A girl acting horribly after a break-up?

I recently 'broke-up' with somebody who was by all means, my world. She ticked all the boxes. She was kind, caring, attractive and all around nearly perfect. I was sad to have to let her go, but she didn't want to feel tied down to
one person, especially as she is just settling down in a new place (uni).

She spent a long time trying to decide what she wanted, her heart told her one thing while her head told her another, I gave her that time and it messed me up big time over her, now I feel betrayed by this.

While I was VERY upset about it, I finally came to accept that we weren't going any further for the time being, however she insisted that somewhere down the line we could maybe continue, however as much as I liked her, I wasn't going to wait for someone and base what I do around that.

While we were 'together' we hardly ever argued. However, since she suddenly decided to cut me off because she couldn't make her mind up, she was very blunt with me, however what she doesn't know is I am aware that she said she was doing this so she wouldn't take me back. She was always honest with me.

I was obviously upset, I wanted answers and she couldn't really provide them so I told her she needed to leave me alone to get over her.

Since then, she has been horrible, even though not direct, to me. I saw her on a jog and she looked visibly shocked to see me and stopped what she was doing and stared at me, two weeks ago. Recently (last week or so) i've seen her in a shop, which we both looked away from one another. She was in my uni halls the other day for pre-drinks and didn't bother to speak to me, left her alcohol and had to come back to get it the next day.

She has blocked me on all social media since I told her to leave me alone, which I find strange seeing as she instigated the break-up. She unblocked me to get her alcohol as I was the only one in the flat, as soon as I gave it to her all I got was a sarcastic thanks from her and she walked away.

I messaged her after this, saying I was over her and she replied with a 'good for you' and proceeded to block me again.

Why is she acting like this considering this is what she wanted?

This girl was my best friend as well as my lover, it's a pretty big gap we've left in each others lives. We are both in our first year at uni and I do agree with her, we do need to go and find who we are and have our freedom, we're both 20.

What I don't understand is why shes being such a with me? Any suggestions as to why would be much appreciated.



I am over her now, I just don't understand the need to act that way. I do miss having her there, but life is life.

Morning,

You say you're over her but she seems to be persisting back in an uncessary way as a form of attention (maybe she still needs some? from prior experience), if you still have feelings for her and still would want her perhaps try and stop and talk to her and hoenstly say you see shes acting up now. If you can't or this is not wanted just try and leave as much space as possible and just cut her off as this will be both easier for you and her. And perhaps you can be friends further down the line as I once had a huge break after my ex broke up with me due to her old ex. It can be really confusing sometimes the way different people can act and show feelings but I think mayb she is gonig through a healing process too but just in a different way to yourself.

It sounds like you're both just struggling with the break up. It's not 'acting horribly' to not want to see your ex immediately after breaking up and she could have stopped running for a break or because she half hoped you'd go speak to her or something. She blocked you because you didn't want to talk to her again and then again because you said 'I'm over you' when she is clearly trying to move on. Let it go. It's nothing personal she's just dealing with the break up in her own way.

Yeah that's what I thought too. However the mind is a complex thing. What should I do? Because I tend to lash out when someone acts like that with me?

If you talk to her again or see her and she is still acting in a way you personally don't like, then I think it is best to just cut her off as it seems like you are both wounding each other. To you it may seem like she's being horrible or just outright rude but it may just be her way of coping and getting her bottled up feelings out somehow. Just, don't and I mean don't retaliate and start lashing or acting in an inappropiate way back as this will just cause permanent damage for you both.

But, if you have a little break from each other and can get to be able to have a talk perhaps at a park or cafe etc and can be reasonable then perhaps you can stay friends and who knows what for the future Otherwise I would just leave it how it is and it clearly seems to be having a deep impact on you which will just end up growing.

Hope this helps

Yeah I understand, It;'s just a strange thing to deal with, i've been in this situation when i was younger and we did cause permanent damage to one another.

Aww damn I can totally understand, I have seen it happen so many times. I think as long as you can tell her and make sure she hears how you feel and about how's shes being and try and be reasonable with her. If she still acts up then definitely cut her off for now as it's not worth it. Your happiness is worth so much more, you come before all else.

I wish you all the best man