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Have I done the right thing? watch

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    I dumped my boyfriend of three months because he was pushing me sexually
    i didn't want to have sex yet, because I want to be sure that im in love before i take the step.

    we both go on really well, but this was getting on my nerves.
    we are both 21.

    have i dumped him for the wrong reason?

    I have another problem too. okay not a problem, but my friends make it out to be weird and strange.
    Im a virgin at 21, soon to be 22, but since I have never really loved anyone, I have refused to have sex.
    Each of my friends make a big deal out of it and say it's ridiculous.
    Why is it such a big deal?
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    Your standards are your own, if you weren't comfortable then you did the right thing. Sod what your friends tell you, it's not their life.

    I personally don't think it's worth waiting, it's not that big of a deal. However, you have to be happy with yourself above all else. I think you did the only fair thing if your boyfriend was getting frustrated.
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    :dito: If he didn't understand that you wanted to wait until you were sure about your feelings before having sex, then you definately are better off without him. Anyone who really loves you would understand and be willing to wait until you are sure the time is right.

    I think it is really smart that you are waiting for the right person to lose your viginity to. Although many people say that sex is highly overrated etc. your first time will be that much more special than if you had let your ex push you into doing it.
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    At the end of a the day its up to you when you want to sleep with someone, and shouldnt feel under pressure to do it... but on the other hand I can understand why a 21 year old man would be getting a little erm impatient after waiting for 3 months lol
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    (Original post by prettygreeneyes99)
    At the end of a the day its up to you when you want to sleep with someone, and shouldnt feel under pressure to do it... but on the other hand I can understand why a 21 year old man would be getting a little erm impatient after waiting for 3 months lol
    three months isn't exactly very long imo
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    (Original post by AKAA12)
    three months isn't exactly very long imo
    Well everyone's different, im sure you'll be able to find someone who respects you enough to be happy to wait whatever amount of time that you want to... it may just be the guys I know, but I could see them getting quite 'worked up' after three months of being with someone and not being able to have that part of a physical relationship with them
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    I think 3 months is really long for a guy....but you need to feel ready before doing it
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    It's your decision - but wanting to have sex with your partner at 21 years old is a perfectly reasonable request. I wouldn't stay with someone who was reluctant to sleep with me.
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    (I would have a problem with my bf if after 3 months he didnt want to have sex)
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    oh well I just don't think we are that close yet so I said no.
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    I think that what you have done is a good thing.I mean if you werent comfortable with sex,regardless of age,you shouldnt feel pressured into it.

    I do have to say that its not that special when you do "lose it" and that most people find it uncomfortable and awkard anyway,but still,dont do it until you are ready.

    Your friends,IMO are a bit silly for laughing at the fact you are still a virgin!

    You shouldnt have to feel pressured into anything,and Im sure if the bloke really respected you he would have understood your wishes to wait.And its not like it is the only way to get relief LOL!

    Me and my BF waited 3 months before we slept together and it was well worth the wait..I suppose he was a bit fed up of waiting,but he respected my wishes to not take things to quickly and end up regretting them,and I thank him for that..!
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    You should never let a guy push you to do anything you don't want to. So in the end, you did the right thing.
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    (Original post by DodgyTrousers)
    Your standards are your own, if you weren't comfortable then you did the right thing. Sod what your friends tell you, it's not their life.

    I personally don't think it's worth waiting, it's not that big of a deal. However, you have to be happy with yourself above all else. I think you did the only fair thing if your boyfriend was getting frustrated.
    I know that hardly anyone these days thinks it is a big deal, but I do. I would only want to have sex with someone I was in love in and so far I haven't loved anyone.
    It isn't because of religious reasons though. I find it annoying when people assume I am probably catholic if I have waited this long.
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    The longer you wait the more of a disappointment it will be... the greater the risk you take... also, the more time you waste! You're 21! You could have had sex hundreds of times by now.
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    I think you also have to ask why you want to wait as well... You've already said you want to wait til you're in love with someone but why? Is it because you think you'll sleep with someone and they'll run off? Sex is better when you're in love with someone but I think when you've been with someone a month or two then it helps alot in getting to know them/feeling closer to them
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    that is the reason. I don't think it's worth it until you're in love and committed. To be in love, I don't think you need to have had sex. I think a month or two isn't long enough. To be committed you should have atleast been together for longer than that.
    and No, I don't think the person will run off or anything lol
    It's something special so I would want to wait.
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    Hmm, well I understand where your coming from... But as I said before I think alot of the 21 year old guys are going to get a lil pushy if after 3 months you havent slept with them, but I think when you do find someone who'll wait then you'll definately know they're worth it at least
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    We always have these threads. It doesn't matter if you're 22, or 42 - it's your choice.
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    yeah I know that guys that age would be pushing for it but if someone really wants to be with you then he wouldn't push you for sex.
    Like I said, I think it's something special and I feel that you should only have sex when you're committed to each other.
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    (Original post by PhilMc)
    We always have these threads. It doesn't matter if you're 22, or 42 - it's your choice.
    Yes, I searched to find similar threads.
    But all the threads were about people whining that they haven't had sex at 18, etc.
    I'm not ashamed or upset about it. That is why I haven't posted as anon.
 
 
 
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