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"best" friends birthday - not being officially asked? watch

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    So I ask my friend around 2months ago to take her out for her bday (she never planned to do anything)..and she agreed.

    Two weeks ago she starts asking me where to go for her bday etc.. I get annoyed and say how "I asked ages ago" and how she basically blew me away.. didn't even say sorry or anything :rolleyes: She's asked me what restaurant to go, what to do, what to wear... and I was the FIRST person she even told she was organising this...she says she's confused cos her "friends keep asking her what to do"...so she tells me shes invited all her friends..

    But she still never even attempted to ask me! And the one time I asked where she's going... she says "are you fishing for an invitation"..even though I just asked to be polite!

    We've managed to talk at least three hours a day in the past two years of knowing each other...clearly her "friends" mean MUCH more than I do.

    So pee'd off its unbelievable. I officially don't believe in best friends. :rolleyes: How would everyone else react to this?

    One of her friends keeps telling me to go.. infact shes the one inviting me although its not even her bday.. seems like my "bestfriend" doesn't even want me there! And my bestfriend keeps telling everyone that she DID invite me.. and I said no.. just to make herself look better! She never once went and said "you are coming to my bday right" or anything even remotely similar.

    What's more she tells me on Friday that I "make her feel down" and she likes being around "happy people". WTF - Is it my fault three members of my family are all critically ill and I basically gotta support them all I can't be happy unless I am truely happy.

    Frankly I don't think I'm going to trust anyone for a good few years, can't believe how many *****es and fake people there are! . :mad:
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    Just turn up. If I only went to parties I was explicitly invited to I never would have got a social life.
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    If she is your best friend then of course you are not going to invite you offically.
    I did not understand most of your post but things seem hard can you just not talk to her tell her how your life is and how you need her help, problem shared is a problem halfed.
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    she probably hasnt invited you because she just presums ur atomatically going!
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    I'd be pissed too.

    Especially after her making that "are you fishing for an invitation" comment, that just shows that she didn't just assume you're coming because you're her best mate.

    She sounds like a selfish brat to me. That's out of order about that happy comment if she knows about your family members being ill.
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    I agree with ^^ Maybe she presumed you were going to go if you are best friends and all. If its really bothering you just ask her straight out. If shes pissy with you already its not going to make much difference is it?
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    There's two possibilities here:
    1) As you're her "best friend", she just assumed you'd know you were invited.
    2) She's horrible and selfish and not worth your friendship.
    I've got to say though, from the things you've said, and her comments, it sounds more likely that its 2). In which case she's not worth you're time.
    And I agree that her saying you "make her feel down" considering the circumstances is really out of order, and I wonder if she ever stopped and thought about how she's making you feel down!
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    Well seeing as the "best friend" has told others that the OP has been invited and turned it down I don't think she's just assumed the OP should know she's invited...

    This is a bit of a strange situation. I think you should ask your "best friend" casually, "What do you think I should wear to your birthday party?" and see how she reacts. Otherwise just turn up really.
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    I can understand you may feel shy about going to a party you don't feel you've been expressly invited to, but take in mind, even if you wasn't invited, no one would be rude enough to actually say it, so you would just have fun, and never know you wasn't invited. The above posters advise is great.
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    Just ask her straight out? "Am I invited?"

    If yes, then hooray.
    If no, then forget the biatch.
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    I always think thats a little weird, but I suppose it would work randomgirl.
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    You could ask her the time the party starts if you don't already know it or if you do, double check it. It's possible she was joking when she said the 'fishing for an invitation' thing. Do you know and get on with most of her other friends? If not, maybe she thinks it'd be awkward having you there. If you do and she definitely doesn't want you there, I guess she's just a ***** and perhaps doesn't think of you in the same way as you see her.
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    (Original post by randomgirl)
    Just ask her straight out? "Am I invited?"

    If yes, then hooray.
    If no, then forget the biatch.
    :ditto: :ditto: :ditto: :ditto: :ditto:

    Oh, and also:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    What's more she tells me on Friday that I "make her feel down" and she likes being around "happy people". WTF - Is it my fault three members of my family are all critically ill and I basically gotta support them all I can't be happy unless I am truely happy.
    No, it's not your fault. But is it her fault that depressed people make her depressed? You can't do anything about your situation, she can do something about hers. Might be selfish, but it's the way a lot of people work. Trust me on that one.
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    Hmm, surely she cant have just assumed you were going if she was asking you things like 'are you fishing for an invitation'... just turn up, Im guessing that you're also friends with some of the people going? Go with one of them, and if she starts being funny... well, actually she shouldnt start being funny if she's your friend!
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    It does seem a bit odd that she's so off with you, but I agree with the others - just ask her if you're in invited (or even ask if you can go - do the fishing for an invite thing like she said!).

    Also, I think she still does care about you, even though she's being a bit strange. Why else would she ask your advice on where to go, and even what to wear? She must still value her friendship with you And if you talk to her about your family situation, I'm sure she'll be supportive. If she isn't, then she isn't really a good friend at all.

    Good luck with it all, tell us how you get on
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    I have got myself so wound up in the past thinking I'm not invited to my best friends' birthdays. Everytime I have got it completely wrong and they'd just automatically assumed I was going.

    If she is genuinely doing it deliberately, then just completely ditch the friendship. You don't need best friends like that at all. People may say it's pathetic loosing a friend because she hasn't invited you to her bday meal.. But, obviously it stems much deeper and she's a crap friend. Try and have a massive house paryt that weekend at your house and persuade everyone going to the meal to go to your house. She'll learn a harsh lesson and you'd have an amazing time. That's the sort of thing I'd do if I was in your situation.
 
 
 
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