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boyfriend is frighteningly controlling, lashed out watch


    sounds like a bonobo, you can't change how he is, you either accept his abusive jealousy or leave him
    • #2

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    why did this Muslim man think that women shouldn't be allowed to go to the gym? I mean I don't understand why my own boyfriend keeps questioning WHY I'm going to the gym, it's a bit obvious that I like to keep fit and know it's good for me, yet he repeatedly asks why I go often and says I don't need to go, then I tell him it's a hobby of mine like football is his!
    I think it's to do with dress code. Some interpretations of Islam require Muslim women to wear both the headscarf and long black dresses. Others, just the headscarf and body covered, but not necessarily black dresses and I have seen Muslim women go to my gym wearing a headscarf and a long sleeved top and loose tracksuit bottoms, but that man didn't believe that was acceptable due to his mentality.

    I am aware of his argument, but disagree myself. But I'm not sure why your boyfriend will say something like that if he is not a Muslim. Maybe he believes that the gym is a place that men often flirt with women?

    As for your recent post, I was laughing at his pathetic attempt to make you jealous. But seriously you should consider where you are heading with this type of behaviour. It's not acceptable and if he can't see the injustice in what he is doing, then that is a major concern.
    • #5

    hun you need to leave him
    that's a bright red neon flag
    situations like that never get better, even if it has for a while it's still in him and he's more than likely to have the tendency to do it again, or even worse
    it may sound cliche or repetitive but it is veryy true
    but maybe wait it out a very small while, wait for him to calm down and be normal with you again
    definitely do not marry him, that would be like setting up a trap for yourself
    • #5

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Oh I thought it was something to be really alarmed about. He did say to me something like 'look I don't speak to women out of respect for you, I don't even look at them in that way because I only look at you like that, yes women they speak to me but I cut it off really quickly so why can you not do this for me?' Maybe that's a good point. I'm just really not used to this because my last boyfriend was the least controlling guy ever, we did what we wanted, whenever we wanted. He'd even want to go alone to a female friends house to watch a movie, he'd ask if I was okay and I'd just be like yeah whatever sure
    it IS something to be alarmed about, it's a red flag
    he sounds extremely toxic and he shouldn't be making you feel that way over something innocent
    situations like these never get better,and if they do they always come back.
    you'll obviously want to make it work, but you shouldn't over this reason
    honestly i think you should leave him, the tendency to do it again is there, i'm sorry
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