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Why do guys suddenly avoid you?

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    I got along really well with a guy but since we spoke through text for the first time, he seems to be avoiding me. I feel like he slyly looks at me but quickly looks away and doesnt make eye contact! Also, I feel like he is trying to make me jealous by getting too close to another girl - but then again he is normally confident with other girls so is it just me thats getting hurt seeing him so close to someone else, or is he actually trying to make me jealous? I'm really not sure what to think... I'm not the kind of girl someone would fall head over heels for but this is really getting to me!

    Please advise
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    As a guy myself, I advise it's best not to try and understand us. We do weird things that make sense only to ourselves.
    #1

    I relate to some of the weird crap guys do. I spoke to one 24/7 and after after we met up...radio silence. We met up as friends and both had an awesome time so unless im misunderstanding the situation...i'm stumped. He still likes my photos and watches my story and stuff. :confused:
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    (Original post by NoPunInThisName)
    As a guy myself, I advise it's best not to try and understand us. We do weird things that make sense only to ourselves.


    If you were to act like that, what would the reason be?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I relate to some of the weird crap guys do. I spoke to one 24/7 and after after we met up...radio silence. We met up as friends and both had an awesome time so unless im misunderstanding the situation...i'm stumped. He still likes my photos and watches my story and stuff. :confused:
    Guess we will never understand guys!
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    (Original post by Siraya)
    If you were to act like that, what would the reason be?
    Well personally, I've changed my tune with women because sometimes I felt too proud to act like an extrovert in the real world, it's so easy to be someone else behind a keyboard.

    I was naive and my behaviour baffled even myself, these days I just behave how I am naturally.
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    Doll I'm going to be brutally honest here, but the answer is in your last sentence " I'm not the kind of girl someone would fall head over heels for". You don't value yourself and I was exactly the same. Up until last year I had no real inkling to my own self value. My self esteem was virtually non existent and I didn't realize how much it bullying from secondary school still affected me . I let someone push and treat me badly because I thought I didn't deserve anything better.I thought he was so wonderful because I didn't expect boys to actually be nice to girls.

    Boys want girls they deem to be of high value. You ARE worthy. You are good enough but you just need to actually be able to see that first. Love yourself first and the rest WILL follow. Most people actually have a huge problem with that and it sounds so simplistic- but i didn't love myself and it showed. I wasn't confident in myself. You don't have to be the hottest girl in the room, but you have to know you are a woman of high value- but you have to work on yourself. I had the guy I like literally tickling and putting his hands all over another girl in front of me, because he knew it would get to me. Real men do NOT play mind games.

    Do you really want someone who is just going to be a flake and play with your emotions? You don't deserve that.

    The books I honestly would recommend that you start reading now:

    Love yourself like your life depends on it by Kamal Ravikant
    F*CK Him! - Nice Girls Always Finish Single - Brian Keephimattracted
    Never Chase Men Again-Bruce Bryans

    Yes the dating books sound silly but they teach one main thing: Know your value.
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    (Original post by Lemons1990)
    Doll I'm going to be brutally honest here, but the answer is in your last sentence " I'm not the kind of girl someone would fall head over heels for". You don't value yourself and I was exactly the same. Up until last year I had no real inkling to my own self value. My self esteem was virtually non existent and I didn't realize how much it bullying from secondary school still affected me . I let someone push and treat me badly because I thought I didn't deserve anything better.I thought he was so wonderful because I didn't expect boys to actually be nice to girls.

    Boys want girls they deem to be of high value. You ARE worthy. You are good enough but you just need to actually be able to see that first. Love yourself first and the rest WILL follow. Most people actually have a huge problem with that and it sounds so simplistic- but i didn't love myself and it showed. I wasn't confident in myself. You don't have to be the hottest girl in the room, but you have to know you are a woman of high value- but you have to work on yourself. I had the guy I like literally tickling and putting his hands all over another girl in front of me, because he knew it would get to me. Real men do NOT play mind games.

    Do you really want someone who is just going to be a flake and play with your emotions? You don't deserve that.

    The books I honestly would recommend that you start reading now:

    Love yourself like your life depends on it by Kamal Ravikant
    F*CK Him! - Nice Girls Always Finish Single - Brian Keephimattracted
    Never Chase Men Again-Bruce Bryans

    Yes the dating books sound silly but they teach one main thing: Know your value.

    Thank you so much!!! This is exactly what I needed right now. I literally have NO self esteem. I have NO confidence in myself. That's why I think I'm just overthinking because nobody will ever like me. I really need to work on building up my self esteem and this really really helped!
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    (Original post by Siraya)
    Thank you so much!!! This is exactly what I needed right now. I literally have NO self esteem. I have NO confidence in myself. That's why I think I'm just overthinking because nobody will ever like me. I really need to work on building up my self esteem and this really really helped!
    I'm glad it did I literally learnt by the trial of fire, and had my heartbroken twice in the process. but there is something that only pain can teach us. I held a very naive view and I had no expericence with boys even at the age of 24. xD I promised myself that I will never let another boy treat me the way H did and he will be my never again. There is a difference in needing a man and wanting a man. Play songs that empower you. Do things that make you feel good about yourself- go for a massage. Joining a gym and going to cross fit classes really helped me- small things like actually being able to run 5km made me feel strong.

    I had this by Demi Lovato on repeat today:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NyQRQ0krslM

    I would also suggest counselling inorder to understand the root cause of where your feelings stem from.
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    (Original post by Siraya)
    Thank you so much!!! This is exactly what I needed right now. I literally have NO self esteem. I have NO confidence in myself. That's why I think I'm just overthinking because nobody will ever like me. I really need to work on building up my self esteem and this really really helped!


    please don't take that advice or read those books

    you'll probably turn out to be one of those girls who love themselves too much and think they deserve a price charming/male model ..who also moonlights as a stockbroker in between shoots

    there's far too many of these girls already in the UK ... don't add to them

    if you really need some confidence or self esteem just open a dating profile on a well known dating website and you'll get all the confidence and self esteem you need as males will flock to you and tell you're beautiful and gorgeous and lovely ...etc etc
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    (Original post by ANM775)
    please don't take that advice or read those books

    you'll probably turn out to be one of those girls who love themselves too much and think they deserve a price charming/male model ..who also moonlights as a stockbroker in between shoots

    there's far too many of these girls already in the UK ... don't add to them

    if you really need some confidence or self esteem just open a dating profile on a well known dating website and you'll get all the confidence and self esteem you need as males will flock to you and tell you're beautiful and gorgeous and lovely ...etc etc
    You are correct but I think there is a difference between having set standards where it's not unreasonable to expect a man to actually treat you with the kindness that you deserve, to girls who do have highly unrealistic expectations and criteria of what their ideal partner must have .

    The only thing i see is that unless the OP addresses the underlying issues of her self esteem problems- she will look to men for external validation. Girls who have low self esteem are more eager to please and vulnerable to a certain extent because they just want to be loved, but unless you actually love yourself they will always be looking for someone to complete them. She could be told that she was beautiful but would she really believe it? I just think it should come from her first.
 
 
 
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Updated: November 13, 2016
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