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I am a completely different person to who I used to be Watch

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    I was just looking back through old pics on facebook from my school days and it kind of hit me like a ton of bricks and I had a mini freak out. Throughout my whole school life I was always the quiet one who never spoke. I didn't have many friends because I was so shy. Right up until the end of 6th form. I really don't know what happened but as soon as I left school and went on a gap year and I decided, I guess, to not be that way any more, it was such a hindrance. I used to be SO insecure about my personality, that's why I didn't speak. I used to wish every day I was normal and the "Why are you so quiet?" question was something I faced (and hated) all the time!
    Now I'm almost finished university and I am really confident, I do still feel awkward or nervous sometimes but that's normal (and no one knows unless I tell them). My best friend even says she envies me for how confident I am and I don't worry about speaking to anyone and social situations don't faze me (baring in mind she was a "popular girl" at school, complete opposite to me!). I never even thought about it before, how different I am, but seeing those pictures of the little mouse I used to be really brought it home. I'm the person my former self wished she could be but never thought she could. It's so so crazy.
    I don't see anyone from school ever (like I said I didn't have many friends) but I wonder what they would think if I bumped into them, if they even remembered me at all.

    Sorry I don't know if this post will be of interest to anyone I just kind of freaked out after looking at my pictures. Weird feeling.
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    Good for you

    Glad everything's going well and you've become a more confident person :yep:

    :five:
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I was just looking back through old pics on facebook from my school days and it kind of hit me like a ton of bricks and I had a mini freak out. Throughout my whole school life I was always the quiet one who never spoke. I didn't have many friends because I was so shy. Right up until the end of 6th form. I really don't know what happened but as soon as I left school and went on a gap year and I decided, I guess, to not be that way any more, it was such a hindrance. I used to be SO insecure about my personality, that's why I didn't speak. I used to wish every day I was normal and the "Why are you so quiet?" question was something I faced (and hated) all the time!
    Now I'm almost finished university and I am really confident, I do still feel awkward or nervous sometimes but that's normal (and no one knows unless I tell them). My best friend even says she envies me for how confident I am and I don't worry about speaking to anyone and social situations don't faze me (baring in mind she was a "popular girl" at school, complete opposite to me!). I never even thought about it before, how different I am, but seeing those pictures of the little mouse I used to be really brought it home. I'm the person my former self wished she could be but never thought she could. It's so so crazy.
    I don't see anyone from school ever (like I said I didn't have many friends) but I wonder what they would think if I bumped into them, if they even remembered me at all.

    Sorry I don't know if this post will be of interest to anyone I just kind of freaked out after looking at my pictures. Weird feeling.
    I can relate, I'm a different person to how I was even a year ago and honestly it's a normal thing. Both university and sixth form are always places where people change, it's where you meet people like you but also you're surrounded by so many people. I don't speak to many of my old school friends and don't wish to, yes I may seem like a ***** now for letting go of my friends but they were all so toxic.

    It's a crazy feeling but it's completely normal
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    That's good

    Same except I'm the complete opposite.
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    (Original post by saraxh)
    That's good

    Same except I'm the complete opposite.
    Do you feel happy about it? Why do you think that happened? Cos obviously for me the driving force was being fed up with myself and how I was.
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    (Original post by Rhythmical)
    I can relate, I'm a different person to how I was even a year ago and honestly it's a normal thing. Both university and sixth form are always places where people change, it's where you meet people like you but also you're surrounded by so many people. I don't speak to many of my old school friends and don't wish to, yes I may seem like a ***** now for letting go of my friends but they were all so toxic.

    It's a crazy feeling but it's completely normal

    I think it's probably been like a gradual change up to this moment, but now I feel so far removed from that person I was until 5 years that it just kind of hit me when I saw the photos.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Do you feel happy about it? Why do you think that happened? Cos obviously for me the driving force was being fed up with myself and how I was.
    Hell no I don't. I use to go out careless about how I looked. Started comparing myself to people. I'm actually my worst critic.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I think it's probably been like a gradual change up to this moment, but now I feel so far removed from that person I was until 5 years that it just kind of hit me when I saw the photos.
    It happens, I was very naive five years ago and would be judgemental about what people did, only to realise I'd do the same as what I'd discourage doing several years later.
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    (Original post by saraxh)
    Hell no I don't. I use to go out careless about how I looked. Started comparing myself to people. I'm actually my worst critic.
    So you think it's about how you look?
    I see what you mean. I also really care about how I look and I'm only recently realising that I think it's because when I was younger I thought I had no personality and thought I couldn't change that, so I used to be obsessed with how I looked because it was the only thing people could see (I never spoke)... and now I still care about how I look quite a lot, maybe more than I should.

    It really shouldn't matter, I'm personally getting to the stage where I hate both giving and receiving physical compliments, but if that's you in your prof pic then you are beautiful, you shouldn't let it hold you back. I think everyone is their own worst critic.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So you think it's about how you look?
    I see what you mean. I also really care about how I look and I'm only recently realising that I think it's because when I was younger I thought I had no personality and thought I couldn't change that, so I used to be obsessed with how I looked because it was the only thing people could see (I never spoke)... and now I still care about how I look quite a lot, maybe more than I should.

    It really shouldn't matter, I'm personally getting to the stage where I hate both giving and receiving physical compliments, but if that's you in your prof pic then you are beautiful, you shouldn't let it hold you back. I think everyone is their own worst critic.
    Yeah, it's always been that. The bad thing is I know I wont be happy/satisfied until I get what I want to get if you know what I mean. I mean I do get compliments I appreciate them.

    No, it's Ariana Grande.
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    Good for you, just try not to leave old friends behind.
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    I totally know the feeling!! In High School I was known as the nerd (and I was obese) and I felt like I had to live up to that.

    In AS I didn't know anyone in my classes (surprisingly as the vast majority of my school went to my college) and so I had to make new friends. This made me a much more confident person.

    Now in A2 I am a healthy weight, confident and feel much better about myself, even though I still have the same friends from high school. 3 of the people I have made friends with at college are so special to me and have changed me for the better and I know they're friends for life
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    Can't wait until this happens to me
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    (Original post by ions)
    Can't wait until this happens to me
    You do have to make it happen though, you can't just be passive, but a change of scenery is always helpful.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I was just looking back through old pics on facebook from my school days and it kind of hit me like a ton of bricks and I had a mini freak out. Throughout my whole school life I was always the quiet one who never spoke. I didn't have many friends because I was so shy. Right up until the end of 6th form. I really don't know what happened but as soon as I left school and went on a gap year and I decided, I guess, to not be that way any more, it was such a hindrance. I used to be SO insecure about my personality, that's why I didn't speak. I used to wish every day I was normal and the "Why are you so quiet?" question was something I faced (and hated) all the time!
    Now I'm almost finished university and I am really confident, I do still feel awkward or nervous sometimes but that's normal (and no one knows unless I tell them). My best friend even says she envies me for how confident I am and I don't worry about speaking to anyone and social situations don't faze me (baring in mind she was a "popular girl" at school, complete opposite to me!). I never even thought about it before, how different I am, but seeing those pictures of the little mouse I used to be really brought it home. I'm the person my former self wished she could be but never thought she could. It's so so crazy.
    I don't see anyone from school ever (like I said I didn't have many friends) but I wonder what they would think if I bumped into them, if they even remembered me at all.

    Sorry I don't know if this post will be of interest to anyone I just kind of freaked out after looking at my pictures. Weird feeling.
    OP Congrats! :five:
    I feel the same as you did, very frustrated by how shy I can be when I know I'm not a bad person. I'm considering taking a gap year too, do you recommend it? Did you do anything interesting in that year?
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    (Original post by saraxh)
    Yeah, it's always been that. The bad thing is I know I wont be happy/satisfied until I get what I want to get if you know what I mean. I mean I do get compliments I appreciate them.

    No, it's Ariana Grande.
    Why do you let appearance hold you back from friendships though?
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    That's called growing up. People change. Those that don't are normally the ones in trouble.
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      Happy for you OP. :yes: It is kind of a given that you won't be exactly the same person year to year. I feel like I'm different to how I was even six months ago.
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      (Original post by Shadow Hunters)
      OP Congrats! :five:
      I feel the same as you did, very frustrated by how shy I can be when I know I'm not a bad person. I'm considering taking a gap year too, do you recommend it? Did you do anything interesting in that year?
      I still don't really know why I was that shy and now I don't really understand how I could be, it's a shame because now I actually find it very hard to talk to shy people... I think for me it was mainly insecurities about personality, but everyone is different.

      Yes, I definitely recommend a gap year! Especially if you do something interesting. I'm not sure I'd recommend it if you're just going to stay in the place you grew up and work/do nothing for the whole year. I personally worked abroad for the year. It pushed me really out of my comfort zone I guess, and cost me nothing. I think it'd be cool also to maybe work at home for 6/7 months to save money then go travelling. OR a ski/snowboard season costs nothing either, you break even. My friend even saved a grand doing it then went travelling. There's lots of possibilities I would 100% always recommend a gap year, especially if you feel like you need to grow in a certain way before university. Honestly I think my life would be so different (for the worse) if I had started uni straight after school.
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      This happened to me in over the summer holidays when I finally left high school after five years of bullying!
      Thing that sucked though was that my friend told me I ruined our friendship dynamic now....which was quite rude because we were only "good friends" when I was the one that was bullied by the whole year and was really quiet. Now that I can speak up for myself and don't tolerate the constant digs and all, (even from our friendship group), we're not that close anymore. I do try to be friends with everyone of them, but its awkward now for some reason because I'm confident now and can talk to people in sixth form.
      Last year in highschool, they all told me I'll struggle in sixth form and that I would have no friends and all. Now, I have the most friends and they all have made none, except each other or my friends that I introduced to them (who they aren't really friends with at all) And one of them even told me that they were really jealous and all at how much I've grown. So yeah....they did try to put me down and say that I was neglecting them and not being friends with them wen really, and they did admit, that they were jealous at me progressing and now being better than them.
     
     
     
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