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Eating disorders etc at uni...need advice. watch

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    I have an eating disorder,anorexia with bulimic tendencies and am struggling with my recovery at the moment.I will be moving out to go to uni in a couple of weeks to self catered halls and am worried about how I will manage for myself with no-one to keep an eye on what I am eating so to speak and how I can keep it hidden from people.Do i just make out I'm a really fussy eater or something?I hate eating in front of or with people and am still very selective about when,where and how much I eat.I also struggle with depression,panic attacks and self harm,so all in all not a good combo!!

    Also I am worried that there will be quite a lot of people that suffer from ED's at uni and that I may get caught up in it all again...I know that sounds a bit dumb but I really do find it hard to be around really skinny people and when people talk about diets,weight etc all the time. I've tries to keep it hidden in the past and when it does come out my "friends" have always treated me like a walking calorie counter,or ask me for diet tips or just run away cos they think I'm some sort of freak.

    Does anyone have any experience of living with an ED and all the other stuff at uni or how many people I might encounter with problems and can give me some advice??Thanks...
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    I'm actually in the same boat, except that my recovery position might be a bit stronger than yours at the moment.

    Firstly, I'm going to tell you to stop worrying about other people noticing your ED, because that's not as important as you managing it. I know where you're coming from though.

    The first few weeks are always going to be the hardest. I don't know if it's just me, but I always struggle with eating when I have a change of scene. And you know how it can snowball, so it's REALLY REALLY REALLY important that you keep in control in those early weeks.

    I'll also say that it might even be easier for you, with nobody watching your eating, because that means (maybe for the first time in a while) that it really is up to you, and being at home, where everyone knows about the ED, and you feel like there are certain expectations about what you're going to eat, can actually really hold you back in recovery, I think.

    And about getting drawn into certain circles and certain conversations... That's a really tricky one. Basically, I think you just have to be really strict with yourself, and walk away whenever you think one of those situations is coming.

    You get really close to people really quickly when you're all living at such close quarters - closer than you've probably ever been to any of your friends. I, personally, think it's a good idea to let at least one of these friends in - when you feel like it's right. Don't force it though.

    God, this is long... And I could keep going and going! Please PM me, and maybe we could talk.
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    It seems that what you need is support. Keeping it hidden is going to make it harder for yourself and harder to stick to your recovery. Try to find someone to confide in. You will be assigned a personal tutor when you start uni who is there to help you with your academic health, personal health and general welfare. Just try to confide in them and gain support, if you don't trust them, head to your dean (of your subject) and talk to them and/or ask for another tutor who you trust you can talk to and who you believe can help you.

    Alternatively, when you sign up for student health services, pay your doctor a visit down there, talk through what you're going through and ask what help he can offer you. I don't know why you're going down the ED and self harming route, self confidence? Things that have happened in your past? But finding someone to talk to, like your doctor or student counsellor to help sort out why you are going through what you are, or what you are doing and why can only help. There are lots of support agencies and networks out there. Some for the general people, and some specifically for students, all you need to do is go out there and look for it.

    ED and self catering? Everyone is different and has their weird habits and needs. I had a flat mate who i completely freaked out by putting chicken into separate bags (i wasn't trying to suffocate it, it was already dead and in the form of chicken breasts) sure, we laughed about it briefly, but these little bits are what makes us what we are. Who cares if i'm a neat freak (which was the common consensus in the flat?), that Y is nocturnal or that X is gay? Personally, i don't care what people think about me because i know that the people around me, my friends and family, know differently. Sure, if someone is genuinely taking it too far, bullying, harassment, etc, inform your warden or tutor and get it sorted out, don't suffer in silence.

    Surely part of your treatment/recovery is to overcome your regimented eating habits, at certain times, certain amounts, with certain people, maybe going to uni can actually help you break that. In my flat we all cooked together every evening, some of us cooked/shared the cooking, one person would cook one meal one night, the other, the next day. That way, in effect, you've got someone making sure you're eating healthily and properly, of course it all depends on whether this person has an ED or any sense of cooking. Its all down to you as to how and when you want/can help yourself.

    Socialise, befriend people who like you and who you like being around, not people who abuse/like you calorie counting ability. Everybody is in the same position in that they know nobody. I had one other friend at uni and i bumped into him a handful of times in the whole year because i'd made so many other friends. Maybe not making friends with skinny people or calorie counting obsessives but with people who just enjoy having a good time would be a good option?

    I can't say i know how many people at uni has EDs. They are increasing as people become increasingly obsessed with their looks. I just try to be happy with who i am, sure i like to look after myself (like many of the people i know at uni), but i don't let it control my life. Sure, me and a few mates occassionally talked about what we were doing in the gym or trying to achieve, and occassionally people talked about trying to lose their beer babies, but it isn't everywhere. If my mates are going out but it means i'll miss a gym session, i'll go out. If we decide to have a pub lunch instead of going home and cooking a proper, balanced meal, i'll go to the pub. Live for the day, not for your obsessions/routines.

    I think you'll probably have more problems with people trying to get you drunk than force you into anorexia.

    Again, i can't really comment because i don't have an ED so i don't see things in the same way as you. I hope i've been a help. Get some help and sort yourself out, it can only make you feel better and enjoy life more.
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    i too am in the same boat as the OP so therefore have no advice to offer, i just wanted to say that if you want to PM me OP to help get through things, you can, i'd like to have someone who knows what i'm going through, take care xx
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    i went to uni as a recovered anorexic and i was so paranoid about it all coming back cos it wouldn't take much, i know.

    BUT the fact is... you have the total power to eat when you want to eat and what you want to eat, so you have the power back... whereas before it was about having control about what you eat.

    I find it so much easier to eat more at uni than when i'm at home during the holidays n stuff.

    If any of you want to talk about it or just generally rant about it, just pm me =]
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    OH and no-one knew about my anorexia at uni... so I felt I was making a new start.

    Then when i lived with one of my closest friends I told her of my anorexia and it took the pressure off... I had someone there to kind of... help me cos I always cooked my dinner with her and ate with her!
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    ok I'm another person in the same boat, so I don't have a great deal of meaningful advice, but if you want to PM me feel free! where are you going to uni? I think it's gonna be hard, but if you're committed enough to recovery it's possible to manage. as for other people, they don't have to know anything if you don't want them to. I always get paranoid about what others think, but tbh in freshers week everything's going to be manic and busy, I doubt anyone will pay loads of attention to what you're eating. maybe make sure you take some supplements (nutridrink or whatever) with you so if you're busy or panicked around people you have a quick easy way of replacing a meal. if you're supposed to be gaining weight that could be especially important. anyway, if the OP or anyone else in the thread want to talk to someone going through the same thing, I'm more than up for it, PM me and I'll give you my msn address or something.
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    The first week or so will be quite hectic, i expect that alot of people will be so nervous and self-absorbed (not in a bad way just in a wanting to make a good impression and make friends way) that they wont really notice your eating habits that much.

    Although depending on who youre living with i would warn you that as youre all getting to know each other as a flat it might be suggested that you all get a takeaway together and stuff like that. But you can always either order something small or if its something where you all just dip in just have a small portion or whatever.

    I would also agree with the person who suggested that you should confide in someone, youll be living with these people so youll become very close to one or two of them and i think youll know when it feels right to tell someone. But see how you go for a little while, like someone said the freedom might even do you good.

    Good luck
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    Im also going to uni at the end of september and i currently suffer from bulimia. I recently asked to see a therapist and I have had 2 sessions with her so far. However, i don't think it is working because I still binge and purge almost everyday and usually more than once a day.

    I am scared that when I get to uni I will either eat too much and not be able to purge and gain alot of weight, or I will not eat much and lose alot of weight. (I suffered from anorexia 2 years ago).

    I was thinking of taking a gap year and go to uni when i am ready but i thought its better to just go straight into uni because it could actually help me recover (being away from home and all the pressure from my family).

    I wrote that i have bulimia on the form to sign up with the medical centre at the uni so hopefully when i get there, they can offer me some counselling or something.
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    i found uni really helped me put it behind me - kinda... take responsibility for myself etc etc ....

    its worked so far =]

    i hope you guys get through it ok, it'll be tough sure, BUT it might end up being a turning point - new start n all that =]
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    (Original post by LouiseCap)
    Im also going to uni at the end of september and i currently suffer from bulimia. I recently asked to see a therapist and I have had 2 sessions with her so far. However, i don't think it is working because I still binge and purge almost everyday and usually more than once a day.
    Don't be put of by the fact that no noticeable improvement has been made yet. Its probably gonna take a lot more than 2 sessions for you to begin to make an improvement so try and keep on with therapy for the time being

    My advice to anyone going to uni recovering from an eating disorder (or even recovered but worried about it resurfacing) is just to be honest with people. Confide in someone you get on with and get some support on your side. Also don't forget that even if you are away from home, it doesn't mean you can't stop talking to friends and family-they know what you've had to deal with and sometimes, if you've had a particularly bad day-just a phone call to rant and talk things through can help.
 
 
 
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