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    Hi. I know this sounds very pathetic and teenage-like but I'm really quite concerned about this. I'd be 27 by the time I start the Architecture degree in September but I'm worried about what it means for my relationship. I've read so many horror stories about how the course takes over your whole life. If I wasn't going back to uni I'd probably start thinking about saving up for a place etc with my boyfriend but I actually think this could tear us apart.

    Is there genuinely time to maintain a normal relationship alongside this degree? I'm scared about what I could be giving up to do this.
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    Yes, there is. I have been in a long-distance relationship with my boyfriend for the last 3 years while he does architecture and engineering. We see each other regularly, although this might be slightly less around exams/deadlines.
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    (Original post by ax12)
    Yes, there is. I have been in a long-distance relationship with my boyfriend for the last 3 years while he does architecture and engineering. We see each other regularly, although this might be slightly less around exams/deadlines.
    Thank you. Do you mind me asking how old you both are and what part he's on? (Part I,II,III?). I'd be 30 and my boyfriend 33 by the time I finish only part I, and by then I know I'd want to start thinking about a family and stuff. It's so difficult knowing what to do!
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    (Original post by rhmj)
    Thank you. Do you mind me asking how old you both are and what part he's on? (Part I,II,III?). I'd be 30 and my boyfriend 33 by the time I finish only part I, and by then I know I'd want to start thinking about a family and stuff. It's so difficult knowing what to do!
    We're both 22, he graduates uni this year and will be starting his apprenticeship bit (he's explained the parts to me before but I'm not 100% on which is which still). I still have 2 years left at uni, but he is hoping to find a job closer to where I am next year so we might be able to live together or at least be closer. Then when I graduate he has to go back to uni to do his masters. We've been discussing how it is going to work and I think it'll be a lot of compromise from both of us about where we live etc so we can work around it all!
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    (Original post by ax12)
    We're both 22, he graduates uni this year and will be starting his apprenticeship bit (he's explained the parts to me before but I'm not 100% on which is which still). I still have 2 years left at uni, but he is hoping to find a job closer to where I am next year so we might be able to live together or at least be closer. Then when I graduate he has to go back to uni to do his masters. We've been discussing how it is going to work and I think it'll be a lot of compromise from both of us about where we live etc so we can work around it all!
    I wish I'd have done this at that age- I keep applying and backing out every year cos I'm getting "too old"! But I still just keep finding myself in dead-end jobs that I hate, knowing this is really what I want to do. I think I really am just gonna have to go for it this time, and hopefully we're strong enough like you two that we can work around it! But thanks, it's made me feel a bit better
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    I'd say if you'll both live in the same city still it won't be too bad if you're both understanding. If it means you'll be living in different cities it will be more of a challenge but still doable.

    Although I would question why you're starting it at all so late. Depending on what you're current career is I'd say architecture isn't really rewarding enough for the most part to be worth it and at your age you will probably face discrimination in employment; the best firms in London want to employ your typical over-achiever. And if you're not interested in working for top London firms, why are you doing it? Designing warehouses at a firm based in Leicestershire isn't going to be rewarding.
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    Architecture is so time-consuming because at 18, you don't know how to look after yourself and you want to go drinking and partying all the time and you're incapable of managing time and money. I'm not going to lie, it's a hard and time-consuming degree, but Architecture students spend a lot of their time in studio, but are incredibly inefficient with it there. I mean you can't be completely efficient, the design process kinda needs a bit of that. But undergrad students all stay up til stupid late, but no one turns up in the morning til 10/11. If you're willing to structure your time and days and keep on top of deadlines, doing research and reading for humanities as early as possible etc. you should be absolutely fine. It can be a slog, April/May will be tough but Uni terms are actually pretty short.

    You can do an architecture Part I degree without doing all of the rest of it. There was a guy in my practice who joined as a Part I Assistant and stayed there for 18 years, he now works primarily on the tech side, working as a BIM coordinator type thing. My supervisor (who's an associate at the company) is an architectural technician, I don't think he has a degree.
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    (Original post by mattyh28)
    Architecture is so time-consuming because at 18, you don't know how to look after yourself and you want to go drinking and partying all the time and you're incapable of managing time and money. I'm not going to lie, it's a hard and time-consuming degree, but Architecture students spend a lot of their time in studio, but are incredibly inefficient with it there. I mean you can't be completely efficient, the design process kinda needs a bit of that. But undergrad students all stay up til stupid late, but no one turns up in the morning til 10/11. If you're willing to structure your time and days and keep on top of deadlines, doing research and reading for humanities as early as possible etc. you should be absolutely fine. It can be a slog, April/May will be tough but Uni terms are actually pretty short.

    You can do an architecture Part I degree without doing all of the rest of it. There was a guy in my practice who joined as a Part I Assistant and stayed there for 18 years, he now works primarily on the tech side, working as a BIM coordinator type thing. My supervisor (who's an associate at the company) is an architectural technician, I don't think he has a degree.
    Thank you so much for this. Strangely enough, it comes a day after he dumped me anyway! Sigh :ashamed: But, I needed to hear what you said anyway. I'm very organised and have been getting up at 6am for years with my job with no problem, have also been a teacher which had ridiculous amounts of work but I managed it. So thanks, I'm glad to hear that I can probably do it. (Although the way I'm feeling right now it's the last thing I want to do! :ashamed2:)
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    I started part 1 at 28 and am just finishing my part 2 this month. All I can say is be absolutely sure it's what you want to do as it really is tough, not just the amount of work / time spent on it (basically all your time), but it's also really mentally challenging and a lot of people in 5th year have been struggling with mental health issues. Sounds dramatic but believe me when I say it, in 5/6 years time you'll realise how tough it is to get through.

    I wouldn't change what I've done as I, like you, hated my job and working as a part 1 for 2 years out for a decent London firm made me realise how much I do love it. But it's hard, even once you're finished the job market isn't great at the mo and the hours can be insanely long. As far as your original question goes (I know you said you've since split up but for future reference), imo you cannot sustain any decent relationships while studying part 2 for sure. I hardly see my friends at the moment and I literally wouldn't have time for a bf, everyday and evening is spent working, it's intense. Don't want to put you off but the reality is harsh, especially if you are older and have other life commitments as life goes on, but studio tutors expect your life to be the degree, so juggling family / friends etc is difficult. Good luck if you go for it but please be sure it's what you want!
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    alot of relationships failed in university, its better to live with your partner because I'm pretty sure your time is mostly spent behind a computer screen or bed most of the time.
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    Hi rhmj,

    I started my first year age 27 (just finished my second) and had been with my girlfriend for only a year. I was still stuck at home during my first year which strained my relationship a little due to the amount of work that had to be done. By strained I mean just a lack of time to spend together and I imagine me living with my parents would be roughly the same to living at uni in terms of free time to see my other half. In the summer before my second year I moved in with her and although the workload increased and I spent even more time at the computer or in the studio making models living with her made it so much better! Even if I was trying to hit a deadline or get sheets ready for a crit for the following day she could pop into the room with a cup of tea and we could chat.

    I know this information comes too late but you need to know it is possible! Even more so if you manage to live with that person. I know everyone is different but if they have any concept of hard work (you sound like the person who would look for that quality in a partner) they will understand.

    It doesn't sound like a great time for you at the moment but try and use what has happened as motivation and a pick-me-up! This course opens a lot of doors, not just in architecture. Whatever happens it will only change you for the better. And forget the age thing! If I can survive a group project with people 10 years my senior anyone can!
 
 
 
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