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Going to the same uni as a friend. Good or Bad?

I recently found out a mate of mine is going to uni (he's on holiday, so i couldnt contact him till now). Naturally it was a nice thing to know. But suddenly ive been having these bad thoughts lol. Im now worried i'll be limitted because of it, being slightly more reluctant to make new friends i guess. I know this will probably make me sound selfish, but i really aint.

What do you reckon? Dont mean to sound cruel, but do you reckon i should kinda stay away, till later on?

I'd like to hear your opinions :smile:

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Reply 1

cpj1987

Don't avoid your friend completely, no, but make sure that you don't end up spending all of your time with him.
I think you'll find it more difficult to make new friends but not impossible, as long as you don't slip into the mentality that you've already got a friend there - don't spend too much time with him, and if people invite you out, go with them and without him, and you should be fine. It's likely he'll try and do the same.

Reply 2

~Kirsty~

It depends on how close you are now, ie do you text/talk a lot, and its possible he may be living at the opposite end of the city to you.

I do think its important you don't spend all your time with him. Its likely you'll meet new and different friends especially if your doing different courses.

Reply 3

prettygreeneyes99

It can be a bad thing... but you may both just want hang around with people who you live with at first, and then later maybe people on your course... just try not to make plans with seeing your friend too much during the first week or two, so unless your friend gives you the impression that you will be hanging around together at uni then just play it by ear :smile:

Reply 4

Just some guy

Uni is a big place. Don't make an effort to contact him for fresher's week and forge new friendships. When that's all sorted out meet up with him and leech his freinds as well :p:

...ok, befriend, not leech. You know what I mean.

Reply 5

helenll

I'm going to the same uni and same course as my friend! I think it'll be fine, uni is huuuge and it'll be good because you'll know someone there to make it easier for you when you're homesick etc. Also you'll both make different sets of friends ( especially if you're in different halls, join different societies) and then it'll help you to meet even more new people through them!

Reply 6

king_jarvis

When to Uni with my cousin and a friend from school and college plus about 10-15 people who I went to college with were already there.

Lived next door to my cousin in first year 2 mins away in second and shared a house with him in the third. The guy form school is now my best friend and now to the bit you want to know it did not hurt me in any way I made new friends in every year and have had a great three years at Uni.

P.S just make sure you make friends nice and early and don't hang out with each other in your rooms in the first week or two because that is when most friendships are made. So basically just go on a mad one in freshers week and you will be fine. A plus point about your friends going as well is that you make friends with your flat mates and your friend does the same then you have two groups of friends available without even stepping out of your flat.

All the best

Reply 7

Goodkat

Same thing for me and we are doing the same course :rolleyes:

. I haven't quite decided what to do with it, I figure I will chat to him in lectures but just not hang around with him out of lectures for a while. Will be fine if you just play it by ear :wink:

I'm social anyway so I just intend to make plenty new friends, I'm sure it will work out. At least I will have someone to copy notes off on those hangover morning lectures eh :p:

Reply 8

Cushti

There'll be so many new people there, chances are you won't see him often anyway. You should maybe agree to meet him for coffee or something a couple of weeks into the term, so he doesn't think you're avoiding him.

Having said that, all of my friends are going to different unis, and personally I think it's better that way.

Reply 9

prettygreeneyes99

Ahh all this talk of freshers week is making me miss my freshers week so much! I loved living somewhere new and making new friends, was so much fun!

Reply 10

castroneves

Half of my further maths class from college ended up going to the same uni as me. Ended up seeing these people far less in term time than holidays, despite in term time them living no more than 5 mins walk away, whereas at home in somerset they are anything up to an hours drive away.

So as long as you dont let it limit you it shouldn't.

Reply 11

Fleece

It's not good OR bad. It's just what it is - not a big deal.

I went to the same uni as one of my best mates from home - I hardly saw him. Unless you're on the same course and living in the same halls then I doubt you'll find it much of a problem.

Reply 12

Anonymous #2

By bad thoughts do you mean you're thinking of having sexual intercourse with him?

Reply 13

ßlαcksωαn

Are you sure he's a "friend"?
I would have loved all my mates to go to my uni! :frown:

Reply 14

Rainygal

I'm going to the same uni as my sister which is obviously slightly different, but I'd just echo the people above me and say try to keep your distance at frst to allow you both to make new friends, but don't underestimate the fact that having a friend close by could turn out to be reassuring when you're feeling homesick etc

Reply 15

thePhantom

Around 15/20 people from my year at sixth form went to my uni the same year I did, it was insane the amount of people I know before I'd started. Some of these people were really good mates, I've known them and been in the same class at high school since I was 13 ...

It's not been a bad thing at all, I wasn't living in halls with most of them, and It was great because in my first year, I met people from my flat/halls, and then my course and societies, and then had my close friends from home and all the people I met through them ...

Also - I've lived in a house of 5 in our second year, where 4 of us have as I've said known each other since we were teens ... This wasn't because we didnt go out and meet other people, it's because we're genuinely good mates, and know each other really well and knew we would be able to live with each other. It worked out much better than a lot of other uni houses where people meet people and agree to move in and then find out the hard way during their second year that they dont get on ...

Just don't cling to them, go out and meet all the people around you, and see what happens!

Reply 16

notsoperfect

i'm going to uni with quite a few people i know (one is in my halls, a couple of others are in halls together) and i think it will only be a good thing. i'll probably avoid seeing them for a few days, but definitely meet up once i've got to know other people. i think it's a good thing, as you get to meet their friends, and they get to meet yours.

Reply 17

Danielle89

Im in the same flat/hall as my best mate as of september and sharing with 6 others too so im not worrying about it plus she's not on my course.

Reply 18

Nudlz

im in the same posistion. me and my friend are going to the same uni. we went to the same school and be chance weve both ended up at De monfort. were on the same course and we were going to live togther but that bit fel;l through. i think we'll still be mates but now we wont be living togther were going to see each other in classes only, which i think is better because we can make are own freinds and we wont be sticking to each to each other to support. i think it helps having a familar face to go to uni with but its best if you ( we) go our own ways. plus if you stick to your freind you might ( we might) miss out on making new budhas :smile:

Reply 19

Rooftopcowboy

id say it'd be best to keep your distance for the first few weeks (even go as far as telling the friend you are going to do this!) as people are going to find it hard to get to know you individually if your in a 'duo' with lots of in-jokes going on etc. Ie people will make less of an effort than if you look more lonely! if that makes sense.