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My Boyfriend keeps going on my snapchat? Watch

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    Originally I gave him my password so he could save our streak whilst I was away (silly I know) I also felt that it was a way for us to put more trust in one another and so since then he has had access to it.

    Once I came back from my holiday I expected him to stop logging on because we started snapping each other again and there was no need for him to go on it.

    (When someone else longs into your snapchat you have to re log in on your own phone)
    and this kept happening so I was quite confused it happened 3 or 4 times and then I eventually just realised it might have been him logging in. I hadn't expected this and so I felt a bit weird asking him but the next time we met up I mentioned it and he shyly said that he had been going on if I didn't reply for a while to see if I was replying to other people.

    I laughed it off and he apologised so I just said "it's okay"

    about three days later I woke up and had to relog into my snapchat again. This time I screenshot the relog in page and asked him if it was him again to which he said yes and admitted that I hadn't replied for a while so he had gone on to see if I was talking to other people. My friend said this was weird but that he was probably just anxious that I was talking to other boys as other boys have tried to talk to me in the past and he knows that. However I have only a few younger male friends and family members on snapchat so I was a bit annoyed that he wouldn't just trust me.

    everytime I ask him if he doesn't trust me he makes out as if its my problem and that I'm overthinking things. I don't understand if I'm being crazy or if this is an invasion of privacy/ lack of trust. I keep trying to communicate with him but he says things like "I know its hard for you not to, but don't overthink things that I do" which is just a tad patronising. He's also started to cut across me in sentences and interrupt things that I say or tell me to "sh" when I'm trying to communicate things to him.

    last night he logged in again and this morning he told me it was because he'd sent me a "cringey" snapchat before bed. I can only imagine this to mirror the snapchats I send him telling him I love him etc. I feel like there's some male ego problems going on here. My last boyfriend was 3 years older than me and constantly belittled me and stopped communicating his feelings. He had massive ego problems and took steroids so this is just giving me slight ptsd over the feelings I've gone through.

    This is his first relationship and I appreciate that a lack of experience and an introverted personality might make him paranoid/insecure/anxious but why can he not just admit that he feels that way? and if he doesn't then why does he keep logging onto my snapchat??

    I messaged him saying can we call and get this over with because I'd like to get on with my day and he went offline. I feel like this lack of communication is going to slowly wear away at me.

    do I stand my ground and tell him that he needs to confront his feelings or produce a valid alternative explanation for his "noseying" or should I just comfort his egoand act like this is ok?

    advice needed
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    Just change your password...


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    Just change your password already.

    simples.
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    Dump him. If he doesn't trust you (he's probably looking at everything you're saying to everyone whenever he likes), what is there? He's an insecure, paranoid idiot who can't handle being in a relationship. I wouldn't want a boyfriend who went through all of my personal stuff to make sure I wasn't up to anything.
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    To be honest it doesn't sound like he's jealous of other guys talking to you, it sounds like he's really suspicious of what you're doing. If you've never done anything to lose his trust then I don't understand why someone would act like this.This was the kind of behaviour I saw in my parents just before they got divorced. I'm not saying you should break up, I don't think it's that serious but you should try to get him to understand you're uncomfortable with him doing this because you feel like he doesn't trust you. If he keeps doing it, then apologising, then doing it again - he's not being sincere when he's apologising to you. The whole point of saying sorry is that you won't do it again! If it continues, I would change my password.
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    (Original post by Daisy230199)
    Originally I gave him my password so he could save our streak whilst I was away (silly I know) I also felt that it was a way for us to put more trust in one another and so since then he has had access to it.

    Once I came back from my holiday I expected him to stop logging on because we started snapping each other again and there was no need for him to go on it.

    (When someone else longs into your snapchat you have to re log in on your own phone)
    and this kept happening so I was quite confused it happened 3 or 4 times and then I eventually just realised it might have been him logging in. I hadn't expected this and so I felt a bit weird asking him but the next time we met up I mentioned it and he shyly said that he had been going on if I didn't reply for a while to see if I was replying to other people.

    I laughed it off and he apologised so I just said "it's okay"

    about three days later I woke up and had to relog into my snapchat again. This time I screenshot the relog in page and asked him if it was him again to which he said yes and admitted that I hadn't replied for a while so he had gone on to see if I was talking to other people. My friend said this was weird but that he was probably just anxious that I was talking to other boys as other boys have tried to talk to me in the past and he knows that. However I have only a few younger male friends and family members on snapchat so I was a bit annoyed that he wouldn't just trust me.

    everytime I ask him if he doesn't trust me he makes out as if its my problem and that I'm overthinking things. I don't understand if I'm being crazy or if this is an invasion of privacy/ lack of trust. I keep trying to communicate with him but he says things like "I know its hard for you not to, but don't overthink things that I do" which is just a tad patronising. He's also started to cut across me in sentences and interrupt things that I say or tell me to "sh" when I'm trying to communicate things to him.

    last night he logged in again and this morning he told me it was because he'd sent me a "cringey" snapchat before bed. I can only imagine this to mirror the snapchats I send him telling him I love him etc. I feel like there's some male ego problems going on here. My last boyfriend was 3 years older than me and constantly belittled me and stopped communicating his feelings. He had massive ego problems and took steroids so this is just giving me slight ptsd over the feelings I've gone through.

    This is his first relationship and I appreciate that a lack of experience and an introverted personality might make him paranoid/insecure/anxious but why can he not just admit that he feels that way? and if he doesn't then why does he keep logging onto my snapchat??

    I messaged him saying can we call and get this over with because I'd like to get on with my day and he went offline. I feel like this lack of communication is going to slowly wear away at me.

    do I stand my ground and tell him that he needs to confront his feelings or produce a valid alternative explanation for his "noseying" or should I just comfort his egoand act like this is ok?

    advice needed
    oh my god that's really not ok! logging on to see if you were replying to other people? What a controlling and insecure boy.

    I would be seriously concerned by this. I definitely wouldn't tell him it's ok and I would change the password and keep an eye out. If he insists it's acceptable behaviour and it's your fault I would honestly dump him as this is a massive red flag for more controlling and manipulative (trying to blame you) behaviour in the future. The problem is you shouldn't HAVE to change your password, he should just not be doing this in the first place without you having to go to lengths to protect your privacy, especially when you have already asked him to stop and he hasn't listened.
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    Cut the guy some slack, in his head he's probably doing nothing wrong. It is intrusive, but if it bothers you this much just change your password and move on. This isn't really that big a deal...
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    Stand your ground. He sounds controlling and insecure.
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    Trust issues
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    Just change your password. He clearly thinks him checking is fine when it's not. If he asks why you changed just tell him you asked him about logging on and go stop but he didn't and there's no reason for him to check.
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    I think he just wants to know what it's like to be a woman and to see all the attention you get. Probably wishes he was one (it can be hard being a man ). The fact you said he's shy makes me think he's not being jealous/controlling, but that he's just curious.
    • TSR Support Team
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    He shouldn't be doing that, I would change your password and tell him it is not ok what he is doing.
 
 
 
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