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Guilty
My parents divorced about 3 years ago - my older sister and I live with my mum - at least, we did until my sister recently moved out and now lives at uni. So it's just me and my mum. And I'm off to uni in September. I feel incredibly guilty at this - even though I shouldn't, but it's hard not to, my mum will be living alone, for at least a few months. She's extremely over protective, and we're fairly close - she doesn't have many close friends of her own who she goes out with. I know she wouldn't want me to feel guilty, and no way does she put any kind of pressure on me about not going out at night and leaving her home by herself, but I do feel so guilty. Thing is, I want to see my friends before we all leave, and I hate it that I stop myself going out because of my mum. Please tell me other people are like this?! Sorry for this jumbled up post, I just get really bogged down by these thoughts.
My mum is exactly the same. You just have to try and push those thoughts out your mind. It's your life and I am sure she understands that you need the experience of uni. I bet she's thinking 'Well I know she'll be back here in 3 years time once she's graduated' seeing as it's so hard to get on the property ladder now.
We talked nearly every day for a few mins on the phone and I think that made it easier for her.
We talked nearly every day for a few mins on the phone and I think that made it easier for her.
Yes I understand, except in my case, my mum's personality makes it utterly unbearable to be with her, yet I - like you - cannot help but worry and feel guilty when I'm not around.
I would suggest to you to get your mum 'out' - make more friends, perhaps even help her find a new bloke. This is what I would do for my mum, if her personality wasn't so messed up that she's pushed everyone away. It may take time, but I'm sure it'll be better for you and her in the end.
I would suggest to you to get your mum 'out' - make more friends, perhaps even help her find a new bloke. This is what I would do for my mum, if her personality wasn't so messed up that she's pushed everyone away. It may take time, but I'm sure it'll be better for you and her in the end.
Well it's good that you wanna look after your mum, but at the same time you need to look after yourself too. How're you gonna look after someone if you yourself are not well-looked-after? Do what you can to support your mum and keep her company and in general look after her, but you can only do your very best. You have a life too and if you want your mum to be happy, the best is to just go out and make a life for yourself and be happy and at the end of it, don't forget your mum who got you there and look after her in whatever way that's needed/appropriate. Your mum would want you to be happy and successful and have a good life - I think letting her know that you'll be ok is already a load off her shoulders. My mum is always saying that when I graduate, she can then die peacefully 
Dreary thought, but basically to her, if I have a good education it means I can then get a job and look after myself, and she would worry if I couldn't look after myself. And it would make her happy as long as I'm ok. I suspect your mum is probably the same about you 
Move in with her again when you've graduated. Living with your parent and looking after them is a good thing and not too uncommon. Maybe you could do that in the future if you wanted?
Dreary thought, but basically to her, if I have a good education it means I can then get a job and look after myself, and she would worry if I couldn't look after myself. And it would make her happy as long as I'm ok. I suspect your mum is probably the same about you Move in with her again when you've graduated. Living with your parent and looking after them is a good thing and not too uncommon. Maybe you could do that in the future if you wanted?
Being in kinda the same boat, When i left for college, my mum didn't really know anyone as we only been there for a few years and for certain reasons she couldn't go out that much, and i moved over to england for the summer meaning she was alone at the weekends, although my sister works at our house during the week, But this meant my mum was looking for things to do in the evenings and ended up taking a course for doing Nails (Whatever you ladies call it). so in the long run it could help your mum go out and make friends.
Although my parents arent divorced, and my sister is going no where, I did think about such a situation! As in, what it must be like. I too would feel quite bad about it.
The thing is, you're going to move out soon anyway, with so many years. If anything, perhaps the spare time will be good, your mom may see friends more or perhaps meet someone she can live with in the future.
The thing is, you're going to move out soon anyway, with so many years. If anything, perhaps the spare time will be good, your mom may see friends more or perhaps meet someone she can live with in the future.
At of the day, your mum has to sort her life out and you have to live your own life. I know that sounds harsh but I'm sure she will come to realise that she has to let you go. I'm sure she will be fine, just reassure her that you wont forget about her when your at university and keep in contact with her! dont feel guilty, your just living your life!
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