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    So here's a little context; I am currently in high school and in a group of seven, I have known one of the girls since year 2 and two of those friends label me as their 'best friend'.

    Our entire group to me is more of a hierarchy(It was the only term I could think of that fit). Everyone in the group follows someone and acts like sheep. My best friend that I've known since year 2 is sort of like the 'leader' and I don't know how but so am I.

    I hate to use terms like 'leaders' with friends but if you spent even a day with my friends you'd understand why I'm using such a term.

    Everyone follows each other to the point where they dont even have their on opinion of matters anymore; so if for example I give my opinion on a certain TV show and ask my best friend about it and if she says she hates it (Usually she has never even watched the show before) suddenly everyone starts talking about how much they hate it.

    I would be okay with this if they didn't move the topics onto people and force each other to hate people that have never done ANYTHING to them.

    Plus the facts that my friends make the dumbest jokes, because we all share the same ethnicity they tend to swear in our second language and they will laugh as if it's the funniest thing ever and if I don't laugh(because I hardly ever find it amusing) they will accuse me of being depressed and I hate seeing my friends get worried so I just pretend to laugh to get them off my case.

    I also noted there is a lot of favouritism in my group and even though Im labelled the best friend of two of the girls; they always seem to low key shove me aside and ignore me. I don't blame them though because Im a really sensitive person(I've never told them this and tend to not act like myself around them) and I have this stupid, stupid defence mechanism where I play dumb when someones ignoring me and not attempt to talk to them after they rejected my first offer, I take rejection to heart a lot of the times and just go cold when I get constantly ignored and shoved aside, I won't admit to it to people I know because I find it really embarrassing when people know how sensitive I am, I sort of have a running mouth at people and fire comebacks a lot as my friends have told me which makes me come off as cold and distant, I dont mean to but I've just grown so accustomed to acting like this with the people in my class.

    Lastly, my final point; I can't be true with myself with anyone, everyone is so immature and I find myself lost because theres no one to turn to. By the way, if you think I'm being pretentious with what Im saying then here are a few examples:

    Its a habit of people in my class to shout at people who cant speak English properly:
    "Go home, Monkey"
    "F*cking mango"

    They sexually talk about teachers/women and degrade them using the most vulgure terms:
    (We were discussing how in Romeo and Juliet they talk about raping women)
    "Why dont we still do that?"
    "Back when women knew that place"
    "Push them against the wall, that sounds fun"
    "Oh I'd like to do that to (MY NAME)."

    They also did this when our teacher was demonstrating how to sand a finished product:
    "Sir pretend it's (MY NAME)*Makes sexual noises*"

    They say these types of things on a daily basis so sorry if I cant find myself wanting to be friends with people like this and the girls arent much better; they act like sheep and talk behind each others back CONSTANTLY.

    I'm so lost, what do I do? I can't be friends with anyone in my year because there all trying to impress one another with gossip, insults and amount of detentions they can get.

    !I cant move schools by the way and I have two years left!
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    (Original post by VigilanteQueen)
    So here's a little context; I am currently in high school and in a group of seven, I have known one of the girls since year 2 and two of those friends label me as their 'best friend'.

    Our entire group to me is more of a hierarchy(It was the only term I could think of that fit). Everyone in the group follows someone and acts like sheep. My best friend that I've known since year 2 is sort of like the 'leader' and I don't know how but so am I.

    I hate to use terms like 'leaders' with friends but if you spent even a day with my friends you'd understand why I'm using such a term.

    Everyone follows each other to the point where they dont even have their on opinion of matters anymore; so if for example I give my opinion on a certain TV show and ask my best friend about it and if she says she hates it (Usually she has never even watched the show before) suddenly everyone starts talking about how much they hate it.

    I would be okay with this if they didn't move the topics onto people and force each other to hate people that have never done ANYTHING to them.

    Plus the facts that my friends make the dumbest jokes, because we all share the same ethnicity they tend to swear in our second language and they will laugh as if it's the funniest thing ever and if I don't laugh(because I hardly ever find it amusing) they will accuse me of being depressed and I hate seeing my friends get worried so I just pretend to laugh to get them off my case.

    I also noted there is a lot of favouritism in my group and even though Im labelled the best friend of two of the girls; they always seem to low key shove me aside and ignore me. I don't blame them though because Im a really sensitive person(I've never told them this and tend to not act like myself around them) and I have this stupid, stupid defence mechanism where I play dumb when someones ignoring me and not attempt to talk to them after they rejected my first offer, I take rejection to heart a lot of the times and just go cold when I get constantly ignored and shoved aside, I won't admit to it to people I know because I find it really embarrassing when people know how sensitive I am, I sort of have a running mouth at people and fire comebacks a lot as my friends have told me which makes me come off as cold and distant, I dont mean to but I've just grown so accustomed to acting like this with the people in my class.

    Lastly, my final point; I can't be true with myself with anyone, everyone is so immature and I find myself lost because theres no one to turn to. By the way, if you think I'm being pretentious with what Im saying then here are a few examples:

    Its a habit of people in my class to shout at people who cant speak English properly:
    "Go home, Monkey"
    "F*cking mango"

    They sexually talk about teachers/women and degrade them using the most vulgure terms:
    (We were discussing how in Romeo and Juliet they talk about raping women)
    "Why dont we still do that?"
    "Back when women knew that place"
    "Push them against the wall, that sounds fun"
    "Oh I'd like to do that to (MY NAME)."

    They also did this when our teacher was demonstrating how to sand a finished product:
    "Sir pretend it's (MY NAME)*Makes sexual noises*"

    They say these types of things on a daily basis so sorry if I cant find myself wanting to be friends with people like this and the girls arent much better; they act like sheep and talk behind each others back CONSTANTLY.

    I'm so lost, what do I do? I can't be friends with anyone in my year because there all trying to impress one another with gossip, insults and amount of detentions they can get.

    !I cant move schools by the way and I have two years left!
    I'm guessing you're in year 9 or 10? When I was in school at this age, I had the same problem. The other people in your class sound pretty disgusting if I'm honest. Maybe you could talk to your head of year and see if there's anything they can do for you, and about the behaviour of the others in your class. I'm not sure if your school is the same, but when I was in the group situation I actually moved out of the tutor group I was in with them, which was facilitated by my head of year, and made new friends in a different one. I didn't get myself into another group there, I just made friends there. I ended up being friends with all these different groups of friends, so I could move pretty fluidly between them. If things were too much with one group, there were other friends I could spend time with elsewhere. It's really good to try and get yourself out of one of those groups if you can. While they work for some people, they don't for others. I also found that when leaving school, they had more of a shock than I did. When it came to trying to keep in with all those friends in different colleges and sixth forms, I found it much easier than them because I spent my time between them whereas they were together all of the time, and had little social life outside of their group
 
 
 
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