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breaking up with someone & going out with someone new Watch

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    i just broke up with my boyfriend of a year after a wake up call that i wasn't (and had never been) in love with him and wasn't sexually attracted to him (and mainly have never been). however he had always been a really good companion and we have loads in common.

    i am almost entirety certain i want to date a new person - i am super attracted to him and get on really well etc. he's really into me too and is very serious about relationships "i'm either all in or out".

    my problems are, we have a lot of the same shared friendship group and a lot of my friends are very keen on my ex. i don't want to be seen dumping one guy for another so am thinking of waiting 2 months. also my friend who i've confided in has commented that she thinks i'm still not over my ex from years ago (or possibly just the situation?) as i avoid him etc. i am a bit worried that i won't "be over" this ex too in the way he was a really good companion, would think certain things etc and that i'll compare my new boyfriend to him. i want to take the next month or so to work all this out and not jump into a new relationship straight away...
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    You need to get over your ex first before jumping into a new relationship or that's just going to be a rebound and that doesn't usually end well. Give it time, don't rush into a new relationship.

    (Original post by rookie5)
    i just broke up with my boyfriend of a year after a wake up call that i wasn't (and had never been) in love with him and wasn't sexually attracted to him (and mainly have never been). however he had always been a really good companion and we have loads in common.

    i am almost entirety certain i want to date a new person - i am super attracted to him and get on really well etc. he's really into me too and is very serious about relationships "i'm either all in or out".

    my problems are, we have a lot of the same shared friendship group and a lot of my friends are very keen on my ex. i don't want to be seen dumping one guy for another so am thinking of waiting 2 months. also my friend who i've confided in has commented that she thinks i'm still not over my ex from years ago (or possibly just the situation?) as i avoid him etc. i am a bit worried that i won't "be over" this ex too in the way he was a really good companion, would think certain things etc and that i'll compare my new boyfriend to him. i want to take the next month or so to work all this out and not jump into a new relationship straight away...
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    I don't think you can generalise really, someone people like to wait a while before starting a new relationship whereas others can move on straight away. If the relationship had been fizzling out for a while anyway and your feelings had changed, it's not that much of a leap.
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    I don't think that there is a set amount of time you have to wait before starting a new relationship. It is dependent on how you are feeling and whether you feel that you are over the relationship or not. I suppose the question that I would be asking myself is, is there really a rush to get into this new relationship. There is no harm in taking some time where you are single. If this new guy is someone who is worth being in a relationship with then he will wait for you. So while I don't think that there needs to be a set time in it there would probably be a benefit to giving yourself a little bit of space but be the judge of that yourself rather than worrying what others will think.
 
 
 
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