Hanging out with female friends alone for a date - How to with THESE girls? Watch

Anonymous #1
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Report Thread starter 2 years ago
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I met these two girls when I was at uni and both were taken. Now they have BECOME SINGLE post graduation. Ironically just after I moved out of the bachelor pad to look after folks outside the city. I have to commute to get in to london where B lives. A lives up north now. I want to meet them for dates and hookup potentially. Advice on both?


GIRL A = cute, sweet, fun in private and extremely pretty. Butterfly feeling. Worked with her on coursework. She admired me a lot/my drive etc. Excellent rapport. Emigrated with bf abroad, kept in touch by text now and then. When she visited, wanted to see me (along with B and other friends). Last time, I met her alone when she was single (and here for 2 hrs) which I didn't know till I was eating with her. Always fancied her a bit. Would love to spend my first time (sex) with her.

She seemed excited to tell me she's moving back here by text about 6 months ago and that she can meet me more often. She texted me on landing back in the UK (she now lives in the north). A usually replies faster than I can type a response and as soon as she sees it. Asked me when I'd be back from a work trip and "hope she could see me soon". Suddenly when I offered as a treat to welcome her back and asked when she was free, she read that msg and blanked it for a MONTH. Then texted me as if she had done nothing wrong asking me how I was and that she'd try to visit london soon. I made a light joke of it about where did she go to. She replied much faster with long spiel about how she is and asked me back. Anyhow I obviously wasn't impressed at the GHOSTING. I replied back and got ghosted again lol. Sigh. Inexplicable given our interactions. She has only done this once before, when I asked her a question, she read it and then gave some vague response nothing to do with what I said a week later. The question at that time was simply asking if she was around in her country when I was on holiday there?!

She texted me again in early december last year saying she'd be in london in early feb and if I wanted to catch up. I thought it was pretty far away and asked her how come she was visiting. (I want to see her ALONE) Kinda said something along the lines of to visit me and some friends. I responded sure, didn't say much more given it was so far away. She wished me xmas and new years wishes first and had a brief flirty convo for a specific conversation. I notice her replies are still long and enthusiastic, but she BLUETICKS me and responds later which she NEVER used to do?? One thing is she can't be busy (no one is and I have a busier job), given her last seen on WhatsApp is actively changing throughout EVERY day and I can see her profile pic is of her on holiday sometimes lol.

Now it was going fine until suddenly a random GROUP CHAT was started by a mutual acquaintance. Let's call her girl C. Now I know her, but I wouldn't call her my friend. Girl C includes about 10 people in the group chat. It's about girl A visiting town, who's free to meet her? Now at the same time girl A had read and not replied to a text from me (again it's so weird her doing that, in the texts back and forth she always is lightning fast). She started replying to that one first! In the event only girl C was free lol. The other 8 ppl were busy. I avoided replying as I wanted to see girl A alone. Girl A did reply to me and said hope she can see me! I responded saying sure, just us, let's do something asking her which day is best on a particular weekend.

She responded FAST saying which is best for me lol. So I gave her the saturday and described what we could do, and when does her train get in. Now she didn't respond for 10 days. This time she apologised and said gets in early, "don't I want the others to come? But sounds a great plan!" I responded saying just want to see her after so long. (I didn't mention the obvious fact that there were no "others", only C). Then when trying to nail down a time, she replied again a week later, asking wouldn't I like to see C too, it'd be more fun with more ppl???! I again said just her. At this point irritated why she's dragging me into other plans. Trouble was on the GROUP CHAT, C starts asking am I free and I didn't want to look bad in front of another girl who I like on there, so said, might be on sat.

At this point no one texts back at all, till A privately messages me "so when are we meeting on sat". I said, "I get in at this time, and you?". No response. WTF? Then randomly 3 days later, and with 4 days to go, she texts me a long spiel with a flirty heyy how do i feel about going to the suburbs (I have to commute far for that) and visiting C, she was thinking of doing that, otherwise C and her would come and see me in london afterwards. So crazy right that she planned that separately I have no idea and she's giving me mixed signals? At this point, I wanted to say no, but gave her one last chance saying something flirty about her changing le plan, "When are you getting the train there". This was on both the group chat to C and privately to A. I got no response from either. At that point I messaged both the group chat and A saying to go ahead and I'll see them around. I ignored the message from A asking why I couldn't come.

Later on A sent holiday wishes to the group chat and flirtily mentioned me directly through an inside joke. That's good isn't it? I responded back directly to her and sent a group message to everyone in general. Then she messaged the group chat talking about a get together. Only 3 ppl were free out of 10. I messaged it saying I'm not free as I didn't want the hassle and I wanna meet her alone.

The only correspondence since was me sending her a flirty birthday text to which she responded within minutes and said "hope she can can see me soon".

1. HOW DO I MEET A ALONE and should I text her now? Was I asking A out both occasions?

GIRL B = cute, more outgoing in general and easier to flirt immediately with. Friends with A. Good rapport. Very bubbly. Kept in touch after by occasional text and saw her maybe once post graduating, though not enough. I did like her and love her laugh and bedroom eyes.

Out of irritation with A ghosting me for that month (see above) before christmas, in december, I messaged B who I normally only see at group meets and asked if she was free in the evening whilst I was visiting. She responded fast. I should mention, usually I have a much faster and longer reply from girl A. But B was giving me flirty responses indeed. She messaged back sure and we arranged a time, and we met up for a long dinner (I paid) and had such a great time.

I hadn't been keeping in touch now and again (monthly) with her like I had with A (well A or I had messaged each other), yet met up with her?? With B I actually enjoyed myself immensely and even tho I maybe find A more sweet, B was more easy to talk to. I wish I had a bachelor pad to take her home! We agreed to meet up more often! Had a flirty time.

2. WAS IT A DATE?

B couldn't make that meet up and responded she couldn't to that GROUP chat mentioned earlier. She did go to the 2nd one. Ironically I was going to ask to see her that day. In the meantime we had exchanged one or two flirty text exchanges spaced out about 2-4 weeks apart each time. I messaged her about meeting up 2 weeks after that group meet, but sadly she was busy. She offered me a different time, but I couldn't make it and so I asked about another day . I panicked a bit given she took time to respond to that point, perhaps peeved off? But the convo ended positively saying let's plan it closer to the time and in a flirty way.

I contacted her last week about meeting up and she responded positively and I'm in the process of about to see her alone for lunch again. I had hoped to do an activity but she wasn't free the day I was for a longer visit to the city. So lunch will have to suffice.

Both girls admire and have a solid rapport with me. I am perceived as someone flirty, fun and sweet.

3. WHAT TO DO WITH BOTH GIRL A AND GIRL B?
4. HOW TO HOOK UP?
5. HOW TO JUST HANG OUT/MEET 1 on 1?
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XO For Life
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I think that you should go with Girl A as you have feelings for her and Girl B seems like she cant be bothered to make an effort to see you
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ANM775
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I met these two girls when I was at uni and both were taken. Now they have BECOME SINGLE post graduation. Ironically just after I moved out of the bachelor pad to look after folks outside the city. I have to commute to get in to london where B lives. A lives up north now. I want to meet them for dates and hookup potentially. Advice on both?


GIRL A = cute, sweet, fun in private and extremely pretty. Butterfly feeling. Worked with her on coursework. She admired me a lot/my drive etc. Excellent rapport. Emigrated with bf abroad, kept in touch by text now and then. When she visited, wanted to see me (along with B and other friends). Last time, I met her alone when she was single (and here for 2 hrs) which I didn't know till I was eating with her. Always fancied her a bit. Would love to spend my first time (sex) with her.

She seemed excited to tell me she's moving back here by text about 6 months ago and that she can meet me more often. She texted me on landing back in the UK (she now lives in the north). A usually replies faster than I can type a response and as soon as she sees it. Asked me when I'd be back from a work trip and "hope she could see me soon". Suddenly when I offered as a treat to welcome her back and asked when she was free, she read that msg and blanked it for a MONTH. Then texted me as if she had done nothing wrong asking me how I was and that she'd try to visit london soon. I made a light joke of it about where did she go to. She replied much faster with long spiel about how she is and asked me back. Anyhow I obviously wasn't impressed at the GHOSTING. I replied back and got ghosted again lol. Sigh. Inexplicable given our interactions. She has only done this once before, when I asked her a question, she read it and then gave some vague response nothing to do with what I said a week later. The question at that time was simply asking if she was around in her country when I was on holiday there?!

She texted me again in early december last year saying she'd be in london in early feb and if I wanted to catch up. I thought it was pretty far away and asked her how come she was visiting. (I want to see her ALONE) Kinda said something along the lines of to visit me and some friends. I responded sure, didn't say much more given it was so far away. She wished me xmas and new years wishes first and had a brief flirty convo for a specific conversation. I notice her replies are still long and enthusiastic, but she BLUETICKS me and responds later which she NEVER used to do?? One thing is she can't be busy (no one is and I have a busier job), given her last seen on WhatsApp is actively changing throughout EVERY day and I can see her profile pic is of her on holiday sometimes lol.

Now it was going fine until suddenly a random GROUP CHAT was started by a mutual acquaintance. Let's call her girl C. Now I know her, but I wouldn't call her my friend. Girl C includes about 10 people in the group chat. It's about girl A visiting town, who's free to meet her? Now at the same time girl A had read and not replied to a text from me (again it's so weird her doing that, in the texts back and forth she always is lightning fast). She started replying to that one first! In the event only girl C was free lol. The other 8 ppl were busy. I avoided replying as I wanted to see girl A alone. Girl A did reply to me and said hope she can see me! I responded saying sure, just us, let's do something asking her which day is best on a particular weekend.

She responded FAST saying which is best for me lol. So I gave her the saturday and described what we could do, and when does her train get in. Now she didn't respond for 10 days. This time she apologised and said gets in early, "don't I want the others to come? But sounds a great plan!" I responded saying just want to see her after so long. (I didn't mention the obvious fact that there were no "others", only C). Then when trying to nail down a time, she replied again a week later, asking wouldn't I like to see C too, it'd be more fun with more ppl???! I again said just her. At this point irritated why she's dragging me into other plans. Trouble was on the GROUP CHAT, C starts asking am I free and I didn't want to look bad in front of another girl who I like on there, so said, might be on sat.

At this point no one texts back at all, till A privately messages me "so when are we meeting on sat". I said, "I get in at this time, and you?". No response. WTF? Then randomly 3 days later, and with 4 days to go, she texts me a long spiel with a flirty heyy how do i feel about going to the suburbs (I have to commute far for that) and visiting C, she was thinking of doing that, otherwise C and her would come and see me in london afterwards. So crazy right that she planned that separately I have no idea and she's giving me mixed signals? At this point, I wanted to say no, but gave her one last chance saying something flirty about her changing le plan, "When are you getting the train there". This was on both the group chat to C and privately to A. I got no response from either. At that point I messaged both the group chat and A saying to go ahead and I'll see them around. I ignored the message from A asking why I couldn't come.

Later on A sent holiday wishes to the group chat and flirtily mentioned me directly through an inside joke. That's good isn't it? I responded back directly to her and sent a group message to everyone in general. Then she messaged the group chat talking about a get together. Only 3 ppl were free out of 10. I messaged it saying I'm not free as I didn't want the hassle and I wanna meet her alone.

The only correspondence since was me sending her a flirty birthday text to which she responded within minutes and said "hope she can can see me soon".

1. HOW DO I MEET A ALONE and should I text her now? Was I asking A out both occasions?

GIRL B = cute, more outgoing in general and easier to flirt immediately with. Friends with A. Good rapport. Very bubbly. Kept in touch after by occasional text and saw her maybe once post graduating, though not enough. I did like her and love her laugh and bedroom eyes.

Out of irritation with A ghosting me for that month (see above) before christmas, in december, I messaged B who I normally only see at group meets and asked if she was free in the evening whilst I was visiting. She responded fast. I should mention, usually I have a much faster and longer reply from girl A. But B was giving me flirty responses indeed. She messaged back sure and we arranged a time, and we met up for a long dinner (I paid) and had such a great time.

I hadn't been keeping in touch now and again (monthly) with her like I had with A (well A or I had messaged each other), yet met up with her?? With B I actually enjoyed myself immensely and even tho I maybe find A more sweet, B was more easy to talk to. I wish I had a bachelor pad to take her home! We agreed to meet up more often! Had a flirty time.

2. WAS IT A DATE?

B couldn't make that meet up and responded she couldn't to that GROUP chat mentioned earlier. She did go to the 2nd one. Ironically I was going to ask to see her that day. In the meantime we had exchanged one or two flirty text exchanges spaced out about 2-4 weeks apart each time. I messaged her about meeting up 2 weeks after that group meet, but sadly she was busy. She offered me a different time, but I couldn't make it and so I asked about another day . I panicked a bit given she took time to respond to that point, perhaps peeved off? But the convo ended positively saying let's plan it closer to the time and in a flirty way.

I contacted her last week about meeting up and she responded positively and I'm in the process of about to see her alone for lunch again. I had hoped to do an activity but she wasn't free the day I was for a longer visit to the city. So lunch will have to suffice.

Both girls admire and have a solid rapport with me. I am perceived as someone flirty, fun and sweet.

3. WHAT TO DO WITH BOTH GIRL A AND GIRL B?
4. HOW TO HOOK UP?
5. HOW TO JUST HANG OUT/MEET 1 on 1?



From what you've wrote I'm not really convinced either of these girls are romantically interested in you tbh.

However I suggest you arrange a night out with them, encourage them to to drink [and let go of their inhibitions] and then pick your target and make a move on her once the club gets into full swing and everybody else is getting off with each other. I've seen males with female friends use this tactic time and time and again [often with good results] ...and tbh, right now i think it's your best bet.

if you try and arrange a 1 to 1 meetup with the intention of romance you are going to have to declare your intention first or the girl is going to turn up in "friend" mode and not "date" mode....
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cat_mac
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Girl A definitely isn’t interested, girl B doesn’t seem that bothered but if you have 1:1 time maybe something could develop.

Romantically/sexually, i’d look elsewhere. Get on tinder or go to clubs if you’re just wanting to smash.
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UWS
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(Original post by tiarichards16)
I think that you should go with Girl A as you have feelings for her and Girl B seems like she cant be bothered to make an effort to see you
(Original post by ANM775)
From what you've wrote I'm not really convinced either of these girls are romantically interested in you tbh.

However I suggest you arrange a night out with them, encourage them to to drink [and let go of their inhibitions] and then pick your target and make a move on her once the club gets into full swing and everybody else is getting off with each other. I've seen males with female friends use this tactic time and time and again [often with good results] ...and tbh, right now i think it's your best bet.

if you try and arrange a 1 to 1 meetup with the intention of romance you are going to have to declare your intention first or the girl is going to turn up in "friend" mode and not "date" mode....
(Original post by cat_mac)
Girl A definitely isn’t interested, girl B doesn’t seem that bothered but if you have 1:1 time maybe something could develop.

Romantically/sexually, i’d look elsewhere. Get on tinder or go to clubs if you’re just wanting to smash.
This thread is almost a year old, so I don't think it matters now. Would be interesting to see what OP did in the end though.
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(Original post by UWS)
This thread is almost a year old, so I don't think it matters now. Would be interesting to see what OP did in the end though.
True. I just realised that is almost a year old lol
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(Original post by UWS)
This thread is almost a year old, so I don't think it matters now. Would be interesting to see what OP did in the end though.
Goddamnit. Always check the time stamp :argh:
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ANM775
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(Original post by UWS)
This thread is almost a year old, so I don't think it matters now. Would be interesting to see what OP did in the end though.


Didn't realise it was a bumped thread due to such few posts.......
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(Original post by cat_mac)
Goddamnit. Always check the time stamp :argh:
Will do next time
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