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Make up a dumb excuse for skipping work watch

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    My favourite football team lost on Sunday, so I needed Monday to recover.
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    Very Important Poster
    I'm in a good mood today and I don't want it to be spoiled.
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    "I've gone into labour"

    Especially ridiculous if you're a guy.
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    "This girl bit my **** and broke it" - an actual phone call I received one morning.
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    I received a threatening phone call from the electric company and needed to report it to the FBI.
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    Wanked off too much and now I can't type
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    "Sorry I can't come into work today, its my cat's birthday"
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    My parents grounded me for talking to strangers..
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    I put my uniform in the microwave to dry quicker and it caught fire...
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