Why am I not like everyone else?

Im female and for some reason have never liked or had the urge for sex, im not young either so its not a phase. I have tried it but I didnt like kissing, found oral annoying and intercourse hurt/did nothing for me. I do enjoy things like hugging, massage and being close though and for some reason a thing that turns me on a lot is having my back touched/massaged/tickled etc but all people seem to care about is kissing and typical sex.

I can get aroused in my own within 5 minutes and this has been my sex life for the past 10 years.. just being single on my own. I am an introvert and dont like socialising much (not that ive ever had friends to go out with anyway lol) which might have something to do with it. Im not sure why im like this though its as though i dont have a sexuality. I can get crushes on men but am not turned on by the thought of typical sex.

Reply 1

Anya_H_

You don't have to worry. Everyone is different! You're fine honestly.

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Reply 2

unprinted

No one is like everyone else - it's one of the things that makes human sexuality so interesting.

Masturbation is great, and it should also be possible to find someone who's into back stroking and then, for example, masturbating together rather than having 'sex'.

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Original post by unprinted

That would be such a miracle! It seems everyone is just into kissing, oral followed by intercourse. The trouble is knowing who's into what and who could go without oral since you dont tend to discuss these things on the initial few dates with someone.

Reply 4

Hopefully1

I agree with the other posters that you are an individual and you don't have a strong sex drive, at least not in the typical manner, but there is nothing inherently 'wrong' with you. Now, you have to make the next decision. What is more important to you: being more introverted, keeping to yourself, staying single because you don't particularly like traditional sex and may just prefer going solo or would you prefer to meet someone special (which would require choosing to socialize) and having a connection with someone for companionship and love? There is no right answer here - just just have to decide what you want. If, however, you want to be in a committed relationship then you're going to have to step outside of your comfort zone and go with the not so satisfying traditional sex. In a relationship there is give and take. You will need to be cognizant of pleasing your partner. Then you get to tell you partner what you like. To be honest once a relationship is established the 'hot sex' part becomes less of the focal point anyway and there develops more cuddling etc. No relationship works the same as any other relationship anyway so maybe you won't have to have a lot of traditional sex but if that is what your partner prefers then you need to be ready to participate and on occasion and they need to be willing just to cuddle and have closeness without sex on occasion as well.
No matter what you choose you are normal. Good luck!

Reply 5

Anonymous #2

i'm basically the same, never been interested in sex or felt the urge to do it yet i masturbate haha. was the person you tried sex with someone you really liked? as i feel once i really like/love someone i'm more keen to have sex more because i enjoy the closeness and less because it feels good

Reply 6

Omxrkai

Everyone is different and thats what makes each individual special. You do you and don't let the norm affect you in any way.

Stay positive and strong :top:

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Reply 7

unprinted

Original post by Anonymous

The trouble is knowing who's into what and who could go without oral since you dont tend to discuss these things on the initial few dates with someone.