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    Hi everyone,
    I started at Nottingham uni in September and I'm really struggling. I don't live in halls and commute in and from what friends had told me this shouldn't be a problem and you should still be fine. However it's now January and I feel like I've made no proper mates, I met one girl in first term and went out with her and her flat mates once and it was great and was going to stick with them but she dropped out. I've got a friend who I spent time with in uni hours and like a lot but when she goes out she likes dancing with lads and stuff and I have a boyfriend so would end up alone. I don't HATE uni at all but do feel a bit lonely and its kind of spoiling the experience for me. Any tips or just general words of wisdom are welcome
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    I think a silent majority including myself can relate to your situation. I did live in halls for my first year and had a mediocre experience, I was going to live in with my 'flatmates' but decided it was a bad idea, so I just decided to move back home. I'm in my second year and I live about 30 miles away from my Uni.

    I do feel like I spend most of my time in lectures, labs etc alone. I feel like a lot of people I meet don't have a lot in common with apart from we do a similar degree. Also I am much busier in 2nd year so I don't have time to go out drinking or meet up with people the same as last year.

    But how can we ameliorate our situations?.....

    The frank answer is not a tremendous amount - it is just by chance that we meet same minded people, and it is primarily our own effort that needs to be put in to meet new people.

    I find it frustrating how I want to say hello to other people in my lectures but they are already in their group of friends and so I feel like I would be intruding their group
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    Honestly, this is repeated about 800 times, all I can say is maybe join some societies. Or try and ask some course mates if they would like to study together if that' something you wouldn't feel too awkward asking and would enjoy doing.

    I haven't really made any friends I could confidently say I click with either. It's cliched but even when I'm with others, I still feel lonely because I don't bond with them the way i did with the friends I made in sixth form or even secondary school. I still feel like I have to think of what to say next, like our interactions don't feel natural to me but it could all be in my head.

    Since it is still early days, try to focus on your studies mostly and maybe in time things will just fall into place. It's not uncommon for people to make good friends later in the year or second year even, at least so I've been told.
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    (Original post by shaunnaob)
    Hi everyone,
    I started at Nottingham uni in September and I'm really struggling. I don't live in halls and commute in and from what friends had told me this shouldn't be a problem and you should still be fine. However it's now January and I feel like I've made no proper mates, I met one girl in first term and went out with her and her flat mates once and it was great and was going to stick with them but she dropped out. I've got a friend who I spent time with in uni hours and like a lot but when she goes out she likes dancing with lads and stuff and I have a boyfriend so would end up alone. I don't HATE uni at all but do feel a bit lonely and its kind of spoiling the experience for me. Any tips or just general words of wisdom are welcome

    HI, would you be interested in befriending? and making friends in real life. Ive recently put up a thread, for people looking to make real friendships on TSR. Not just online friends but an actual support group. Please get in touch with me
    https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/sho...0#post70678020
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    (Original post by shaunnaob)
    Hi everyone,
    I started at Nottingham uni in September and I'm really struggling. I don't live in halls and commute in and from what friends had told me this shouldn't be a problem and you should still be fine. However it's now January and I feel like I've made no proper mates, I met one girl in first term and went out with her and her flat mates once and it was great and was going to stick with them but she dropped out. I've got a friend who I spent time with in uni hours and like a lot but when she goes out she likes dancing with lads and stuff and I have a boyfriend so would end up alone. I don't HATE uni at all but do feel a bit lonely and its kind of spoiling the experience for me. Any tips or just general words of wisdom are welcome
    Have you considered joining a society or club for something you like or haven't tried before they always want new members and they are usually really friendly and you'll have something in common be it a love of film or playing something like octopush (underwater hockey)


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