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My guy friend is a hypocrite, feel BETRAYED :(

He always used to tease me and make fun of me. He'd make jokes about the way I look as well as other things. Now I've found out he wants to have sex with me. And he's begging it too. Now I wouldn't have minded seeing him if he had told me upfront that he found me attractive. This is ridiculous. I don't know why but I feel really hurt. I do like him (probably more in a friendly way) but wouldn't have minded something more. I now just feel betrayed. What was the point in him acting like he had 0 attraction towards me. Yesterday he said he imagined me naked... I don't know how to react.

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Bro zone him into the netherworld, that'll teach him
Tell him to sling his hook. He can't make fun of you and then expect some sort of reward. He sound like a horny teenage boy who feels he's entitled to have your body just because you're friends.
Original post by Anonymous
He always used to tease me and make fun of me. He'd make jokes about the way I look as well as other things. Now I've found out he wants to have sex with me. And he's begging it too. Now I wouldn't have minded seeing him if he had told me upfront that he found me attractive. This is ridiculous. I don't know why but I feel really hurt. I do like him (probably more in a friendly way) but wouldn't have minded something more. I now just feel betrayed. What was the point in him acting like he had 0 attraction towards me. Yesterday he said he imagined me naked... I don't know how to react.


He's a lot of hormones. It was teasing because he wasnt mature enough to tell you that he liked you (he may not). Dont confuse wanting to sleep with you with feelings of affection. Not sure why you would feel betrayed, that sounds like a waste of time. Some biys are desperate for sex and they arent choosy.
I've had this happen to me twice with guys who were supposedly "friends". It's not exactly fair
Reply 5
Original post by The Giddy Goblin
Bro zone him into the netherworld, that'll teach him

I would never want to intentionally hurt him. I'm just really upset and disappointed.
He is a good guy and he makes it clear that hes joking when he does make fun of me, but you know it still hurts? Because he does it quite a lot
Original post by CarysJSLewis
Tell him to sling his hook. He can't make fun of you and then expect some sort of reward. He sound like a horny teenage boy who feels he's entitled to have your body just because you're friends.

I don't know what to do anymore. I feel so betrayed i thought me and him could've been really close. :frown:
Kind of put me off becoming friends with guys all together. I do understand what you're saying though
Reply 7
Yeah I don't even know what I'm doing now. I've been trying to avoid him. So far it has worked but I see him a lot in university. We do the same course. I skipped a couple of seminars to avoid him.
Original post by 999tigger
He's a lot of hormones. It was teasing because he wasnt mature enough to tell you that he liked you (he may not). Dont confuse wanting to sleep with you with feelings of affection. Not sure why you would feel betrayed, that sounds like a waste of time. Some biys are desperate for sex and they arent choosy.
I felt like whenever he was teasing me he was just doing it to put me down because he thought he couldn't have me or something.
Yeah I thought he cared for me a little at least since we're friends. :frown: I guess I was wrong. I don't even know what I did honestly to make him view me like that.
Original post by Anonymous
I skipped a couple of seminars to avoid him.


You shouldn't have to do this. Go to your seminars, and blank the **** out of him. Who cares if it hurts him, he crossed a line, he should deal with the consequences.
Original post by Anonymous
Yeah I don't even know what I'm doing now. I've been trying to avoid him. So far it has worked but I see him a lot in university. We do the same course. I skipped a couple of seminars to avoid him.
I felt like whenever he was teasing me he was just doing it to put me down because he thought he couldn't have me or something.
Yeah I thought he cared for me a little at least since we're friends. :frown: I guess I was wrong. I don't even know what I did honestly to make him view me like that.


He's mixed up or just thinking with his willy.No need to get sad or waste time worrying. Kisy dont sleep with him and find someone you cna have a normal relationship with. My suspicion is that he hasnt had many gfs.
Original post by CarysJSLewis
You shouldn't have to do this. Go to your seminars, and blank the **** out of him. Who cares if it hurts him, he crossed a line, he should deal with the consequences.

Alright I'm just going to try blank him. I know that isn't going to go down too well. The last time I forgot to say hi to him he had a massive go at me the next day saying I don't care for him and stuff.
Original post by 999tigger
He's mixed up or just thinking with his willy.No need to get sad or waste time worrying. Kisy dont sleep with him and find someone you cna have a normal relationship with. My suspicion is that he hasnt had many gfs.


Its easy to say don't get sad but I really cared about him and I still do. Like I get worried sick on the slightest thing that happens to him. I feel like **** for even giving a crap about him. Yeah I can tell he has a lack of experience with girls. Not hard to figure that out. :frown:
Original post by Anonymous


Its easy to say don't get sad but I really cared about him and I still do. Like I get worried sick on the slightest thing that happens to him. I feel like **** for even giving a crap about him. Yeah I can tell he has a lack of experience with girls. Not hard to figure that out. :frown:


The diffculty you have is he is thinking with his willy, so you cant be sure what is going on as he wont know properly himself. He wont be reliable, so if you like him and wnat a relationship its a danger becayse he could say the right things, but still just want to sleep with you anyway. Umo find someone else, but tell him youd rather just stay friends.
Ditch him. Obviously.
Original post by 999tigger
The diffculty you have is he is thinking with his willy, so you cant be sure what is going on as he wont know properly himself. He wont be reliable, so if you like him and wnat a relationship its a danger becayse he could say the right things, but still just want to sleep with you anyway. Umo find someone else, but tell him youd rather just stay friends.

I don't thinking the just friends part is going to work anymore, if I'm honest. He's just going to try and make me sleeping with him somehow. All I can do now is just avoid him. And see what he has to say when I do avoid him. :frown: Or maybe he'll just ignore back and I won't have to face him again.
Yeah just blank him from now on and hope he gets the hint. If he tries to speak to you somehow just tell him he made you feel like crap and you cared for him and all that. He should know he messed with you.
Original post by Anonymous
I don't thinking the just friends part is going to work anymore, if I'm honest. He's just going to try and make me sleeping with him somehow. All I can do now is just avoid him. And see what he has to say when I do avoid him. :frown: Or maybe he'll just ignore back and I won't have to face him again.


No to think badly of him but his priority seems to be sex from what you right. he probably wont switch off, so just keep him at a distance. No need to fall out.
I agree with the above poster, I feel everyone else has jumped to conclusions.
His priority does seem to be sex, but that doesn't automatically make him a jerk.

OP, did you tell him that his teasing was hurtful to you? If not then he may not have even realised it, and it may have even been a way of him communicating that he actually likes you (which would indicate a lack of maturity, but some people show it by teasing nevertheless). I get the feeling that you haven't communicated this to him, though I could be wrong.
If you have told him, how did he react? Did he take your feelings into consideration or belittle and dismiss them? Did he stop saying hurtful things? This would be the actual determining factor of him being an insensitive idiot or not.

You said he's a nice guy and that he has little experience with girls, so perhaps it's just miscommunication.
Original post by LauraMayden1
I agree with the above poster, I feel everyone else has jumped to conclusions.
His priority does seem to be sex, but that doesn't automatically make him a jerk.

OP, did you tell him that his teasing was hurtful to you? If not then he may not have even realised it, and it may have even been a way of him communicating that he actually likes you (which would indicate a lack of maturity, but some people show it by teasing nevertheless). I get the feeling that you haven't communicated this to him, though I could be wrong.
If you have told him, how did he react? Did he take your feelings into consideration or belittle and dismiss them? Did he stop saying hurtful things? This would be the actual determining factor of him being an insensitive idiot or not.

You said he's a nice guy and that he has little experience with girls, so perhaps it's just miscommunication.


He IS a nice guy and I'm not going to start saying he's a complete ******** because he isn't. You're right I didn't tell him his teasing was hurtful. I thought he probably must've realised I didn't like it when I got annoyed at him for doing it. I don't think he meant to hurt me. You're right with that though, I should've outright told him to stop it because I know he would have done so had I said so. :frown: The thing is that this one time he only seemed to tease me and then praised this other girl, saying she's really good at this and that whilst I'm not. Obviously I found that hurtful. He said this when the girl was there, It seems that other than a couple of flings maybe, he hasn't had any real relationship with a girl or had experience with them romantically. I am confused about whether to blank him/confront him or what else to do? Perhaps I should just continue being friends? What do you suggest?
Tell him how you feel. Instead of second guessing its better to just find out what he thinks.
Talk to him about how you feel.

Just to be clear, do you not want anything with him at all? Do you only view him as a friend? You're not interested in being with him at all?

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