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Always friends

I had a look to see if this had been posted before but as far as I could see there were only specific problems and this is more of a general issue. Sorry if I was mistaken. :smile:

The problem is that I seem to be constantly friends with boys but it never goes anywhere else. I've always got on with boys quite well and have never been too much of a girly girl, but I'm not a total tomboy - unfortunately it seems I am just friend material for the vast majority of boys I know.
I've tried to be a little bit more flirty with guys I like but I don't want to go over the top and embarrass myself and them. I don't really see what I can do to get certain boys to see me as a potential girlfriend rather than just someone to have a laugh with. It's ridiculous - the only boys who have ever expressed an interest in me have been people I wanted to be just friends with!
Am I giving off the wrong signals or something? I try to be fairly chatty but am not a naturally loud, talkative person. Anyone got any advice?

Thanks in advance. :biggrin:

Reply 1

~Kirsty~

Maybe you need to make the first move more obvious - or maybe the right guy hasn't come along yet. You don't need to rush into a relationship.

Reply 2

supersteiger

Snap! Although unfortunately if I had any pearls of wisdom on this I would have used them on myself... :p:

Reply 3

Do Chickens Fly

Be confident enough to make the first move yourself.

Reply 4

DodgyTrousers

I'll attempt to read between the lines here.

It looks like each time you act like one of their mates, then one of two things happens after a few weeks(?):
A) They like you but you don't like them (at least you're attractive!)
B) You like them but you're pidgeon-holed into friend already and they won't see it unless you are massively forward.

The best way out of if is to be more upfront. Men are generally emotionally dense creatures, and we don't usually "get" flirting. If I tried to pursue every woman who flirted with me I'd be overworked, therefore I assume that like me most men don't take it seriously either. You probably need more than flirty. Go for a kiss! Physical contact sends a clear message, flirting could just be playing.

Reply 5

Apollo

Wow, exact same situation (well, with girls, but you know what I mean)

Reply 6

jenna_is_ace

Totally the same position as you. All the boys see me as 'one of the lads'. Great. not that I'd want to get with any of them anyway.
I'd say just make the first move, see what happens. If you get rejected then just shrug it off and try again with someone else maybe?
Hell I get rejected by people I don't even fancy?!!
(I got texts lastnight off my friend Ben saying that I should try and get with someone more reliable and that he's 'just like every other guy' I was just like "what?!" Big-headed bastard assumes I want to make him my boyfriend?!)(Sorry had to rant somewhere)