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Suffering with panic/anxiety/social anxiety daily: Do I tell friends on my uni course Watch

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    Hi guys, I am 5 months into my University course, and suffering with the problems in the title on a daily basis.

    I am a mature student on a healthcare related course and so far I have not gone out to socialise with friends on my uni course, but I have gone to library a couple of times with the people I would mostly socialise with were it not for my anxiety issues.

    I have always found it difficult being in social groups, I always get paranoid and feel I am being negatively judged, so I tend to endure these situations as best I can and then retreat. I just cant relax with these people or almost anyone to be honest and wish I could. Ive been to a couple of society events and feel the same things happen, it literally feels like no matter what I do, people are not nice/kind/friendly with me, and I know I don't make it easy for myself, but I don't know how to be any different.

    I am considering going for a pint with a couple of them and just saying 'look guys, I want to get it out in the open, I suffer anxiety and find things like this difficult, I really want to improve this area and just wanted to tell you, before it becomes a bigger issue for me than it needs to be'.

    But at the same time I don't know if it could or would backfire.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hi guys, I am 5 months into my University course, and suffering with the problems in the title on a daily basis.

    I am a mature student on a healthcare related course and so far I have not gone out to socialise with friends on my uni course, but I have gone to library a couple of times with the people I would mostly socialise with were it not for my anxiety issues.

    I have always found it difficult being in social groups, I always get paranoid and feel I am being negatively judged, so I tend to endure these situations as best I can and then retreat. I just cant relax with these people or almost anyone to be honest and wish I could. Ive been to a couple of society events and feel the same things happen, it literally feels like no matter what I do, people are not nice/kind/friendly with me, and I know I don't make it easy for myself, but I don't know how to be any different.

    I am considering going for a pint with a couple of them and just saying 'look guys, I want to get it out in the open, I suffer anxiety and find things like this difficult, I really want to improve this area and just wanted to tell you, before it becomes a bigger issue for me than it needs to be'.

    But at the same time I don't know if it could or would backfire.
    I have anxiety as well. SSRI's and cognitive behavioural therapy did me a world of good. Tell your friends; they'll be surprisingly receptive. Social anxiety is fairly common but if you believe literally EVERYONE dislikes you, you need to get some professional help. Good luck!
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    • Thread Starter
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    I know everyone probably thinks I am just be over dramatic, but this is a problem I have suffered the burden with for many years, I am at the point where I just want it to be over one way or the other
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    (Original post by Socratesfam)
    I have anxiety as well. SSRI's and cognitive behavioural therapy did me a world of good. Tell your friends; they'll be surprisingly receptive. Social anxiety is fairly common but if you believe literally EVERYONE dislikes you, you need to get some professional help. Good luck!
    Is that because if i believed it, then I am being delusional? Or that if it's true, then I need help to overcome it?
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    Yes tell them, if they're decent friends, they'll understand and be supportive.
    I was in the same position a few years ago. I didn't tell anyone- I would just leave parties without notice, cancel last minute, not respond to text messages, sometimes avoid them at uni and eventually I disappeared without notice for months on end. It made things awkward, my friends just thought I was weird/ arrogant. I was silently suffering and battling myself.I regret not being open about it.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Is that because if i believed it, then I am being delusional? Or that if it's true, then I need help to overcome it?
    It's very, very unlikely that everyone dislikes you. In fact, if you're as unassuming and insecure as you say, I doubt anyone dislikes you. Most anxieties are unfounded or grossly exaggerated. Ask yourself, why would anyone dislike you, objectively speaking?
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    Tell them. You'll make them feel like you trust them and like you value as friends! Or at least that's what I would think if a friend decided to tell me about their mental health.
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    Yes tell them, if they are good friends, they will be supportive.

    It could be your own perceptions, beliefs or even negative life experiences from the past that is causing you to believe you are negatively judged.

    In social groups, everyone has an equal say. For example, I remember when I was a teenager, the match was over and the lads went to the pub, we sat around in a circle of 6, some people were not talking to me and this is because they did not want to talk to me, despite trying to make the effort.

    Some people will just not want to talk to you and not everyone will like you.

    Relax, don't take yourself seriously (I'm not saying you do), look outside, talk in general (the weather, the sports match, current affairs, what's happening with others), talk to the person next to you.
 
 
 
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