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Is she being bitchy?

So I have known this girl from uni for two years. Unfortunately we met off the uni intranet system, although this is probably best as well because she is the best thing in my social life, yet also the most unique (in bad ways too). I know loads of girls but they're all bitchy etc, so if you think this girl is bad, then she is nothing compared to others I know.

Anyway, in the first year I knew her I was too naive to organise to meet her in person. Last year was my last year at uni and her 2nd, and we got close via msn as we both had relationship issues (difference is, she had a proper r'ship I didn't). I helped her, she helped me and we had some great conversations. I really became fond of her and tried to meet her as we decided to link up, but had so much bad luck and failed (her car broke down, it was snowing too much, she had a group meeting, etc). We met once in March as I helped her with some focus test thing but I had to go - thanks to my naivety and inexperience (long story). Over summer I failed to meet her even though I was meant to play pool with her. I txtd her to say happy birthday on her birthday but she couldn't put my name to a face or remember me (thanks to me leaving at the thing in March). So I realised the only way for her to remember me is to make an impression. Like if I started a fight in front of her, an impression she won't forget is made. If I act normal, she won't remember me.

Last week I said to her I will come uni and meet you (I found out from facebook - the best social aid I have as it's my best source for info - that she is at uni). So I did and she recognised me and approached me as I approached her (either the meeting in March jogged her memory or my facebook pic helped).

Anyway we chatted, she was with a mate, this was in the cantene, and all of a sudden she says bye. What is up with that? I told her the night before that I will be shy (I can tell her anything). Is she being bitchy? She didn't really seem shy.

The only thing she will remember me by is that she thinks I'm rich because of the car my parents have, my height (it's so embarassing being so tall and her being so short in relation), or my quietness and tension thanks to obvious shyness - which probably led to a bad impression and made me look stupid. Over msn she knows I'm clever, funny, load, etc etc but I had no chance to show any of this.

The surreal turn in all of this is that I went home and in the morning of that day, my facebook horoscope changed to say: "dont be offended if someone you know doesn't remember you. Youll definately make an impression this time". I was always thinking that I need to make an impression (a good one...).

Reply 1

Anonymous #1

Bumping this thread.

I guess I can take SOME solace in the fact that I said I wanted to do something and actually achieved it.

What really bugs me is that I've solved worse social issues for my mates but can't solve my own, which are a bit simpler.

I was supposed to play pool with this girl but that fell through because that would have been too convenient for all involved. My dad said I should hook up with a girl so if I played with her, then I'd get practise, play new people (which is a must), and my dad would think I'm socialising and going out with someone (even though it's strictly a friendly thing), but this would be too ideal to ever happen...

Reply 2

Ink

Okay, so let me get this straight....You've known her for two years, but you've only occasionally chatted on the internet, only just added her to facebook, and have only seen her in person once before this - briefly.

And yet, you talk about her like she is one of your best friends ("I can tell her anything.") You seem to think about her quite a bit. It seems like you might have hopes for things developing beyond friendship.

As harsh as this sounds...It seems to be that you are quite desperate to know her and overanalyzing everything. She probably caught onto that. Considering she hardly knows you, maybe she got a bit creeped out?

I don't think she is being a bitch. I just think it's likely that she felt uncomfortable - especially if you were as awkward as you thought.

Have you spoken to her online since? Maybe you could ask her about it yourself.

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

I value her friendship because of all her unconditional help. Most girls would not provide such amount of unconditional help. Without her help my social life would be even worse because she has helped me with girls etc.

Because all our comms are on msn (she doesn't come on as much anymore so we can't talk as much), I have the "msn buddy" stigma which means I don't have the same privileges as her other mates - no phone calling, txt messaging, linking up, etc.

She is very straightforward and genuine, at least from our conversations I have deduced that and she thinks likewise of me, so I want to at least be a normal mate and see her. She wanted to see me and said as much because of the impressions made. She made an effort but I was too naive so I should do the same.

As for wanting something to happen, she would be ideal but she has just come out of a relationship anyway. And I have problems with other girls (which she helped with). If she asks me what I'm up to tomorrow, there is no agenda I have to worry about like with other girls. We all need to socialise with the opposite gender and in my case this is the most genuine girl. Every other girl is just trouble in my social circles. I don't know if