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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    On a friendship site
    So you went looking for friendship and it's turned into more? Have you met him in person yet?
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    I wouldn't be worried at all. Most of my friends are male and I have haven't had anything go on with any of them. I do have some female friend but all of my close friends are male. Try not to worry and just see how the relationship progresses
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    On a friendship site

    Hmmm, that's what i thought. It's not necessarily a bad thing, but based on the fact that barely any of his friends are male and some of his friends live in other countries etc, i'd say he probably struggles with real social situations - it sounds like he makes the majority of his friendships online.
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    Most of my friends are girls. Quite a few of them yes were girls I liked but then for one reason or another (they don't like me like that, they do and we didn't both know (sigh), they have a boyfriend etc) we don't go out. In addition, I have no interest in watching the rugby and getting drunk etc so if he's a bit like that that could be the reason.
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    #1

    So to the guys that have lots of female friends, do you have a girlfriend?
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    I do at the moment and have had a fair few down the years but there've also been some fair sized gaps when I've been single.

    I can relate to the males posting about not just wanting to do all the typical male stuff.
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    I don't, no.
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    You cannot really judge him until you have met him in real life, assuming you haven't? Does it really matter if he has a lot of female friends? He is either a Casanova or just prefers the company of women to men, I personally prefer the company of men normally, it is just a matter of choice.

    If you feel intimated by the number of female friends, either ask him, or just accept it and move on.
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    does he have sisters?

    i grew up with two brothers and no female cousins or anything, and my friendly are mainly male. i have about 4/5 close female friends and the rest are male, they arent ex-boyfriends or ex-crushes, theyre just friends. i find it easier to get along with guys, like if i meet someone new, if theyre female i sometimes struggle with conversation whereas im a lot more relaxed around boys.

    so maybe thats why he has, maybe he just prefers female company. i would read too much into it
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    What does it means when a man (he's 27) has vastly more female friends than male?
    That he gets on better with women than men. Most of my friends are female, because most typical 'guy' conversations bore me - I'm not that interested in cars or football. Guys aren't as good, generally, at communicating, and there's often a sense of one-upmanship that I don't really want in a friendship. Having said that, at uni I met quite a few guys who I could hold a decent conversation with, so I have a reasonable number of male friends now. But still the majority would be female.

    It's well documented that many guys talk in 'report speak', basically a conversation starts because someone's done something funny/extreme and reports it, and everyone is amazed, maybe even discusses it briefly, before the conversation moves on.

    Sure, he may fancy some of them. It's more common for men to fancy their female friends than vice versa (women seem to have more differentiated potential-boyfriend and friend categories). But it's not necessarily true. I have fancied quite a few of my female friends in the past, but I don't fancy any at the moment (other than my girlfriend :love: ). As a little aside too, while I've fancied far more of my female friends than randomers, almost every relationship I've had has been when I've met someone and started going out with them immediately. I'd say any guy is generally far more likely to cheat with someone who's not a friend than a female friend.

    In short, guys are girls tend to communicate differently, so if you're a guy who happens to prefer communicating more in the way that girls do, you tend to have more female friends. While he may fancy some of them, having quite a few friends doesn't mean that, and moreover, he's with you, so isn't about to try it on with them. It really shouldn't be a barrier or a red flag, IMHO, it just means he gets on better with girls.
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    All my mates (bar two) are boys, and I met them all in real life. I've never fancied any of my three closest guy mates, but then we've all been mates for years so a relationship would be out of the question. I wouldn't feel so much insecure as slightly weirded out by all these females he's trying to meet online (I assume so anyway, correct me if I'm wrong). It just whiffs slightly of desperation.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So to the guys that have lots of female friends, do you have a girlfriend?
    Why is that relevant? Relationships rarely last forever, and the fact he's with you now suggests he's in one of those single periods, well was before meeting you. Or still is if you haven't took it to that level.

    Anyway, it's a fact that some guys prefer to build a relationship from a friendship. I wouldn't have it any other way. I'm picky and like to know what I'm getting, so getting to know them first is important. It does sound like he's not very good in social situations, which also makes it more difficult to just get with a random.

    People you meet online generally don't message you with the idea of "I want a relationship with you", they get to know you first, even if they have made the decision that you meet the basic requirements for a relationship based on your profile data. If nothing happens then often that person remains a friend. A lot of people stop talking to people when they fail to get anywhere with someone, but people who see it as a friendship opportunity are usually more caring.

    If his friends make you jealous, then he's not the one for you, but as long as he's not trying to get with them (leading to you having competition if you're not together yet) then there should be no issue.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So to the guys that have lots of female friends, do you have a girlfriend?
    Yes. I'm sure occasionally she might feel a bit strange about how close I am to some of them, but I try to tone it down a little now I'm attached. Having a girlfriend doesn't affect my choice of friends though.
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    Some people would say it is indication of his sexuality. Some follow the train of thought that a person feels a lot more comfortable around those they see as essentially similar, and that we instinctively see the other gender as "different" and primarily in the context of lovin'.

    I don't know what I think. I know it feels more natural for me, as a straight man, to have friends that are men. We're all different though. Only you know this guy. You will understand him better over time. Other than that, you could try and get him to talk about the subject, with something unintimidating like "You seem very popular with the ladies..."
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    Most of my friends have been girls, and I've not fancied any of them - except one, who's now my girlfriend.
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    I'd say 99% of my mates are male... And I have a loving relationship. Just because he is friends with all these woman- and who knows, he may have fancied all of them- doesn't mean that he doesn't like you NOW. That is what is important. If you are really worried about this then just talk to him about it. It won'e make you sound jealous if you just talk about it... When you start demanding he doesn't see his female friends... thats when you come over jealous... Just trust his feelings and talk to him about it. If you still feel bad then decide what is to be done. You are completely justified in your feelings, but you have to remember that he is too!

    Good luck m'dear!
    xxx
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    I have a girlfriend, and pretty much all my friends are girls, I find them much easier to get on with, (to stereotype horrendously) I would much prefer a little *****ing to oversized egos . The girls I know are just amazing people, and I have a laugh with them, moreso than with guys I find. They're great, but I'd not ever consider cheating, and it definitely doesn't mean that I fancy the pants off them.

    EDIT: Quoted for striking similarity with my experiences.
    (Original post by Fluent in Lies)
    Most of my friends have been girls, and I've not fancied any of them - except one, who's now my girlfriend.
    I'd say just go with it
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Do you guys think I should talk to him about this? How would I approach the subject without sounding overly insecure or jealous?

    BTW am I justified in feeling this way?
    What do you expect the outcome of the conversation to be? Him dropping all his female friends just because your insecure and paranoid?

    Most of my friends at the moment are girls, and I have a long-term girlfriend, its a non-issue for us, as well with other guys like me who have many girl friends.

    My girlfriend has loads of guy friends, actually thinking about it that majority 90% of them are guys, 2 she has been out with or fancied at some stage, however it doesnt bother me in the slightest, I got to know them, I hang around with them and go out with them and get drunk. Its made our relationship stronger. The same goes with her and my girl friends.
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    I was thinking about this with my bf....hes got a lot of female friends...but I realised I have a lot of male friends. I see them as purely friends so I thought why should I doubt him?

    Maybe see how he acts around his female friends? E.g. is he flirty with them, or just being a friend
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    Don't read too much into it.

    I've always got on well with women, more so than men because as one of the above posters mentioned, I don't really give a toss about cars or footy.

    Have I fancied female friends in the past? Yes, of course, but that doesn't mean I have to jump their bones as soon as I think it. You are never going to keep this man clear of females he likes the look of, whether they're his friends or not. In fact, it's probably harder to start a sexual relationship with a friend than it is a stranger, so you'd actually be better off if 99% of the women he met were already branded as friends anyway

    As for whether it means he's somehow less attractive because he's surrounded by them and doesn't do anything. Really, get over yourself. Have you considered that he just doesn't want to do anything? Does he have to immediately jump into the bed of every woman who shows him interest? You make it sound like he obviously has had no chances before you!

    I'm sure he'd be delighted to hear that you consider the only reason he hasn't bedded his friends is because they won't let him.

    That spite aside :p: , really you have nothing to worry about.
 
 
 
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