The Student Room Group

I want to drop out

Hi everyone,

This is a long one so bare with me please !

I've been feeling unhappy at university for quite a while. I'm in my first year and have never really felt settled here. I suffer from quite bad anxiety (which has only got worse since being here) and there are days when I will not leave my flat because of this and I miss lectures/seminars etc. I also am finding the drinking culture very hard to cope with, as I seem to have ended up with a group of friends who want to go drinking every day or 2 (before and after lectures??) which I'm not a huge fan of and I'm finding it increasingly hard to socialise. I don't really have any very close friends who I can talk to about things here and feel quite lonely. I am also 4 hours away from home and on a campus uni making me feel more isolated :frown:

I am currently a course where I have 8 contact hours a week. I have found this to be increasingly hard as I know I would rather be doing something much more hands on. I find the lectures uninspiring and don't feel like I am getting very much out of my course in a whole, which is a shame because the university I am at has a very good reputation for the subject and I thought having a smaller number of contact hours would suit me better.

A slight issue is that as housing started so early, I had a house and a group to live with for second year by November/December time which I am a bit worried about packing in as I feel bad for my other future housemates. (Also worried about future accommodation fees etc)

My parents want me to come home as they say they are worried about me and don't like the idea of me stuck on campus feeling anxious and sad and only going to lectures a very small amount of the time but my boyfriend is against the idea which is not helping me make a decision...

This is just some of the reasons why I want to leave, sorry it's a bit rambly but does anyone have any insight they might be able to give me? thanks!
(edited 7 years ago)
Original post by Lottiexm
Hi everyone,

This is a long one so bare with me please !

I've been feeling unhappy at university for quite a while. I'm in my first year and have never really felt settled here. I suffer from quite bad anxiety (which has only got worse since being here) and there are days when I will not leave my flat because of this and I miss lectures/seminars etc. I also am finding the drinking culture very hard to cope with, as I seem to have ended up with a group of friends who want to go drinking every day or 2 (before and after lectures??) which I'm not a huge fan of and I'm finding it increasingly hard to socialise. I don't really have any very close friends who I can talk to about things here and feel quite lonely. I am also 4 hours away from home and on a campus uni making me feel more isolated :frown:

I am currently a course where I have 8 contact hours a week. I have found this to be increasingly hard as I know I would rather be doing something much more hands on. I find the lectures uninspiring and don't feel like I am getting very much out of my course in a whole, which is a shame because the university I am at has a very good reputation for the subject and I thought having a smaller number of contact hours would suit me better.

A slight issue is that as housing started so early, I had a house and a group to live with for second year by November/December time which I am a bit worried about packing in as I feel bad for my other future housemates. (Also worried about future accommodation fees etc)

My parents want me to come home as they say they are worried about me and don't like the idea of me stuck on campus feeling anxious and sad and only going to lectures a very small amount of the time but my boyfriend is against the idea which is not helping me make a decision...

This is just some of the reasons why I want to leave, sorry it's a bit rambly but does anyone have any insight they might be able to give me? thanks!


It sounds like you're struggling with both the social and academic side, if it was just one side i'd be inclined to say give it more time but since it sounds like you don't enjoy the course, i think the grass could be greener for you elsewhere. Why does your boyfriend not support you leaving? As for housing, if you've given them months warning then i'd hope a replacement for your place could be found without too much hassle :smile:
Reply 2
Original post by claireestelle
It sounds like you're struggling with both the social and academic side, if it was just one side i'd be inclined to say give it more time but since it sounds like you don't enjoy the course, i think the grass could be greener for you elsewhere. Why does your boyfriend not support you leaving? As for housing, if you've given them months warning then i'd hope a replacement for your place could be found without too much hassle :smile:


Yes I am finding both the social and academic side difficult :frown: He doesn't think it is a good decision as I went to university with 2 AS grades and 2 A2s (as I moved college between year 12/13 where they didn't do the other AS subject I had been studying therefore not finishing 3 a levels) I want to drop out and finish the AS I did last year so I have 3 full a levels and can get into a different uni but he thinks I should continue with my studies at university and additionally finish my a level as he thinks I would have a higher chance of getting into university somewhere else but I'm not sure it would make much difference? (currently on track for a 2:1 this year...)

And yeah with the housing, I have paid the deposit a couple months back which is the other issue but surely I'd get it back if I wasn't living there anymore and they found a replacement?

As for outstanding accommodation fees I may have if I quit now what would happen there?
Original post by Lottiexm
Yes I am finding both the social and academic side difficult :frown: He doesn't think it is a good decision as I went to university with 2 AS grades and 2 A2s (as I moved college between year 12/13 where they didn't do the other AS subject I had been studying therefore not finishing 3 a levels) I want to drop out and finish the AS I did last year so I have 3 full a levels and can get into a different uni but he thinks I should continue with my studies at university and additionally finish my a level as he thinks I would have a higher chance of getting into university somewhere else but I'm not sure it would make much difference? (currently on track for a 2:1 this year...)

And yeah with the housing, I have paid the deposit a couple months back which is the other issue but surely I'd get it back if I wasn't living there anymore and they found a replacement?

As for outstanding accommodation fees I may have if I quit now what would happen there?


If you finished first year then you could get a place somewhere else without needing that 3as to be an a2 grade but at the same time you may find other places you like (although it's difficult to find) that would take you without it.
It depends on your tenancy agreements for both of those questions so have a good read of them before you make a decision.

I guess you would be in a better place if you could stick it out for 3/4 months and finish 1st year but it's up to you to decide if you think it would do your health too much harm to do so or if you feel that's worth it.

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