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    Tue 31 Jan, 2017 07:08 pm
    I dont even know where to start. My ex and I are both 21. We fell in love when we were 17. He was my first boyfriend and first love, and I was his second relationship (he dated a girl for two years in high school). Since the beggining of our relationship it has been a cycle of breaking up and getting back together. In the first two years, it was because of his weed addiction, which i was not ok with. He would quit, then relapse, break up with me, hate his life, then come crawling back after about two weeks, and I would always let him because I loved him. In the most recent two years, weed is no longer in the picture,however he has been craving a life that he thinks he needs to be happy. He wants to be single and travel with his friends and even though he hasn’t said it, I believe he wants to sleep with other girls because he has only ever slept with me and his ex. He feels like he is too young to be in a serious relationship and that I am holding him back from what he wants to do.

    He has said this everytime he has broken up with me, which seems to be every four months. He lives wildly for about two weeks (clubbing every weekend etc.) then comes crawling back to me when he realizes it doesn’t actually make him that happy. He has recently started at a new job at Flight Centre, where the culture there is very party orientated. Since he has started he seems to be very influenced by his colleagues, who encourage him to party hard and “live life to the max”. Since he has started, I knew it was only a matter of time before he left me again. Sure enough, two and a half weeks ago he broke up with me, saying that his heart wasn’t in it anymore and that I was holding him back. I took it very well and told him i understood and just wanted him to be happy. When he left i broke down in tears and I have been absolutely shattered since.
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    I kept telling myself its just like every other time, and he will come back, but its been nearly three weeks and I havent heard a word from him. I havent tried to contact him because I know he needs space. I miss him so so much. I found out from a friend of a friend that he joined tinder the day after we broke up and has been talking to many girls on there. I found out last night that he went on a date with a girl, and took her to my favourite spot by the river. I am so devastated. I dont understand what is going through his head or how he could forget about me so quickly. I dont understand why he isn’t upset, or why he doesn’t miss me. Do you think he will still come back this time? I really want to fix things 🙁
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    (Original post by rachelg12)
    Tue 31 Jan, 2017 07:08 pm
    I dont even know where to start. My ex and I are both 21. We fell in love when we were 17. He was my first boyfriend and first love, and I was his second relationship (he dated a girl for two years in high school). Since the beggining of our relationship it has been a cycle of breaking up and getting back together. In the first two years, it was because of his weed addiction, which i was not ok with. He would quit, then relapse, break up with me, hate his life, then come crawling back after about two weeks, and I would always let him because I loved him. In the most recent two years, weed is no longer in the picture,however he has been craving a life that he thinks he needs to be happy. He wants to be single and travel with his friends and even though he hasn’t said it, I believe he wants to sleep with other girls because he has only ever slept with me and his ex. He feels like he is too young to be in a serious relationship and that I am holding him back from what he wants to do.

    He has said this everytime he has broken up with me, which seems to be every four months. He lives wildly for about two weeks (clubbing every weekend etc.) then comes crawling back to me when he realizes it doesn’t actually make him that happy. He has recently started at a new job at Flight Centre, where the culture there is very party orientated. Since he has started he seems to be very influenced by his colleagues, who encourage him to party hard and “live life to the max”. Since he has started, I knew it was only a matter of time before he left me again. Sure enough, two and a half weeks ago he broke up with me, saying that his heart wasn’t in it anymore and that I was holding him back. I took it very well and told him i understood and just wanted him to be happy. When he left i broke down in tears and I have been absolutely shattered since.
    Ads by Kiosked

    I kept telling myself its just like every other time, and he will come back, but its been nearly three weeks and I havent heard a word from him. I havent tried to contact him because I know he needs space. I miss him so so much. I found out from a friend of a friend that he joined tinder the day after we broke up and has been talking to many girls on there. I found out last night that he went on a date with a girl, and took her to my favourite spot by the river. I am so devastated. I dont understand what is going through his head or how he could forget about me so quickly. I dont understand why he isn’t upset, or why he doesn’t miss me. Do you think he will still come back this time? I really want to fix things 🙁
    Yes he will come nack when hes run out of other people to sleep with or feeling a bit low and needs his ego boosting. Question is will you be foolish enough to take him back. You have chosen to trap yourself in a cycle. It will drain the energy from you and it wont work. I'd find it all rather dull.

    Why not tell him no? Stop letting him take advantage and being 2nd 3rd or 4th best and find someone decent? Its normal to meet several diffrent partners before you settle down. If you hadnt realised HE DOESNT CARE ABOUT YOU.. Sorry look at his behaviour. Wake up and start doingw ahts best for you and makes you happy.
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    This guy is a trash bag. block him and move on.

    He doesn't give a **** about you. He just uses you because he knows he can come back to you when ever he wants. Do you want to be with someone that will leave you at the first sign of something he believes is better? You're literally is safety net.
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    (Original post by 999tigger)
    Yes he will come nack when hes run out of other people to sleep with or feeling a bit low and needs his ego boosting. Question is will you be foolish enough to take him back. You have chosen to trap yourself in a cycle. It will drain the energy from you and it wont work. I'd find it all rather dull.

    Why not tell him no? Stop letting him take advantage and being 2nd 3rd or 4th best and find someone decent? Its normal to meet several diffrent partners before you settle down. If you hadnt realised HE DOESNT CARE ABOUT YOU.. Sorry look at his behaviour. Wake up and start doingw ahts best for you and makes you happy.
    I know why you would say that its just so much easier said than done I truly love him and I do love our relationship, and I have tried to hard to force myself to not want to be with him but I just can't. Do you think there is anyway of breaking this cycle that we are in without having to break up forever?
 
 
 
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