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My friend wants to do same degree at same uni as I desire, what should I do? Watch

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    (Original post by PeetaRJ)
    I plan to do Biological Sciences or Biochemistry at Imperial. My friend also wants to do Biochemistry at Imperial (if he feels his grades aren't good enough for Medicine).
    I am predicted better grades than him and have better GCSEs and better potential. I am also far ahead of him extra curricular wise. He wants me to bring him into my extra curricular activities relating to my desired courses. I do not what to do because he is my good friend of 6 years but I see him as competition to the already limited places for the courses that are available worldwide so would it be right to not help his chances? What should I do?

    Edit: We're both in Year 12. I study Biology, Chemistry, Physics and Maths, and him the same but WITHOUT Maths.
    Omg you are such an *******.
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    (Original post by PeetaRJ)
    Posted from TSR Mobile

    Fair enough
    your quotes aren't even working... Also your the one crying to TSR for advice
    • #3
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Honestly, do whatever you fee like doing. If you do not want to bring him along to your subject-related extracurriculars, do not do it. If you want to, do it. In fact, you can choose not to even mention any subject-related extracurriculars you know about. I know it is tempting to mention all the amazing extracurriculars you do (I did so many extracurriculars that I understand the feeling perfectly), but not speaking about them is very effective in keeping your competitors away, in case that is what you are after.

    I was in a kind of similar situation last year. This person whom I met in my politics class and whom I was kind of friends with wanted to study politics or something related to politics, like me. I did tell her about almost everything I knew that might help her application (Model United Nations, books, etc), but I did not mention the most important thing available, which was work experience with our MP; I did mine in the May of my AS year and by the time she knew about it, it was more or less too late for her to do work experience with our MP in time for her UCAS application. She never asked in the first place. To be sincere, I might even have told her if she just asked.

    So, if your friend does not ask, you do not have to tell them. You can choose to omit several things or not say anything at all if they do.

    You are your own person. Ten years from now, chances are you will not even speak with your friend anymore and that whether you took him along to your extracurriculars or not will not matter at all.

    That classmate and I were not applying to the same course and university, however, nor were we good friends. Were she a real competitor for my dream course, I might not have told her anything, so I can understand why you would not tell your friend anything in this situation, and will not condemn you no matter what you choose to do.

    Then again, if your friend is as inferior to you as you say, I would not worry about him being the competition. Imperial is a very competitive university, so if you do as well as you would like and your friend does not do as well, you will almost definitely get in while your friend may or may not get in.

    TL;DR: Do whatever you want and say as much or as little as you want about relevant extracurriculars; it will not matter a lot in the end.
    feel*, not fee

    Blame autocorrect. Sorry if there are any other typos.
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    I've experienced this situation & there is strong conflict of interest:

    1) I'm a good friend & should help him/her
    2) I desperately want to get to the uni, and he/she is competition.

    Someone asked me to help them and I thought about it and gave them my honest answer:

    I'd gladly help the person if I hadn't applied for the same thing.

    But since I have applied, I can't help the other person get in, and ruin my own chances. But at same time, I really want the other person to get in, because I value the friendship. The best thing to do to resolve this dilemma is for the both of us to do our own revision/ prep work separately.

    But i wouldn't deliberately sabotage the other person's chances after agreeing to help them. That's low.
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    Shouldn't you be happy you'l be able to see each other at uni? lol
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    Omg please chill out I think it is so sad that you are under the kind of pressures to be feeling this way at 17/18!

    Anyway, getting in to Imperial for Life Sciences is waay easier than you think it is. A lot of people in my cohort (including myself) didn't even get the required grades and they still let us in lol and I definitely had no particularly relevant or glowing extra-curriculars to brag about! The course was undersubscribed and places even ended up being offered through adjustment *gasp* .

    Collaboration is a massive part of science and the fact that you are showing such a negative attitude to sharing knowledge and experiences with another aspiring scientist in the interest of self-gain isn't nice. Think you should chill and re-evaluate things
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    (Original post by PeetaRJ)
    Posted from TSR Mobile

    I can't argue with that, I was a good friend but I feel like I've been putting others first for a long time and I really want this.
    Wow... him applying and getting a place has no impact on you, you are competing with hundreds or even thousands of other applicants so the chance of a situation arising where the place is between the two of you is incredibly small. If you were as smart as you think you'd see that.

    Negatively effecting his chances of succeeding not only makes you a bad friend, but a bad person as well. Focus on improving yourself instead of bringing others down.
    • #4
    #4

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    (Original post by PeetaRJ)
    I plan to do Biological Sciences or Biochemistry at Imperial. My friend also wants to do Biochemistry at Imperial (if he feels his grades aren't good enough for Medicine).
    I am predicted better grades than him and have better GCSEs and better potential. I am also far ahead of him extra curricular wise. He wants me to bring him into my extra curricular activities relating to my desired courses. I do not what to do because he is my good friend of 6 years but I see him as competition to the already limited places for the courses that are available worldwide so would it be right to not help his chances? What should I do?

    Edit: We're both in Year 12. I study Biology, Chemistry, Physics and Maths, and him the same but WITHOUT Maths.
    Sometimes I am glad I am way too old for these childish things! You honestly view your friend as a competitor for a university where thousands of other strangers are also applying to?

    I cannot!
 
 
 
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