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    I'm in my second year of college and I'm doing a Level 3 BTEC in Media. I'm generally a competent and able student and my teacher regards me as "one of the stars of the class". Last year I achieved grades DM and I'm predicted to get DDM at the end of the year. However recently, I've not been working to the best of my ability.

    I've been avoiding my course work. I have about 7 essays/articles to write, amongst other tasks but I have no motivation to do them. Well, wanting to achieve the right grades for university should be my motivation but it's not doing anything. Am I being lazy? What even is the difference between being lazy and lacking motivation? Is one more acceptable than the other? I'm probably just lazy to be honest. I want to do well and go to university but I don't want to do this work. I'm so sick and tired of college, maybe even of education altogether; of life! I'm just tired.

    As the title suggests, none of my teachers notice anything. I hand in assignments late and incomplete but no one seems to notice which sounds like it should be a good thing, but I'm not sure.

    What should I do? Wait it out until the end of the year? Drop out of college? Kill myself?
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    (Original post by NatCx)
    I'm in my second year of college and I'm doing a Level 3 BTEC in Media. I'm generally a competent and able student and my teacher regards me as "one of the stars of the class". Last year I achieved grades DM and I'm predicted to get DDM at the end of the year. However recently, I've not been working to the best of my ability.

    I've been avoiding my course work. I have about 7 essays/articles to write, amongst other tasks but I have no motivation to do them. Well, wanting to achieve the right grades for university should be my motivation but it's not doing anything. Am I being lazy? What even is the difference between being lazy and lacking motivation? Is one more acceptable than the other? I'm probably just lazy to be honest. I want to do well and go to university but I don't want to do this work. I'm so sick and tired of college, maybe even of education altogether; of life! I'm just tired.

    As the title suggests, none of my teachers notice anything. I hand in assignments late and incomplete but no one seems to notice which sounds like it should be a good thing, but I'm not sure.

    What should I do? Wait it out until the end of the year? Drop out of college? Kill myself?
    Definitely throw the last suggestion out of the window.

    It sounds like you have the goals, but you haven't found something you're passionate about yet. There is a difference between wanting to simply go to university and wanting to go to university to study something particular.

    I understand this in a slightly different context; when I recently went through a relationship break up, I lost interest in a lot of the things I really did once like, including maths (strange since it's my degree!). Part of it was due to factors such as becoming depressed coming into play and just the context. That said, I have regained interest in a lot of these things and other, new things too. So I would think that you should consider whether or not it is a plain lack of interest that is demotivating you or some other subtle/explicit factors that are leading you to feel unsatisfied. In my personal opinion, your thoughts suggest you may be slightly depressed, but don't quote/attack me on that.

    I wouldn't class it as laziness, but I know some teachers may be quick to cast rash judgments like that, because they are simply oblivious to the context. Perhaps you should have a sit down with your teachers or a parent and talk about this. Trust me, there is nothing more refreshing than just talking about things that are really bothering you.

    The main thing I can suggest though comes back to my initial statement: you need to find something you are passionate about. Perhaps you might be passionate about Media, but just not the area you are covering now. It's like that at maths at university sometimes. I largely enjoy the subject, but there are obviously some lecture courses where I have to force and push myself to do the assignments. But I do it because I know I want my degree and if I want to study more maths, I have to first do this. However, it doesn't seem as though you want to do the work, so it may just be time for a change - a refreshing start, something new to try.

    How do you find such new things to try? Hmm, not too sure - just explore!

    Hope this is (sort-of) helpful and that you feel better soon
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    (Original post by crashMATHS)
    Definitely throw the last suggestion out of the window.

    It sounds like you have the goals, but you haven't found something you're passionate about yet. There is a difference between wanting to simply go to university and wanting to go to university to study something particular.

    I understand this in a slightly different context; when I recently went through a relationship break up, I lost interest in a lot of the things I really did once like, including maths (strange since it's my degree!). Part of it was due to factors such as becoming depressed coming into play and just the context. That said, I have regained interest in a lot of these things and other, new things too. So I would think that you should consider whether or not it is a plain lack of interest that is demotivating you or some other subtle/explicit factors that are leading you to feel unsatisfied. In my personal opinion, your thoughts suggest you may be slightly depressed, but don't quote/attack me on that.

    I wouldn't class it as laziness, but I know some teachers may be quick to cast rash judgments like that, because they are simply oblivious to the context. Perhaps you should have a sit down with your teachers or a parent and talk about this. Trust me, there is nothing more refreshing than just talking about things that are really bothering you.

    The main thing I can suggest though comes back to my initial statement: you need to find something you are passionate about. Perhaps you might be passionate about Media, but just not the area you are covering now. It's like that at maths at university sometimes. I largely enjoy the subject, but there are obviously some lecture courses where I have to force and push myself to do the assignments. But I do it because I know I want my degree and if I want to study more maths, I have to first do this. However, it doesn't seem as though you want to do the work, so it may just be time for a change - a refreshing start, something new to try.

    How do you find such new things to try? Hmm, not too sure - just explore!

    Hope this is (sort-of) helpful and that you feel better soon
    Thank you for replying

    I think I might be depressed too. I saw about 4 different counsellors on and off within the space of about 3 or 4 years, but nothing got resolved. Rather than try and work on certain issues with me, they would just sit there while we'd talk about the same old things every week - which might be useful for some but it did nothing for me.
    I feel like they didn't even care. The first counsellor I saw told me I had no reason to feel the way that I did because I am looked after well. Another told me she was leaving and referred me to a different counsellor right after I told her I had attempted suicide, which, is fair enough I guess, she was leaving but then the replacement counsellor told me we'd have only six sessions together and offered no support (other than talking), after I'd just done that.

    In terms of passion, I think you might be right about that too. I've always loved music, since I was a toddler I've loved singing and playing instruments. Media is a relatively new thing I that discovered I enjoyed at GCSE. I am good at it and it's fun, but I don't think I'm passionate enough about any one area. I've applied for Digital Media degrees because I think it would suit me best as I consume a lot of digital media - but passionate? I haven't had the chance to explore it so I honestly don't know.

    I know I should probably tell a teacher, but the last thing I told my tutor I regret telling him, so.

    I'm not sure what my point in posting this is, I just enjoy getting it all out I suppose. Thanks for your advice
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    (Original post by NatCx)
    Thank you for replying

    I think I might be depressed too. I saw about 4 different counsellors on and off within the space of about 3 or 4 years, but nothing got resolved. Rather than try and work on certain issues with me, they would just sit there while we'd talk about the same old things every week - which might be useful for some but it did nothing for me.
    I feel like they didn't even care. The first counsellor I saw told me I had no reason to feel the way that I did because I am looked after well. Another told me she was leaving and referred me to a different counsellor right after I told her I had attempted suicide, which, is fair enough I guess, she was leaving but then the replacement counsellor told me we'd have only six sessions together and offered no support (other than talking), after I'd just done that.

    In terms of passion, I think you might be right about that too. I've always loved music, since I was a toddler I've loved singing and playing instruments. Media is a relatively new thing I that discovered I enjoyed at GCSE. I am good at it and it's fun, but I don't think I'm passionate enough about any one area. I've applied for Digital Media degrees because I think it would suit me best as I consume a lot of digital media - but passionate? I haven't had the chance to explore it so I honestly don't know.

    I know I should probably tell a teacher, but the last thing I told my tutor I regret telling him, so.

    I'm not sure what my point in posting this is, I just enjoy getting it all out I suppose. Thanks for your advice
    Talking to someone close would probably be a lot better - someone you know can support you.

    I find writing quite helpful in expressing my thoughts. If you need to do it again, feel free to create another thread and tag me to it.

    Hope it all goes well
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    (Original post by NatCx)
    Thank you for replying

    I think I might be depressed too. I saw about 4 different counsellors on and off within the space of about 3 or 4 years, but nothing got resolved. Rather than try and work on certain issues with me, they would just sit there while we'd talk about the same old things every week - which might be useful for some but it did nothing for me.
    I feel like they didn't even care. The first counsellor I saw told me I had no reason to feel the way that I did because I am looked after well. Another told me she was leaving and referred me to a different counsellor right after I told her I had attempted suicide, which, is fair enough I guess, she was leaving but then the replacement counsellor told me we'd have only six sessions together and offered no support (other than talking), after I'd just done that.

    In terms of passion, I think you might be right about that too. I've always loved music, since I was a toddler I've loved singing and playing instruments. Media is a relatively new thing I that discovered I enjoyed at GCSE. I am good at it and it's fun, but I don't think I'm passionate enough about any one area. I've applied for Digital Media degrees because I think it would suit me best as I consume a lot of digital media - but passionate? I haven't had the chance to explore it so I honestly don't know.

    I know I should probably tell a teacher, but the last thing I told my tutor I regret telling him, so.

    I'm not sure what my point in posting this is, I just enjoy getting it all out I suppose. Thanks for your advice
    I'm sorry you had to go through that, try to find another, actually GOOD, counsellor that will help you work through everything Don't give up, finding the support of a good one really helps. PM me if you wish. Good luck.
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    UPDATE:
    I still haven't done any work and I still feel like crap. So, not really an update.

    I really don't want to live in this house with my mum anymore and the 7 months until uni seem like forever. She's constantly critical of me, everything I do gets some sort of criticism; I answered the door the other day and apparently I did it "wrong". She passes judgement in non verbal ways too, through her eyes and her body language, and when I call her out on it she tries to act as though I'm imagining things but I tend to get it out of her anyway. It makes me upset so I'll usually rant about it for a while, which then leads to more criticism on the tone of voice I'm using in public, but she makes me mad! When I try to explain my frustration and what she's done to upset me, I get thing like "okay, I won't say anything" or "I'll just keep my mouth shut", not genuine apologies -- not apologies at all but a tactic to turn the focus on me and make me seem unreasonable!

    She drives me mad. She grew up with a verbally/emotionally abusive mother so I guess that's where she gets it from, but you think she'd try harder not to be like her mum or at least apologize when she's hurt me. I can't tell if she knows that the way she behaves is wrong or if she actually can't see anything wrong with the way she goes on.

    Genuinely considering moving out, but I don't have much money or a job.
 
 
 
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