serious topics again.

    :facepalm:
    You tried
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    You can't control how you feel so don't feel bad for feeling that way.
    I think you need to try not to think about it tbh. As it wasn't a huge deal (and I say this in the kindest way possible-I understand you're upset) I think that distracting yourself for a while should do the trick. Next time someone does this to you (if they do, hopefully not), call them out and embarrass them in front of everyone on the carriage. It'll make you feel a lot better.
 
 
 
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