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    • #3
    #3

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    How am I horrible? I didn't say it was just because she was a waitress that I thought she wasn't very intelligent is is also the things she says and how she writes her messages. And tbh if you're messaging someone you barely know you need to make your judgement on/impression of them on whatever info you have, everyone will do that on tinder it's not like it's just me.
    look all I'm saying is don't judge a book by its cover. You have very little information and you have already come to the conclusion that she is not very "intelligent" and that's just wrong!

    You haven't even met her! like I said your very judgemental and a lot of women don't like that in a man. By the way I have come across a lot of, let's just say not very "intelligent" people at uni.Yes they have all the qualifications and stuff,but that doesn't make perfect and know that you are not perfect yourself.Meet up with the girl ,talk to her and get to know her (without sounding judgemental of course ) and THEN come to your conclusion on whether she is right for you or not. if you like her all well and good. if you don't then just move on. 🙂
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    I think I would feel the complete same in your situation, I'm not going to lie. But do you really have other plans or anything to loose, apart from time?
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    This is something that really irks me about uni. It's this idea that going to uni makes you somewhat smarter and that you come out the other side this supremely intelligent person and that anyone who didn't go to uni should be looked down upon.

    I'm not applying that to you fully in this situation but the theme is there. Some of the most intelligent people I've met have never considered uni and in the same sense many of the least intelligent people I've met have been very high academic achievers.

    Only through acceptance of all and discard of airs and graces will anyone ever be truly happy.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Fair enough but its the truth, a waitress isn't exactly a good job. I am not judging her character or personality from that, just the fact she doesn't seem very intelligent and while we seem to get on now I just think the intelligence gap will probably mean we don't have much to talk about.
    I've been a waitress for two years now and I can tell you from first hand experience that it's a really stressful and physically demanding job. You need a lot of patience, organisation and the ability to keep a cool head in order to be a good waitress. It bears no impact on intelligence whatsoever.

    Also my boyfriend doesn't have any qualifications past a handful of GCSE's and we have so much to talk about and discuss - the idea that we're won't have anything to speak about because I have more pieces of paper with numbers/titles on is ridiculous
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    I used to think like you do. I am in the best university in my country. I bumped into a guy I knew from 9th grade. We only talked for like 3 days back then though. Anyways, we were talking for some months and he grew to like me but I couldn't shake off the feeling of not wanting to date him solely because I felt he wasn't "on my level" of intelligence and because he studied in an institute. As mean as it sounds, I would have felt embarrassed if people knew I was dating him just because of that. Everyone pressured me too. Not to date him because I was too good for him "intelligence wise". But you know what?

    I ignored what they said and ignored my own ignorance, and he has been the best ex I have ever had. He was so bright and so curious. Just because someone is not in uni, or studies in an institute, doesn't mean they are not smart.

    GIVE HER A CHANCE, OP!!!
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    meet up, she's definitely lovely!
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    look all I'm saying is don't judge a book by its cover. You have very little information and you have already come to the conclusion that she is not very "intelligent" and that's just wrong!

    You haven't even met her! like I said your very judgemental and a lot of women don't like that in a man. By the way I have come across a lot of, let's just say not very "intelligent" people at uni.Yes they have all the qualifications and stuff,but that doesn't make perfect and know that you are not perfect yourself.Meet up with the girl ,talk to her and get to know her (without sounding judgemental of course ) and THEN come to your conclusion on whether she is right for you or not. if you like her all well and good. if you don't then just move on. 🙂
    Yeah I completely understand what you're saying. I know the judgement I made was based on limited information because I was just going off what I had which wasn't very much. I know I'm not perfect. Maybe "not very intelligent" wasn't the right thing to say, what I meant was more immature.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by bones-mccoy)
    I've been a waitress for two years now and I can tell you from first hand experience that it's a really stressful and physically demanding job. You need a lot of patience, organisation and the ability to keep a cool head in order to be a good waitress. It bears no impact on intelligence whatsoever.

    Also my boyfriend doesn't have any qualifications past a handful of GCSE's and we have so much to talk about and discuss - the idea that we're won't have anything to speak about because I have more pieces of paper with numbers/titles on is ridiculous
    Oh don't get me wrong I am not saying it isn't a hard job, I know it can be difficult and demanding.

    And we do have a couple of things in common to talk about but she seems a lot more immature than I am.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by BettyJ4)
    I think I would feel the complete same in your situation, I'm not going to lie. But do you really have other plans or anything to loose, apart from time?
    Yeah that's what I'm thinking. Even if it goes badly I still get the experience and get to see a film that I want to see anyway and if anything happens it's a bonus.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Yeah that's what I'm thinking. Even if it goes badly I still get the experience and get to see a film that I want to see anyway and if anything happens it's a bonus.
    Looool sorry but that is pretty funny. :rofl:

    By the sounds of things you've already made your mind up about not wanting to see her so tbh anyone's input on here isn't really going to change your mind but i'd say try it out but be a little more open minded.
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    (Original post by bones-mccoy)
    You're being incredibly judgemental, I'd cancel the date just so she doesn't have to witness you in person
    I was thinking the same. Poor girl...
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Dreamgirlxx)
    Looool sorry but that is pretty funny. :rofl:

    By the sounds of things you've already made your mind up about not wanting to see her so tbh anyone's input on here isn't really going to change your mind but i'd say try it out but be a little more open minded.
    I haven't already made up my mind I am just cautious and I still going to go on the date to see what happens and see how it goes.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by mashbbk)
    I was thinking the same. Poor girl...
    Well tbf I made a judgement based on what limited information I had which is what most people do on tinder anyway and you have made a judgement on me bases on one thread which is a lot less that I had to go on when talking to this girl so really you have done exactly the same thing as me.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I haven't already made up my mind I am just cautious and I still going to go on the date to see what happens and see how it goes.
    Alright, well hopefully it will go better than you expect it too
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Dreamgirlxx)
    Alright, well hopefully it will go better than you expect it too
    Yeah I'm hoping that too. I do actually want it to go well because she does seem nice.
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    I swear this is the plot of an episode of Friends.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Trinculo)
    I swear this is the plot of an episode of Friends.
    I don't know, I've never actually watched friends
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    (Original post by Trinculo)
    I swear this is the plot of an episode of Friends.
    http://thoughtcatalog.com/charlotte-...food-industry/
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    What I love is how TSR is absolute unreality. It's like a wormhole into a parallel universe.

    TSR:
    -Wants to meet someone smart and engaging
    -Goes on Tinder - a dating app optimised for physical appearance
    -Complains that she might not be smart or engaging enough


    Reality:
    -Match with someone attractive on Tinder - but she's just a waitress.
    -Doesn't matter. It's a done deal.
    -Occupation and level of intellectual sophistication do not even make the list of criteria
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    I really don't think you are being harsh. I'm currently in this situation, I'm talking to I guy but we don't have much in common I'm 17 and his 22 and he doesn't really know anything. he is cute but the more talk to him the more bored I am, he doesn't know anything, not even our prime minister! I would say go on the date but I don't think your being harsh at all we are from two different worlds
 
 
 
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