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Boyfriend at Reading
I wasn't sure where to post this, so sorry if it's the wrong place!
Basically my boyfriend has gone to the Reading festival this year, and although I trust him and everything, something's just slightly niggling at me because of the "festival culture". I haven't been to a festival before, but all my friends are telling me that at festivals everyone just basically wants to enjoy the music, but also get drunk and get with other people.
Is this the sort of thing that happens at festivals? Or are my friends just exaggerating?
Basically my boyfriend has gone to the Reading festival this year, and although I trust him and everything, something's just slightly niggling at me because of the "festival culture". I haven't been to a festival before, but all my friends are telling me that at festivals everyone just basically wants to enjoy the music, but also get drunk and get with other people.
Is this the sort of thing that happens at festivals? Or are my friends just exaggerating?
Scroll to see replies
Reply 1
depends on the festival really, what you are describing is typical of Glastonbury if that makes you feel better, But i don't know for others 
Reply 2
Hmm well Ive only heard that people tend to get drunk, havent really heard anything about it being a 'shagfest' as such lol. But I wouldnt worry about having little niggles, most of us get them when boyfriends/girlfriends go off to places like this 
Reply 3
My boyfriend is at Leeds and I know exactly how you feel.
People can tell you are you being silly and paranoid but it's natural to feel uneasy. I totally trust my boyfriend but I don't trust the people he has gone with. They are childish, irresponsible and don't care about anyone else's feelings. One of them is basically a 'man slag' and is a serial cheater and I don't think he cares whether his best mate has a girlfriend or not. When they are out together it is inevitable that they will end up with a group of girls and I admit, I'm jealous. I don't want these other girls having a great time with MY boyfriend, flirting with him all weekend. I'm just worried he'll get too drunk or stoned and he might get taken advantage off. His phone has run out of battery and it costs too much to recharge so I won't be hearing from him until Monday. I'm not sure whether this is a good or bad thing.
People can tell you are you being silly and paranoid but it's natural to feel uneasy. I totally trust my boyfriend but I don't trust the people he has gone with. They are childish, irresponsible and don't care about anyone else's feelings. One of them is basically a 'man slag' and is a serial cheater and I don't think he cares whether his best mate has a girlfriend or not. When they are out together it is inevitable that they will end up with a group of girls and I admit, I'm jealous. I don't want these other girls having a great time with MY boyfriend, flirting with him all weekend. I'm just worried he'll get too drunk or stoned and he might get taken advantage off. His phone has run out of battery and it costs too much to recharge so I won't be hearing from him until Monday. I'm not sure whether this is a good or bad thing.
Reply 4
Not everyone who goes to a festival, gets drunk or gets laid, some people generally go for the enjoyment of music.
Reply 5
I'm not at Reading this year, but I've been several times before, and I wouldn't say everyone goes and starts getting with each other.
I mean, sure, it happens, especially when drink's involved, but I wouldn't say it's any worse than a typical night out, if that helps.
I mean, sure, it happens, especially when drink's involved, but I wouldn't say it's any worse than a typical night out, if that helps.
Reply 6
emzay
OP
Thanks for the replies.
CheesyBeans - That's pretty much what it's like for me, although his friends aren't that bad! Just pretty much a take what's on offer type of thing though, and I'm pretty sure they'd egg him on to do something just for a "laugh". Poor you not being able to speak to him - luckily mine's taken 2 phones, and has promised to ring me twice a day
CheesyBeans - That's pretty much what it's like for me, although his friends aren't that bad! Just pretty much a take what's on offer type of thing though, and I'm pretty sure they'd egg him on to do something just for a "laugh". Poor you not being able to speak to him - luckily mine's taken 2 phones, and has promised to ring me twice a day
Reply 7
Rock Fan
Not everyone who goes to a festival, gets drunk or gets laid, some people generally go for the enjoyment of music.
My boyfriend has gone for the music but I know damn well he won't be tucked up in his tent as soon as the music stops reading a book and drinking tea.
I'm also worried he'll get hurt in some way. His friends are a bad influence on him and I'm scared of him taking drugs and something bad happening.
Reply 8
I know EXACTLY how you feel, my bf is at Reading too. I trust my boyfriend, but the other day in the pub all his friends were saying to me "they'll keep an eye on him", kinda implying he might do something. We've been together 18 months but i'm not as secure as i make out. Oh and he phoned me up at 6 yesterday evening saying that one of his friends had already shagged someone (what a classy girl that must have been, having met someone a maximum of 4 hours later then shagging in a tent 
). Also, my bf doesn't know when to stop drinking. I just feel really uneasy and can't relax 
). Also, my bf doesn't know when to stop drinking. I just feel really uneasy and can't relax Reply 9
16
Reading festival isn't just one giant shagfest. Unfortunately.
Reply 10
Totally the same situation, my boyfriend is at leeds. And it's basically the same as CheesyBeans - trust him, not the friends. very difficult considering they don't like me at all, i guess it's the fact we have a long term 2 yr relationship and they'd rather shag around.
I was supposed to be going myself but due to impending uni, I couldn't afford the ticket.. so i'm stuck at home. Am slightly annoyed as boyfriend promised he'd would text me letting me know he was alright and had got there safely etc, but has had his phone turned off since thursday afternoon and i know he had battery as he borrowed my charger grr. so shall be some questions asked when i see him.. but i dunno, guess he could have had his mobile pinched for all i know but still would be comforting to hear from him before monday... being the lonely worried girlfriend that i am lol.
Oh and OP, as far as I have observed in the last 3 Leeds Fests I've been to, no shagfests, well not in my camp site anyway lol... more drunkeness and drug taking. x
I was supposed to be going myself but due to impending uni, I couldn't afford the ticket.. so i'm stuck at home. Am slightly annoyed as boyfriend promised he'd would text me letting me know he was alright and had got there safely etc, but has had his phone turned off since thursday afternoon and i know he had battery as he borrowed my charger grr. so shall be some questions asked when i see him.. but i dunno, guess he could have had his mobile pinched for all i know but still would be comforting to hear from him before monday... being the lonely worried girlfriend that i am lol.
Oh and OP, as far as I have observed in the last 3 Leeds Fests I've been to, no shagfests, well not in my camp site anyway lol... more drunkeness and drug taking. x
Reply 11
aliclare
Totally the same situation, my boyfriend is at leeds. And it's basically the same as CheesyBeans - trust him, not the friends. very difficult considering they don't like me at all, i guess it's the fact we have a long term 2 yr relationship and they'd rather shag around.
I was supposed to be going myself but due to impending uni, I couldn't afford the ticket.. so i'm stuck at home. Am slightly annoyed as boyfriend promised he'd would text me letting me know he was alright and had got there safely etc, but has had his phone turned off since thursday afternoon and i know he had battery as he borrowed my charger grr. so shall be some questions asked when i see him.. but i dunno, guess he could have had his mobile pinched for all i know but still would be comforting to hear from him before monday... being the lonely worried girlfriend that i am lol.
Oh and OP, as far as I have observed in the last 3 Leeds Fests I've been to, no shagfests, well not in my camp site anyway lol... more drunkeness and drug taking. x
I was supposed to be going myself but due to impending uni, I couldn't afford the ticket.. so i'm stuck at home. Am slightly annoyed as boyfriend promised he'd would text me letting me know he was alright and had got there safely etc, but has had his phone turned off since thursday afternoon and i know he had battery as he borrowed my charger grr. so shall be some questions asked when i see him.. but i dunno, guess he could have had his mobile pinched for all i know but still would be comforting to hear from him before monday... being the lonely worried girlfriend that i am lol.
Oh and OP, as far as I have observed in the last 3 Leeds Fests I've been to, no shagfests, well not in my camp site anyway lol... more drunkeness and drug taking. x
Well my boyfriend phoned my from Leeds last night and all I could hear was giggling, screaming girls in the background which didn't exactly make me feel great.
My boyfriend used to smke weed quite often with the lads he's gone with. One of them in particular was smoking heavily every night and started to get really ratty if he couldn't. He always managed to persuade my boyfriend to join in because he does find it difficult to say no to his friends sometimes, I guess he just likes to please people. The weed started to affect my boyfriend in a bad way and he made a promise to himself and to me that he would seriously try to cut down but I know that he'll be as high as a kite at the moment and it wouldn't surprise me if he took over stuff too though. I don't want him to though. I know what he's like when he over does things and it's upsetting. So it's not just shagfests I'm worried about.
Reply 12
20
Reading festival!!! Wooooo!
First time in 5 years i havnt gone mostly due to being out of the country. But hopefully i can be some sort of authority on the matter 
Festivals ARNT the 'shagfest' (i think someone wrote earlier) that so many people imagine them to be. Yes, there are ovbiously a few 'easy' people going around, but of corse that would happen in any sample of 60,000 people. If anyone calls from anywhere at Reading, they are going to be surrounded by others no matter what, so dont get paranoid by girl's voices in the background.
speaking from experience, after 12 hours non-stop in the crowd watching bands, i frequently didnt have the energy to get drunk and party back at the campsite. Just wanted to go to sleep.
First time in 5 years i havnt gone
mostly due to being out of the country. But hopefully i can be some sort of authority on the matter Festivals ARNT the 'shagfest' (i think someone wrote earlier) that so many people imagine them to be. Yes, there are ovbiously a few 'easy' people going around, but of corse that would happen in any sample of 60,000 people. If anyone calls from anywhere at Reading, they are going to be surrounded by others no matter what, so dont get paranoid by girl's voices in the background.
speaking from experience, after 12 hours non-stop in the crowd watching bands, i frequently didnt have the energy to get drunk and party back at the campsite. Just wanted to go to sleep.
Reply 13
Ooh dont worry to much hes probs just into the music. Most ppl there just want to see bands ( not sleep with everyone in sight!)
I understand your concern though. My gf often goes to fabric and i dont go cause its not really my thing and i always worry that theres gonna be other guys hitting on her and she might do something with someone. But i guess im quite jealous and insecure.
I understand your concern though. My gf often goes to fabric and i dont go cause its not really my thing and i always worry that theres gonna be other guys hitting on her and she might do something with someone. But i guess im quite jealous and insecure.
Reply 14
he's probably thrusting right now
Reply 15
14
Don't worry if they don't call - mobiles are terrible over Reading weekend and in my experience, around 10% of calls get connected. 70,000 extra people in a small area means the local cell is under huge pressure.
Reply 16
CheesyBeans
Well my boyfriend phoned my from Leeds last night and all I could hear was giggling, screaming girls in the background which didn't exactly make me feel great.
My boyfriend used to smke weed quite often with the lads he's gone with. One of them in particular was smoking heavily every night and started to get really ratty if he couldn't. He always managed to persuade my boyfriend to join in because he does find it difficult to say no to his friends sometimes, I guess he just likes to please people. The weed started to affect my boyfriend in a bad way and he made a promise to himself and to me that he would seriously try to cut down but I know that he'll be as high as a kite at the moment and it wouldn't surprise me if he took over stuff too though. I don't want him to though. I know what he's like when he over does things and it's upsetting. So it's not just shagfests I'm worried about.
My boyfriend used to smke weed quite often with the lads he's gone with. One of them in particular was smoking heavily every night and started to get really ratty if he couldn't. He always managed to persuade my boyfriend to join in because he does find it difficult to say no to his friends sometimes, I guess he just likes to please people. The weed started to affect my boyfriend in a bad way and he made a promise to himself and to me that he would seriously try to cut down but I know that he'll be as high as a kite at the moment and it wouldn't surprise me if he took over stuff too though. I don't want him to though. I know what he's like when he over does things and it's upsetting. So it's not just shagfests I'm worried about.
least you get to speak to your boyfriend.. mine turned his phone on this morning, i saw my text from thursday deliver then he didn't bother to reply. lovely. tis making me think twice though,as normally no matter where he is, he always texts me at least once a day.
fortunately my boyfriend isn't really into drugs.. two of his friends are and they'll probably be trying to convince him to smoke weed etc but he probably won't have (if he knows whats good for him - he's seriously diabetic!) just hoping the excess binge drinking isn't going to make him have an hyperglycemic attack.. he's friends wouldn't be a lot of use if it did happen anyway lol.
only two nights to go anyhow, hopefully all the people who want to have a shagfest have found some partners and everyone else is enjoying the music
Reply 17
You either trust your boyfriend, or you don't. That's it, really.
Reply 18
Laces
You either trust your boyfriend, or you don't. That's it, really.
I see what your saying buts its not that simple. Its never that black or white.
You can trust your partner but still be apprehensive. Even if you trust them you can be scared they will do something...if anything that fear can be motivated by your love for them and fear of losing them.
Reply 19
13
I can be quite a jealous girlfriend, so don't write me off as someone who totally doesn't understand where you're coming from. It's not the best situation, though I'd probably be jealous more of the festival than the girls. But please, give your boyfriends a break. Festivals are brilliant. Yes, they are a place where people have sex, but that's the same where there is any large group of young people together. What are you going to do, stop him going to uni in case he gets dragged into the one night stand culture? I would hope that if 2 people are in a relationship there is a lot of mutual respect. In this case, that would mean that he would not cheat on you, regardless of how stupid/druggie/uncaring his friends are. It would also mean that you let him get on with it and enjoy his weekend, without demanding phone calls every 5 minutes (as somebody said, do you know how hard it is to get signal at Reading etc?!).
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