Okay so I can't breathe.
I'm currently struggling to inhale like a regular being.
After spending my entire morning laughing.
(And I mean from around 7am-12pm, in hysterical fits to the point where you can no longer feel your stomach or stand up straight.) .. my entire afternoon crying.
(And I mean to the point where you can no longer see what's ahead of you or feel your eyes.) I have now officially run out of tissues as well as emotions + I don't know what to do with myself.
I totally don't want to leave the house to buy some bc I'm a state anyway + it's ever so cold.
So I'm sat here posting this cause that's what I always do when I feel helpless.
I'm so tremendously upset, I've just finished having my 8th or 9th shower of the day bc showers usually help me feel a bit better but I'm not feeling better at all, just even colder + I feel so incredibly sad + terrible.
I feel so terrible, as I'm sure millions of others do too + I'm so sorry for everyone + it's terrible + everything is terrible. Really, truly terrible + I absolutely hate everything bc well, I just do bc its terrible.
No one likes discussing politics bc it's way too intense of a topic so all I've been able to do in an attempt to alleviate my sorrow is text a few sentences to a few friends.
But that meant that some people received wild messages expressing amusement whilst others got messages filled with tears + I just needed to compile everything all somewhere.
+ no one has replied to them anyway bar my Literature group.
Oh + my sibling has been comforting me for over 7 hours + apparently doesn't know what to do anymore so she's resorted to staring at me whilst I pace up + down the house muttering gibberish.
I literally don't even know what I'm saying anymore.
Nor do I know the precise reasons behind my tears any longer.
Have I mentioned that I've run out of tissues.
Maybe this should've been placed in advice in everyday issues.
I honestly don't understand why the world is so terrible.
I want to be sheltered from all the bad.
Can someone pls, pls shelter me.
I would like to count my pennies in peace.
I just.. strongly dislike earth.
Why can't people be nice.
Not even wholly nice, just semi-nice would do.
Why can't everyone be semi-nice.
Why can't everyone be human.
Why is being human apparently such a difficult trait to hold.
Life would be so much easier + happier.
Dear God, I really can't take it.