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My guy friend is a hypocrite, feel BETRAYED :( Watch

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    (Original post by LauraMayden1)
    I agree with the above poster, I feel everyone else has jumped to conclusions.
    His priority does seem to be sex, but that doesn't automatically make him a jerk.

    OP, did you tell him that his teasing was hurtful to you? If not then he may not have even realised it, and it may have even been a way of him communicating that he actually likes you (which would indicate a lack of maturity, but some people show it by teasing nevertheless). I get the feeling that you haven't communicated this to him, though I could be wrong.
    If you have told him, how did he react? Did he take your feelings into consideration or belittle and dismiss them? Did he stop saying hurtful things? This would be the actual determining factor of him being an insensitive idiot or not.

    You said he's a nice guy and that he has little experience with girls, so perhaps it's just miscommunication.
    He IS a nice guy and I'm not going to start saying he's a complete ******** because he isn't. You're right I didn't tell him his teasing was hurtful. I thought he probably must've realised I didn't like it when I got annoyed at him for doing it. I don't think he meant to hurt me. You're right with that though, I should've outright told him to stop it because I know he would have done so had I said so. The thing is that this one time he only seemed to tease me and then praised this other girl, saying she's really good at this and that whilst I'm not. Obviously I found that hurtful. He said this when the girl was there, It seems that other than a couple of flings maybe, he hasn't had any real relationship with a girl or had experience with them romantically. I am confused about whether to blank him/confront him or what else to do? Perhaps I should just continue being friends? What do you suggest?
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    Tell him how you feel. Instead of second guessing its better to just find out what he thinks.
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    Talk to him about how you feel.

    Just to be clear, do you not want anything with him at all? Do you only view him as a friend? You're not interested in being with him at all?
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    (Original post by YGEntertainment)
    Tell him how you feel. Instead of second guessing its better to just find out what he thinks.
    Alright I will try to talk to him
    (Original post by Spongebob'sPants)
    Talk to him about how you feel.

    Just to be clear, do you not want anything with him at all? Do you only view him as a friend? You're not interested in being with him at all?
    I find him attractive. I wouldn't have minded something with him. It's just weird now I know he wants sex.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Alright I will try to talk to him

    I find him attractive. I wouldn't have minded something with him. It's just weird now I know he wants sex.
    It doesnt have to be the case that he ONLY wants sex with you though? He might actually care about you?

    The fact he had a go at you for not saying hi suggests he might actually view you as someone close, and was upset cos he felt you didnt care enough to say hi?
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    (Original post by Spongebob'sPants)
    It doesnt have to be the case that he ONLY wants sex with you though? He might actually care about you?

    The fact he had a go at you for not saying hi suggests he might actually view you as someone close, and was upset cos he felt you didnt care enough to say hi?
    I know that he cares about me because he's always asking how I feel and if im okay and stuff. It's just odd because I feel like I've been lied to. He could've just told me from the start that he found me attractive and would like something with me. I always found him to be quite attractive, so what did he have to lose by asking. He knows I care about him. I think he knows. He just said sorry for what he said yesterday and asked if I was upset.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I know that he cares about me because he's always asking how I feel and if im okay and stuff. It's just odd because I feel like I've been lied to. He could've just told me from the start that he found me attractive and would like something with me. I always found him to be quite attractive, so what did he have to lose by asking. He knows I care about him. I think he knows. He just said sorry for what he said yesterday and asked if I was upset.
    He was clearly scared of revealing his feelings, in fear of rejection, and possibly losing your friendship as a result?

    When you're younger, you care about these things.

    Yes, he should have told you early on, but don't hold that against him.

    If you're attracted to him, hes a good guy at heart, and he seemingly is into you, then you should explore that.
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    (Original post by Spongebob'sPants)
    He was clearly scared of revealing his feelings, in fear of rejection, and possibly losing your friendship as a result?

    When you're younger, you care about these things.

    Yes, he should have told you early on, but don't hold that against him.

    If you're attracted to him, hes a good guy at heart, and he seemingly is into you, then you should explore that.
    Thanks a lot. I think that apart from this, he is so amazing. Honestly I haven't come across a more humble and giving guy. I suppose that's why I am disappointed. To me he just sounds horny. I don't believe that he has any deeper feelings towards me but I will see what the future holds.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    He always used to tease me and make fun of me. He'd make jokes about the way I look as well as other things. Now I've found out he wants to have sex with me. And he's begging it too. Now I wouldn't have minded seeing him if he had told me upfront that he found me attractive. This is ridiculous. I don't know why but I feel really hurt. I do like him (probably more in a friendly way) but wouldn't have minded something more. I now just feel betrayed. What was the point in him acting like he had 0 attraction towards me. Yesterday he said he imagined me naked... I don't know how to react.
    It seems to me like he used to have a girlfriend or FWB that he could get sex relief from but she just left him so he wants to try his luck with you... On the bright side, the power is now in your hands so if you want to manipulate him (like he's trying with you) then by all means do so.... You can get away with anything in this situation, have fun
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    He IS a nice guy and I'm not going to start saying he's a complete ******** because he isn't. You're right I didn't tell him his teasing was hurtful. I thought he probably must've realised I didn't like it when I got annoyed at him for doing it. I don't think he meant to hurt me. You're right with that though, I should've outright told him to stop it because I know he would have done so had I said so. The thing is that this one time he only seemed to tease me and then praised this other girl, saying she's really good at this and that whilst I'm not. Obviously I found that hurtful. He said this when the girl was there, It seems that other than a couple of flings maybe, he hasn't had any real relationship with a girl or had experience with them romantically. I am confused about whether to blank him/confront him or what else to do? Perhaps I should just continue being friends? What do you suggest?
    What other posters have said; talk to him, tell him how you feel, how you felt and how he made you feel. I'm sure you'll be able to gauge what kind of a person he is and what he's after from his response, partially at least.
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    He could still be teasing you on a **** move level </3 Take care! ^^
 
 
 
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