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Muslims who have boyfriends/girlfriends Watch

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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Yes she is, and practicing too. I don't know how I'll explain that I'm an ex-Muslim after marriage.
    You do realise that she'll leave u after u tell her ur not a Muslim. You're pretending to be someone ur not, it's not gna end well and ur in denial if u think it is loool
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    (Original post by redleader1)
    So you would go out with him rather than anything arranged

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    I would not go for the type of marriages where I meet my husband for the first time at my wedding. My parents had one of those and for some people it can work but i've seen the downside of it.

    I've had two wedding proposals which first went through my mother. I would want to get to know him first rather than just give a straight and automatic yes. I feel that you can spend time with someone and do it safely, we might not get engaged but the main intent would be marriage not just having fun. Is this man someone I would want to be the father of my child? I'm not a saint, I made mistakes and I got burnt, but I'm different because of it.

    I would just first of all ensure that he understood my boundaries. I've already waited for so long, what difference would more time make? I wanted to rush before and get it over and done with, but I now want my first kiss to mean something. I try not to have situations where it was just us alone together, because It's so much more easier to get carried away. I want someone who truly loved me for me and not just for my body.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    This is NOT intended to be a Muslim bashing thread but I am genuinely curious about a few things regarding Muslims who are in relationships before marriage, whether that be with other Muslims or with a non Muslim.

    How far would you go physically with your bf/gf? Would you have sex before marriage?
    If you don't do anything physical with them what makes them different from being just a friend? How often do you meet up with them? What do you do on your dates?
    Please don't refer to these people as Muslims

    A Good Muslim who follows the religion properly won't even go near these things (from knowledge and experiences)
    A Bad Muslim who doesn't follow his religion's teachings (1. shouldn't be called a Muslim) and 2. Will do pretty much anything. It may start of as a kiss and over time it escalates to intercourse.


    If you are a Muslim then I advise you please come back to your religion. If you're not, then do whatever you want, idc. Just remember that this WILL have consequences. I guarantee you. I even know people who have been involved in this and future partners have as a result tried to commit suicide.
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    I have a felling that vast majority thinks religion describes a person.
    • #9
    #9

    Like some of the others have said, I am in no position to judge...

    Having recently moved into halls there's a nice international student from Pakistan in my flat. She spoke a lot about her boyfriend back in Pakistan (before they broke up) as well as their sexual encounters including sex itself. He wasn't her first. She would also bring 'guy friends' back to the flat to chill out in her room/stay over etc.

    As I said not judging, I just think do your thing... other Muslim friends of hers did however judge behind her back...
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    (Original post by Lemons1990)
    I would not go for the type of marriages where I meet my husband for the first time at my wedding. My parents had one of those and for some people it can work but i've seen the downside of it.

    I've had two wedding proposals which first went through my mother. I would want to get to know him first rather than just give a straight and automatic yes. I feel that you can spend time with someone and do it safely, we might not get engaged but the main intent would be marriage not just having fun. Is this man someone I would want to be the father of my child? I'm not a saint, I made mistakes and I got burnt, but I'm different because of it.

    I would just first of all ensure that he understood my boundaries. I've already waited for so long, what difference would more time make? I wanted to rush before and get it over and done with, but I now want my first kiss to mean something. I try not to have situations where it was just us alone together, because It's so much more easier to get carried away. I want someone who truly loved me for me and not just for my body.
    Yes very true, and arranged marriages depends, I would never meet my wife on the wedding day. You need to get to know them first to see if your compatible.
    • #5
    #5

    (Original post by Ribbit1234)
    You do realise that she'll leave u after u tell her ur not a Muslim. You're pretending to be someone ur not, it's not gna end well and ur in denial if u think it is loool
    She doesn't need to know anything. Even though we'll be sleeping in the same bed, she doesn't need to know she's sleeping next to an ex-Muslim.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    She doesn't need to know anything. Even though we'll be sleeping in the same bed, she doesn't need to know she's sleeping next to an ex-Muslim.
    Yes she does.
    • #10
    #10

    (Original post by sameehaiqbal)
    Yes she does.
    I don't think his girlfriend is a Muslim.
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I don't think his girlfriend is a Muslim.
    He's engaged to her, and she is a Muslim, he has mentioned it himself.
    • #10
    #10

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    He's engaged to her, and she is a Muslim, he has mentioned it himself.
    Oh wow, what a jerk...
    • #5
    #5

    (Original post by sameehaiqbal)
    Yes she does.
    Why does she need to know? What benefit is there? Surely there is more damage done.

    I mean she will know that I don't practice as I don't pray, fast, and I go to bars to drink. She doesn't do any of that but she doesn't need to know that I don't believe in the religion.
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    so a girl you supposedly care for. you dont have the balls to tell her the truth. a relationship filled with lies is no relationship. she deserves honesty.
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    wouldn't break my virginity for anyone before marriage. although im quite liberal . the most ive done is hold hands and made guys horny but caring lol
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Why does she need to know? What benefit is there? Surely there is more damage done.

    I mean she will know that I don't practice as I don't pray, fast, and I go to bars to drink. She doesn't do any of that but she doesn't need to know that I don't believe in the religion.
    Me, and other people have said this to you 20 times already. You are violating her trust and her faith. Do you not seem to understand this concept? How heartless and oblivious can you be? Nobody is asking you to be a Muslim, none of us are forcing Islam down your throat, that is entirely your choice. All we're asking is for you to be honest to your fiancee. You are not being honest. Your marriage is an entire lie.
    • #5
    #5

    (Original post by sameehaiqbal)
    Me, and other people have said this to you 20 times already. You are violating her trust and her faith. Do you not seem to understand this concept? How heartless and oblivious can you be? Nobody is asking you to be a Muslim, none of us are forcing Islam down your throat, that is entirely your choice. All we're asking is for you to be honest to your fiancee. You are not being honest. Your marriage is an entire lie.
    I will come out later. It's just about finding the right time, and that time certainly isn't now. I do intend to have the Islamic wedding Nikkah which she desires and even though I don't believe in it, I still gain the cultural practice for self-satisfaction.

    I personally don't think you know how difficult it is for us ex-Muslims. In fact VERY few of my friends who are ex-Muslim have come out and there is a reason why because of the drama it will cause with out families and friends. It's all about finding the right moment to come out. Sometimes that may be never depending of circumstances.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I will come out later. It's just about finding the right time, and that time certainly isn't now. I do intend to have the Islamic wedding Nikkah which she desires and even though I don't believe in it, I still gain the cultural practice for self-satisfaction.

    I personally don't think you know how difficult it is for us ex-Muslims. In fact VERY few of my friends who are ex-Muslim have come out and there is a reason why because of the drama it will cause with out families and friends. It's all about finding the right moment to come out. Sometimes that may be never depending of circumstances.
    So you just stay silent? What if your wife expects you to be somewhat practising? You'd have to fast and pray ... ?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I will come out later. It's just about finding the right time, and that time certainly isn't now. I do intend to have the Islamic wedding Nikkah which she desires and even though I don't believe in it, I still gain the cultural practice for self-satisfaction.

    I personally don't think you know how difficult it is for us ex-Muslims. In fact VERY few of my friends who are ex-Muslim have come out and there is a reason why because of the drama it will cause with out families and friends. It's all about finding the right moment to come out. Sometimes that may be never depending of circumstances.
    The Nikkah will make you a Muslim again.

    I dont care? Doesnt justify your behaviour to me to be honest.
    • #5
    #5

    (Original post by starfab)
    So you just stay silent? What if your wife expects you to be somewhat practising? You'd have to fast and pray ... ?
    I'll pretend to fast. Usually I just eat during lunch break at work.

    And as for praying, I don't think she will mind, but I'm not sure as we have not discussed that.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'll pretend to fast. Usually I just eat during lunch break at work.

    And as for praying, I don't think she will mind, but I'm not sure as we have not discussed that.
    Didn't you say she is practising? If so then she will mind about your not praying.
    Imo, to marry her as an ex-muslim, and for her to be oblivious to this, is probably he worst kind of betrayal..
    I can't see how she would ever take it well when you do tell her after marriage... ?
 
 
 
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