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    Back into old habits. Once again my attempts at leisure via competitive societies have backfired and left me less motivated, more miserable, and poorer, as my pathetic, fragile ego compels me to yet again turn to alcohol to mask the pains of matters that others would consider beyond trivial. I know everybody sees me as a **** and a joke and that I will never change. No matter how I try to master my thoughts and control myself, the stupid, irrational side, which I suppose is in many respects the main side, takes over. I ultimately have no reason to keep on, but I do. I will probably get a first this year. Maybe even a good one. But it doesn't matter. I am broken, deficient, unlikeable and, most crucially, devoid of any practical abilities. I will not find companionship, nor will I find professional satisfaction of any kind. I will find neither wealth nor dignified poverty; I will be a fool dissatisfied and purposeless for the rest of my worthless life, which I truly wish had never began.
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    (Original post by 13 1 20 8 42)
    Back into old habits. Once again my attempts at leisure via competitive societies have backfired and left me less motivated, more miserable, and poorer, as my pathetic, fragile ego compels me to yet again turn to alcohol to mask the pains of matters that others would consider beyond trivial. I know everybody sees me as a **** and a joke and that I will never change. No matter how I try to master my thoughts and control myself, the stupid, irrational side, which I suppose is in many respects the main side, takes over. I ultimately have no reason to keep on, but I do. I will probably get a first this year. Maybe even a good one. But it doesn't matter. I am broken, deficient, unlikeable and, most crucially, devoid of any practical abilities. I will not find companionship, nor will I find professional satisfaction of any kind. I will find neither wealth nor dignified poverty; I will be a fool dissatisfied and purposeless for the rest of my worthless life, which I truly wish had never began.



    Sounds like a complex situation. Mix of borderline schizophrenia and some existential depression in there too. I don't mean to be patronising but have you explored options to find something that could help. CBT or something like that?
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    (Original post by stefano865)


    Sounds like a complex situation. Mix of borderline schizophrenia and some existential depression in there too. I don't mean to be patronising but have you explored options to find something that could help. CBT or something like that?
    I do have counseling. Tbh I've felt fine for the past few weeks, for the most part. Certainly there must be an underlying problem for me to be so emotionally affected by ultimately unimportant events, but in general, I don't get to such a bad state of mind without some sort of "trigger". Perhaps just avoiding these scenarios would be the most healthy thing, but then in large part they make up what little social life and leisure time I have.
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    (Original post by Nunchuck-master-2334)
    I do martial arts pretty much everyday and am starting a year-long muscle-building program!
    Reshyna you wanted to know!
    ask me in a year
    sure i will
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    Just had my first date in ages get cancelled. I literally give up now.
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    (Original post by SpiritSharD)
    Just had my first date in ages get cancelled. I literally give up now.
    :console: never give up :cube:
    Always here for you :lovehug:
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    I'm not sure between where and where, but somehow I either lost the unwanted fat or I was seeing something that wasn't there :dontknow:


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    negativity bias is a (insert whatever swear word)
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    (Original post by CheeseIsVeg)
    :penguinhug: I know that feeling, I had a panic at 11pm last night because I couldn't find this one sheet which was my chemistry homework
    Eventually found it an hour later, it was stuck to another piece of paper. Now my room is more of a tip than it was before :cry:
    I hope you found it in the end!!!

    Friday :jive: Woooooo :jumphug: Anything planned this weekend? BP?
    :jumphug: its good that you found it! :yes: I'm usually told to tidy up as I go along by my parents, but I never do as its time consuming to do so...
    yes I did
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    Feeling so much pain! :banghead:
    Always feared about this, and now it's reality
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    A pain that's never incurable

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    (Original post by bizzy_penguin)
    :jumphug: its good that you found it! :yes: I'm usually told to tidy up as I go along by my parents, but I never do as its time consuming to do so...
    yes I did
    Me neither REBEL :mob::hugs:
    YAyy! Happy for you! :hugs: Hope you are ok today
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    (Original post by CheeseIsVeg)
    Me neither REBEL :mob::hugs:
    YAyy! Happy for you! :hugs: Hope you are ok today
    yes I am thx! , wbu? :hugs:was the chemistry due in for today?
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    (Original post by bizzy_penguin)
    yes I am thx! , wbu? :hugs:was the chemistry due in for today?
    :hugs: I'm ok, thanks
    Yep, handed it in today :awesome:
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    In pain

    I walked 4 miles today and now I'm covered in blisters and I'm a tad sunburnt
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    I accidentally bit the inside of my cheek when I was eating, so now I think I've got an ulcer... it kinda hurts
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    make a complaint about a pub, their response "you're barred". seems legit
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    barely slept 2 hours last night cos a fkn mouse came into my room!!
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    Feeling a bit emotional after watching Charlotte's Web for the first time :cry2:

    Posted from TSR Mobile
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    (Original post by Spock's Socks)
    Feeling a bit emotional after watching Charlotte's Web for the first time :cry2:

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    Oh man, I saw that in the cinema for my birthday a couple of years back now :cry:
    :cube::console:
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    I didn't think a film would hit me in the feels as much as The Green Mile did but Charlotte's Web certainly did! :cry2: brilliant film though :yep:
    (Original post by CheeseIsVeg)
    Oh man, I saw that in the cinema for my birthday a couple of years back now :cry:
    :cube::console:
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    (Original post by Spock's Socks)
    I didn't think a film would hit me in the feels as much as The Green Mile did but Charlotte's Web certainly did! :cry2: brilliant film though :yep:
    It's because it is so cute and innocent and animally and :lovehug:
    Yeah it is pretty great
    :hugs: Have you had a good day?
 
 
 
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