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Why do guys start being weird after you have sex Watch

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    So recently me and my bf decided we wanted to experiment in our relationship, so we opted for doing the whole "open relationship" thing, but bearing in mind we were both each others first when it came to sex and getting into a proper relationship, and we had never done anything like this before. So anyway we set up Tinder accounts and I started talking to a few guys, one being a guy 7 years older than me, and since the age difference was fairly big I didn't think anything of it, except that we proceeded to talk for like 5 weeks and then after meeting up for the first time (nothing happened) we decided to meet up again like 2 weeks later, obviously for sex. My bf had something set up on the same day ironically but he was going to be staying out. I wasn't bothered by this. So me and this guy are chilling at his and we **** like 3 times (after the first time I was told he would definitely want to do it again) and at some point we ordered food, he paid and said that I could pay next time (again insinuating that he would want to do it again) so then we cuddled cause apparently he's a cuddley kind of guy, and we did this for like 30-45 minutes. then the next day I didn't message him because I wanted to suss out the situation: would it be the typical guy ignores girl, or would we just carry on being normal, so I left it up to him to see what he would do, after a while he messaged me like normal, so I thought I had my answer. So I messaged him the day after that and he saw the message and just didn't reply? I didn't message him again that day, but did again the day after that just to see if he was okay, and he seemed fine, he replied, but when I sent him a picture of something I thought he'd find funny he saw it and just didn't say anything again, this happened a few more times. But the point being is that I don't understand this kind of behaviour and its really confusing me? I don't know whether to just not bother messaging him again and leaving him to it, or being direct and asking what the deal is? Because the problem is that he seems like a cool person so I'd at least like to be friends, and I'd also prefer to remember him as that cool person instead of a someone who turned into a **** afterwards? So what's his deal and what should I do
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    If you have an arrangement that is purely sex then he may be finding all these messages to be an alert sign that you are developing feelings for him. By not responding it could be that he's trying to dissuade that from happening. It could also be that despite his comment about takeout, he may have seen it as a one-time thing or at some point made the realisation that he doesn't want it to be more than that.

    Did you mention you have a boyfriend already? If not, it's possible he's come across social media accounts and such and learned that you do.
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    He knew that I had a boyfriend, I made that clear, and he said that he wasn't sure how he felt about that, but afterwards said he still liked me and wanted to have sex, however I considerEd that he might think I was developing feelings for him, and thought that was silly because I'm already with someone else and it was and ways going to be no strings attached, he has since confirmed that he wants to do it again, but we just don't talk, so I'm just gonna leave him to it
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    (Original post by Lau97)
    He knew that I had a boyfriend, I made that clear, and he said that he wasn't sure how he felt about that, but afterwards said he still liked me and wanted to have sex, however I considerEd that he might think I was developing feelings for him, and thought that was silly because I'm already with someone else and it was and ways going to be no strings attached, he has since confirmed that he wants to do it again, but we just don't talk, so I'm just gonna leave him to it
    He probably thinks its a friends with benefits thing and doesn't feel he needs to talk to you otherwise.
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    why r u sleeping with other guys if u have a bf ? whats the point in beig in a relationship if ur just gonna cheat on him and the same for him? and the reason why this guy isnt bothering with u now is cos he got what he wanted he just used u for sex which is what msot people go on tinder for !!
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    (Original post by Lau97)
    So recently me and my bf decided we wanted to experiment in our relationship, so we opted for doing the whole "open relationship" thing, but bearing in mind we were both each others first when it came to sex and getting into a proper relationship, and we had never done anything like this before. So anyway we set up Tinder accounts and I started talking to a few guys, one being a guy 7 years older than me, and since the age difference was fairly big I didn't think anything of it, except that we proceeded to talk for like 5 weeks and then after meeting up for the first time (nothing happened) we decided to meet up again like 2 weeks later, obviously for sex. My bf had something set up on the same day ironically but he was going to be staying out. I wasn't bothered by this. So me and this guy are chilling at his and we **** like 3 times (after the first time I was told he would definitely want to do it again) and at some point we ordered food, he paid and said that I could pay next time (again insinuating that he would want to do it again) so then we cuddled cause apparently he's a cuddley kind of guy, and we did this for like 30-45 minutes. then the next day I didn't message him because I wanted to suss out the situation: would it be the typical guy ignores girl, or would we just carry on being normal, so I left it up to him to see what he would do, after a while he messaged me like normal, so I thought I had my answer. So I messaged him the day after that and he saw the message and just didn't reply? I didn't message him again that day, but did again the day after that just to see if he was okay, and he seemed fine, he replied, but when I sent him a picture of something I thought he'd find funny he saw it and just didn't say anything again, this happened a few more times. But the point being is that I don't understand this kind of behaviour and its really confusing me? I don't know whether to just not bother messaging him again and leaving him to it, or being direct and asking what the deal is? Because the problem is that he seems like a cool person so I'd at least like to be friends, and I'd also prefer to remember him as that cool person instead of a someone who turned into a **** afterwards? So what's his deal and what should I do
    I was expecting it to be ab bout your bf.

    Men arent all the same. You barely know this one. Tinder is commonly just used for sex. His idea of what happens after differs from your. You think casual be be reasonable contact with each other, he thinks sex and interaction when it suits him plus he doesnt wnat anything clingy( even if you arent) plus he might be sleeping with others. he could just be busy.

    Imo treat him like a fb ( dont think he could handle a relationship) pr just move on.
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    Catch them off guard. Have sex but rush off as soon as you're done. Lay down ground rules- No cuddling, no kissing.

    If you act cold with them, they'd want you more.
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    sorry to break it to you honey but hes just not that into you. He enjoys the sex and will always be interested in that but nothing more

    If he genuinely liked you believe me he'd want to talk to you.
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    (Original post by 999tigger)
    I was expecting it to be ab bout your bf.

    Men arent all the same. You barely know this one. Tinder is commonly just used for sex. His idea of what happens after differs from your. You think casual be be reasonable contact with each other, he thinks sex and interaction when it suits him plus he doesnt wnat anything clingy( even if you arent) plus he might be sleeping with others. he could just be busy.

    Imo treat him like a fb ( dont think he could handle a relationship) pr just move on.
    That makes sense, I've considered all these things, he said it had been awhile since he'd last had any sexual interactions, and when he does talk to me he complains that he's bored, but I've gone for moving on lool
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    (Original post by Lau97)
    That makes sense, I've considered all these things, he said it had been awhile since he'd last had any sexual interactions, and when he does talk to me he complains that he's bored, but I've gone for moving on lool
    Did you use protection also did you prefer sleeping with him to your boyfriend?
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    First question that arises here:

    He isn't your boyfriend, it was just sex, so why do you care?
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    Why the f**k are open relationships even a thing?

    Sounds like an absolutely horrendous thought, with little benefit to any one.
 
 
 
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