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Just found out my ex is now dating my best friend :)) AMA Watch

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    (Original post by telepathicnine)
    But I don't get it.

    Why does it hurt them?

    Why can I be friends with this person, but then go out with his/her ex? They're not dating my friend anymore, now I can.
    What am I missing?
    Sorry I don't know how to explain emotions to people who don't understand them... I will try...
    A lot of relationships don't end happily. There is a lot of pain and hurt involved. People don't break up because they're happy in a relationship. If you do break up, your best friend is who supports you and who you turn to and confide in. They probably know everything about the break up. If they then go and pursue a relationship with the person that caused you that pain, knowing that it will probably hurt you, they are not your friend. Especially if they don't ask you first if you would mind or be hurt by it and do it behind your back.

    You can go and do it, sure. But it's a **** thing to do and a sign of a bad character... expect to have no friends.
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    (Original post by _princessxox)
    I have nothing to do except eat ice cream and be miserable so ask me anything lol
    Yeah, someone I know is doing the exact same, but as the boy in the situation. He broke up with a girl and is now linking her best friend and some other girls. Very cocky, wants to be a movie star yet has no talent, overall, he's kind of a dickwad
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    You should probably find someone else, you know, get him back :cookie:

    (Original post by RadicalCentrist)
    Too many snakes about these days I tell you
    :hmmm:
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    (Original post by telepathicnine)
    Huh that kinds makes sense actually!

    But I'm still confused. What if I got rid of the pizza? Then, that best friend would be in everyright to eat the pizza without me feeling sad
    I think if you dump your partner you don't love them at all so you wouldn't really care if your friends dated them. For me anyway.
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    it's always baffled me how ugly people end up in situations that only attractive people experience
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    (Original post by _princessxox)
    if you respect and love someone like my best friend should, then she wouldn't date my ex who she knows i don't want in my life because he hurt me so much.
    when you've been best friends with someone for 6 years and always had their back and you assumed they always had yours, then to your surprise you find out they're going behind your back and lying to your face as well as not staying loyal to you, that's a HUGE betrayal.

    But how is she betraying you? Your ex was unfortunately horrid to you, but maybe she hopes that he'll be nice to her so she decided to date him?
    I mean she's not trying to bring him back into your life?

    Just for the record, I'm not trying to defend your friend. I'm very sorry that this happened to you, and about your ex being abusive,
    it's just honestly I saw it as an opportunity to ask questions and learn about relationships cos I seriously don't get em.
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    (Original post by Moura)
    Sorry I don't know how to explain emotions to people who don't understand them... I will try...
    A lot of relationships don't end happily. There is a lot of pain and hurt involved. People don't break up because they're happy in a relationship. If you do break up, your best friend is who supports you and who you turn to and confide in. They probably know everything about the break up. If they then go and pursue a relationship with the person that caused you that pain, knowing that it will probably hurt you, they are not your friend. Especially if they don't ask you first if you would mind or be hurt by it and do it behind your back.

    You can go and do it, sure. But it's a **** thing to do and a sign of a bad character... expect to have no friends.
    So, could you say... I'm close with my friend, but I can't be close with the ex, but the friend will be close with the ex which means I can't be close with the friend?
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    (Original post by _princessxox)
    I have nothing to do except eat ice cream and be miserable so ask me anything lol
    What a shi**y friend.
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    (Original post by truthspeaka)
    You're never getting into med school. Med students are focused on their studies not sleeping around like sluts.
    i'm not a slut? and i dont sleep around lol
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    (Original post by _princessxox)
    ahaha I love this im sure even the simple minded MIGHT understand this!
    Except its wrong.

    The issue as i see it is not that she went out with your ex, but that she didnt have the courtesy to tell you. You would expect a best friend to do this, considering how it might affect you.
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    (Original post by _princessxox)
    i'm not a slut? and i dont sleep around lol
    Regardless, at your age you should be studying and relaxing not worrying about petty relationship issues. These relationships are completely immature. Say bye to a successful life if you keep on going with this attitude.
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    (Original post by telepathicnine)
    But how is she betraying you? Your ex was unfortunately horrid to you, but maybe she hopes that he'll be nice to her so she decided to date him?
    I mean she's not trying to bring him back into your life?

    Just for the record, I'm not trying to defend your friend. I'm very sorry that this happened to you, and about your ex being abusive,
    it's just honestly I saw it as an opportunity to ask questions and learn about relationships cos I seriously don't get em.
    we ended it but it doesn't mean that she can just take that as an opportunity to get with him, think of it this way, if what she was doing was so innocent why would she go behind my back and lie to me in order to do it, if she was innocent surely she would just be able to tell me to my face that she likes him maybe i would've let her date him after a while if i was completely over him, but the way she went about it, It felt like a stab in the back after seeing the photo
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    (Original post by truthspeaka)
    Regardless, at your age you should be studying and relaxing not worrying about petty relationship issues. These relationships are completely immature. Say bye to a successful life if you keep on going with this attitude.
    i'm sorry but i study everyday, im a straight A student so I don't know where you're getting this from? if i come across like that that's your problem for being judgemental
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    (Original post by 999tigger)
    Except its wrong.

    The issue as i see it is not that she went out with your ex, but that she didnt have the courtesy to tell you. You would expect a best friend to do this, considering how it might affect you.
    but its both, i wouldn't date her exes no matter what, you make sacrifices for friends
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    (Original post by truthspeaka)
    Regardless, at your age you should be studying and relaxing not worrying about petty relationship issues. These relationships are completely immature. Say bye to a successful life if you keep on going with this attitude.
    Shut up
    You're vile if you feel happy putting down someone who's clearly ****ing upset right now.
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    (Original post by _princessxox)
    we ended it but it doesn't mean that she can just take that as an opportunity to get with him, think of it this way, if what she was doing was so innocent why would she go behind my back and lie to me in order to do it, if she was innocent surely she would just be able to tell me to my face that she likes him maybe i would've let her date him after a while if i was completely over him, but the way she went about it, It felt like a stab in the back after seeing the photo

    Ok.

    That makes perfect sense

    So it's not so much the actualy "going-out together" part, it's how she asked him out
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    It happened to me
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    (Original post by Mathemagicien)
    did u just assume his/her/xis/other's sexuality?

    its 2017, not every1 is straight.......!
    That better be a joke xD
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Lol why do you care? Sounds like jealousy/bitterness to me.
    nope, just hurt that my best friend is secretly dating the person i hate most
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    (Original post by BlindingLight)
    Find a hobby. Or get a job.
    i have both of those things but thanks for the concern.
 
 
 
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