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Colleague is making me feel uncomfortable watch

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    Hi!

    So I've started a new job a few weeks ago and I absolutely love it! However, there is a particular colleague who is making me feel really anxious and uncomfortable. He works in a different class to me and sometimes I have to go to that As a class cover supervisor (I work as a supply teacher).

    At first he was just chatty- I caught him looking a few times but thought nothing of it. On my first day however, he asked me in front of 6 other colleagues really loudly if I had a boyfriend. I felt so embarrassed in front of everyone and I knew what he was getting at so I stupidly lied and said "yes".

    Anyway, I only saw him on my breaks in the staff room for the next few weeks and everything seemed ok! Then I took two weeks off work on leave... he had found me on tinder and not only liked me but superliked me! 😨 I feel a weirded out around him anyway because whenever he sees me he runs over to me and stops and asks lots of questions.

    So before I was back in work, over the weekend, I saw that he had added me on Facebook. He does not know my surname and nor does anyone else because I don't have a name tag and the school I am in everyone refers to your first names including the kids. Also, we have 0 mutual friends. I was really creeped out and angry at this point and made a tweet saying how it's strange when people you don't know add your full name or have mutual friends add you on Facebook. He has since retracted his friend request and I'm worried he has maybe looked me up on Twitter as well somehow! Oh another thing: my Facebook and Twitter names are my middle names not surname so no idea how he has found me!

    He stopped me again in the corridor today and I felt so so awkward! I was in another job last week and he kept asking where about it was and I feel so uncomfortable! Everyone knows his mum as well and loves her. But- am I being harassed? If so how do I deal with it?

    Sorry it's long- thank you!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hi!

    So I've started a new job a few weeks ago and I absolutely love it! However, there is a particular colleague who is making me feel really anxious and uncomfortable. He works in a different class to me and sometimes I have to go to that As a class cover supervisor (I work as a supply teacher).

    At first he was just chatty- I caught him looking a few times but thought nothing of it. On my first day however, he asked me in front of 6 other colleagues really loudly if I had a boyfriend. I felt so embarrassed in front of everyone and I knew what he was getting at so I stupidly lied and said "yes".

    Anyway, I only saw him on my breaks in the staff room for the next few weeks and everything seemed ok! Then I took two weeks off work on leave... he had found me on tinder and not only liked me but superliked me! 😨 I feel a weirded out around him anyway because whenever he sees me he runs over to me and stops and asks lots of questions.

    So before I was back in work, over the weekend, I saw that he had added me on Facebook. He does not know my surname and nor does anyone else because I don't have a name tag and the school I am in everyone refers to your first names including the kids. Also, we have 0 mutual friends. I was really creeped out and angry at this point and made a tweet saying how it's strange when people you don't know add your full name or have mutual friends add you on Facebook. He has since retracted his friend request and I'm worried he has maybe looked me up on Twitter as well somehow! Oh another thing: my Facebook and Twitter names are my middle names not surname so no idea how he has found me!

    He stopped me again in the corridor today and I felt so so awkward! I was in another job last week and he kept asking where about it was and I feel so uncomfortable! Everyone knows his mum as well and loves her. But- am I being harassed? If so how do I deal with it?

    Sorry it's long- thank you!
    There's a chance that he likes you or he's just that kind of a person (the weird one). There are some annoying people you meet in your life and all you should do is just ignore them. However, if he's not a retard, he's into you. Does he make a lot of eye contact with you or trying to flirt with you in other ways? Touching you, teasing you, etc? You should observe his behavior towards your co workers and if you realize that he's different when you are around, it makes it quite self-explanatory.

    But either way, if you don't like him at all, you should openly ask what is going on and let him know that you don't want to form any relationship with him, other than you have through your jobs.

    Also, try not to be kind with him, let him realize that you ignore him. If nothing works, you can even be a jerk around him, so he'll probably get back. Didn't you make some move that would let him suggest that you like him? I think he thinks that.
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    (Original post by lilly19)
    There's a chance that he likes you or he's just that kind of a person (the weird one). There are some annoying people you meet in your life and all you should do is just ignore them. However, if he's not a retard, he's into you. Does he make a lot of eye contact with you or trying to flirt with you in other ways? Touching you, teasing you, etc? You should observe his behavior towards your co workers and if you realize that he's different when you are around, it makes it quite self-explanatory.

    But either way, if you don't like him at all, you should openly ask what is going on and let him know that you don't want to form any relationship with him, other than you have through your jobs.

    Also, try not to be kind with him, let him realize that you ignore him. If nothing works, you can even be a jerk around him, so he'll probably get back. Didn't you make some move that would let him suggest that you like him? I think he thinks that.
    Hi Lily,

    Thanks for your reply! If he tries anything again I think I am going to ask if I can have a word and take him to one side and tell him I feel a little uncomfortable with his behaviour! He retracted his friend request so I can't even message him over it- will have to be face to face!

    I haven't done anything to suggest that I like him. I talked to him on the first day, before he asked me if I had a boyfriend. I think it's a little bit rude to ask someone on their first day of work in front of other colleagues if you have a boyfriend don't you?

    Thanks!
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    If you're not interested in him then you could go to your manager and explain the situation. However before that, do try to get him to leave you alone. I actually know how difficult that is since I'm in a similar situation myself. Best thing to do is friend zone him as much as you can. Give him one-word answers to his questions and dont be nice enough to ask him any questions about himself. Also you can block him on social media so that he can't see any of your posts.

    Hope that helps my darling, and good luck!
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    (Original post by DabThruALevels)
    If you're not interested in him then you could go to your manager and explain the situation. However before that, do try to get him to leave you alone. I actually know how difficult that is since I'm in a similar situation myself. Best thing to do is friend zone him as much as you can. Give him one-word answers to his questions and dont be nice enough to ask him any questions about himself. Also you can block him on social media so that he can't see any of your posts.

    Hope that helps my darling, and good luck!
    Yeah everyone seems to think trying to handle it myself is better- I don't want to get him in trouble and seem like I'm exaggerating but people do stalk! I just feel really uneasy around him! Sounds weird but I feel like he's mentally undressing me- does that make sense? I hope you sort your situation out as well lovely! Thank you! Xx
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Yeah everyone seems to think trying to handle it myself is better- I don't want to get him in trouble and seem like I'm exaggerating but people do stalk! I just feel really uneasy around him! Sounds weird but I feel like he's mentally undressing me- does that make sense? I hope you sort your situation out as well lovely! Thank you! Xx
    Yeah i get what you mean. If you're not interested in him and feel like you're being harassed, at least privatise your accounts online so you have some space from the guy. And maybe he'll get the idea and back off in real life too. Oh and the mentally undressing thing. Yeah i actually felt the same way when this guy was interested in me and had that look on his face. Makes you wonder whats going on in that head of theirs and what nonsense they're dreaming about!

    Anyway, i hope things get better for you, well for both of us. Send us an update if anything else happens! Xx
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    hey are you attractive? I would say he is probably stalking you and so you should make all your tweets protected and also make your facebook invisible instagram private. I have experience with stalking you have to spell out you are not interested more loudly
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    He probably just thinks your really pretty, I guess take it as a compliment but I understand why you're aggrivated by the constant nagging you feel he is doing. Maybe just tell him like btw I know what your trying to do stop. Telling your manager might be a bit idk, mean. But I am not in the situtation so I am not entirely sure but, gd luck
 
 
 
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