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    I knew a couple of girls who had asked their boyfriends to "rape" them. Theres the law, then theres the subjective.
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    Maybe you just have a rape fetish.

    I mean person A.
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    (Original post by augustvv)
    The real question here is why would A forgive and marry this person that is quite clearly a rapist?
    Trauma bonding / Stockholm syndrome
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    (Original post by Rakas21)
    I would certainly say that the intent to rape was there and that for at least part of the act, it should be deemed rape.



    Well strictly speaking the decision regarding proceeding with a rape allegation is that of the individual in question. If person B considered the dominance to have outweighed the lack of consent then as much as i may consider A to be an inferior form of life, there's no obligation on you to have the guy prosecuted.

    Ultimately there are girls out there who want a master/slave relationship or want it incredibly rough (i had a girl tell me that if i could not make her cry then it was not rough enough) and if you are content to be with a man who does not believe consent is important then that is your decision as an individual.
    Yes, I do think that in this case person A didn't really take the lack of consent as harmful, considering that A wanted to continue the relationship with B afterwards which implies that A didn't see the wrong in it, but maybe A's judgment wasn't clear enough and rather indecisive.
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    (Original post by Rakas21)
    While i agree that person B is a rapist i tend to disagree with the view that there is any abuse or control that is not warranted here. As much as feminists and the like may not like it, there are women that enjoy being submissive and giving their partner control. Now in cases like this i would say that it is wrong for the state to intrude on what individual A has decided was okay behaviour even if i agree person B is an ass.

    Kind of like how a lot of people don't feel that sex with a drunk girl is wrong even though it technically may be. Ultimately, that is for the individuals in question to decide.
    It's clear that what may seem a destructive relationship to others, doesn't seem at all to A thus A's decision was to accept it as sex rather than rape which law implies it is.
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    (Original post by EC)
    27.818 interviews in Europe

    1007 interviews in Romania

    1306 in the UK

    Multiple questions to see what people think of domestic violence against women and men and their views on rape.
    Why would you be surprised that some people are ignorant and that some would find it acceptable?
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    Yes, because Person A didn't want Person B to do it, it doesn't matter if they enjoy it half way through. If somebody was going to stab you and when they stuck the knife into you, you were a masochist that doesn't make them stabbing you suddenly okay, they're still stabbing you; which is wrong.
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    (Original post by EC)
    Lol, not yelling. Sorry.

    I'm the type who is trying to understand both sides and get more informed on such aspects, not blaming or trying to come as I'm defending anyone.
    Okey doke

    (Original post by JohnGreek)
    It's rape, but the woman probably wouldn't report it, so yeah... Nothing actually gets enforced.
    lol
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    (Original post by SonoLuma)
    I knew a couple of girls who had asked their boyfriends to "rape" them. Theres the law, then theres the subjective.
    right but shes not talking about that. The example says, she tried to get away.
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    I don't think it's relevant whether person A enjoyed it afterwards.

    It was initiated through rape.

    Example

    Your friend wants to go bungee jumping and you say no.
    Your friend forcefully attaches the equipment and pushes you off the bridge.
    Afterwards you found it was actually fun and you liked it.

    The point here is that you were forced instead of being allowed to decide yourself.
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    (Original post by EC)
    Yes, I do think that in this case person A didn't really take the lack of consent as harmful, considering that A wanted to continue the relationship with B afterwards which implies that A didn't see the wrong in it, but maybe A's judgment wasn't clear enough and rather indecisive.
    Well person B is still a rapist but person A is the one with the choice to prosecute or not.

    I knew a guy who hit his mother a few times. Now i made an effort not to see him for several years however his mother forgave him and never prosecuted him. The fact that the law may have agreed with me did not override the fact that it was ultimately the responsibility of the agents involved to deem this acceptable or not acceptable behaviour in their relationship.
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    (Original post by 999tigger)
    Why would you be surprised that some people are ignorant and that some would find it acceptable?
    People found forced sexual intercourse was acceptable if they didn't physically fight back in order to defend themselves.

    "Respondents in Romania and Hungary were consistently among the most likely to say each situation may be a justification for sex without consent, while those in Sweden and Spain were consistently among the least likely to say so."

    Also, 70% in Europe are aware that it is common in their country but rather ignore it, thinking it's exaggerated.

    I was quite surprised that most people know it happens but choose not to question it.
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    (Original post by Boredomstrikes)
    Chances are that if you're asking the question 'is it rape if...' it's rape.
    Yeah was gonna post this word for word so I'll add this onto it.

    Anyway yeah it is. What you want to do about it afterwards is up to the person who was raped if they made up with the other person after (just like if you were beat up or beat up by somebody and made up with it), however it is a clear case of rape and punishable by law.
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    surely rape comes down to how the person sees it. if person A does not see it as rape and enjoyed it as much as person B then cant one just classify this as an unhealthy relationship or one that enjoys kinkyness.
    but of course if we are strictly speaking legal matters person A could take person B to court for sexual assault.
    i guess this is more of a philosophical question and the answer depends where you're standing in the argument, if you believe under the law it is classified as rape or if you believe in modern terms it is considered as kinky/somewhat sexually unusual
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    (Original post by EC)
    People found forced sexual intercourse was acceptable if they didn't physically fight back in order to defend themselves.

    "Respondents in Romania and Hungary were consistently among the most likely to say each situation may be a justification for sex without consent, while those in Sweden and Spain were consistently among the least likely to say so."

    Also, 70% in Europe are aware that it is common in their country but rather ignore it, thinking it's exaggerated.

    I was quite surprised that most people know it happens but choose not to question it.
    Swedish cucks
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    (Original post by EC)
    I don't find it just as easy to say it's rape as you do apparently.
    Think of it another way.. what if person A did not enjoy the act at any point. At what point did it move from an act which could be cast aside due to enjoying dominance ect.. to one which you would prosecute for.

    Since its too risky for men to get halfway through and then make sure you started to enjoy it, the law exists at the point of entry. Hence it is rape but in the same way as drunk sex i suppose.
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    (Original post by EC)
    "Person A breaks up with Person B.

    Person B does not allow Person A to leave, which escalates into Person B physically restraining Person A.

    Person B begins to grope and then initiates sex with Person A. Person A does fight back and tell Person B to stop. This goes on for a while.

    Near the end of the act, Person A realizes they're enjoying some aspect of what is happening. Assume it's unknown to Person A exactly what they're feeling as it is happening, and feel free to conjecture on it.

    At the end of the act, Person A and Person B make up and remain together.

    Person A doesn't suffer through the feelings of betrayal of their trust, even though they did intend to end the relationship and did mean it when they asked Person B to stop. Even though Person B used physical coercion that Person A objected to at the moment that it happened--holding them down, pulling them by their hair, biting, face slapping--Person A looks back on the act specifically (that is to say, Person A is looking at this specific event and not just at the acts if they were to happen between two consenting adults) and feels aroused. Person A doesn't feel anger toward Person B for it." (this is a hypothetical situation taken from another site)

    -> one of the replies: "Both any physical response that would suggest enjoyment and any feeling of attachment can all happen with sex itself due to over flow of hormones and oxytocin, the bonding hormone. This is how many kidnapper rapists trap their victims and confuse them. The person may not feel anger or anything towards their rapist if they had a prior relationship. That combined with the hormone overflows can cause a false sense of attachment."

    Would you consider this rape? Why/why not?
    I think probably 70% of girls I've been with expressed they're into that, or asked me to do that to them. Especially my most recent ex gf. Loads of girls just wanna be abused in the bedroom in my experience lmao.

    It could be something they do all the time and the BF wanted to give her a super rough ****ing cus its what she likes and it'l stop them breaking up.
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    I love how some of you lot are automatically calling person A (the victim) a girl and person B (the rapist) a guy. Loool.


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    (Original post by Kravence)
    I don't think it's relevant whether person A enjoyed it afterwards.

    It was initiated through rape.

    Example

    Your friend wants to go bungee jumping and you say no.
    Your friend forcefully attaches the equipment and pushes you off the bridge.
    Afterwards you found it was actually fun and you liked it.

    The point here is that you were forced instead of being allowed to decide yourself.
    Well yes, but your example could be quite relatable to a parent who pushes their children in the pool in order to encourage them to swim, even if they might cry and be afraid. And that wouldn't be against the law, but I get what you're trying to say. Your decision wasn't your own after all.
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    Person B had the intention of raping person A. Person A probably just likes BDSM..
 
 
 
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