The Student Room Group

Can't pluck up the courage to see the doctor.

This is the third appointment I've missed. I really should go, I think I'm depressed, actually I know I am.

Just that I make the appointments when I'm really bad then when it gets round to going I trick myself into thinking I'm overreacting.

I don't even know what I'm supposed to tell them because it all sounds so attention seeking. The one friend I've confided in checks up on me like I'm a kid, he checks my room for pills and if we go out he watches me so neither of us have a good time. He tries to make me eat food I don't want and I can see him looking at my hands and interrogating me if I have a cut or anything (I work in a kitchen so often have burns and marks on my hands.)
I love him for caring but he's putting it into my head that I'm really unstable and I'm not.
I have good days and bad days, the bad days are really hard. I struggle to do anything and I just want to sit in my room and cry and hurt myself but then I have a few good days where I am just normal and go out and party and have fun then after I sink into despair again.
It does affect me I suppose but I've been living with it all year so I don't need to get help.

I don't know what I'm doing telling the world this, it would just be nice to have some perspective.

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Even though you trick yourself into believing that you're okay, I think you need to see a doctor. That's the only person who can really help you treat your illness. You say you know you're depressed, which really means you know you need to see a doctor. Just make your appointment and even if you feel okay on the day, go and explain to your GP exactly what your symptoms are - and don't play it down, tell him everything.
As for your friend, he can't help worrying and when you're in his position it's so hard to sit back and allow someone you love be in so much pain, and to harm themselves. I can see why it's frustrating you though, and I think the best thing you can do is assure him that you trust him, otherwise you wouldn't have told him in the first place, and tell him you will always let him know if something happens. If you seek help, this will also put your friend's mind at ease a little, as that way he knows that someone other than him is aware of your problems, which will relieve the pressure a bit.
Just think about how awful you feel on your 'bad days', and look to the future - you CAN get better, and with the correct treatment you WILL. Many others have, so don't feel alone. Put yourself and your needs first and get help.
Good luck :smile:
Reply 2
It won't do any harm to see a doctor. If it turns out that you do need further treatment or support then your GP is the best place to start, and if not then at least you'll know that for sure. It certainly won't be a waste of anybody's time. :smile:
Reply 3
It doesn't matter what other people think, only you can know how you feel. I was worried once- I'd read about a form of tablet that helped people with extreme anxiety. I thought I'd be wrong, that I was just diagnosing myself via the internet, but I went to the doctors anyway.

She agreed with me, and I started prozac to reduce anxiety. I was in the same way- I'd feel really bad, then talking about it etc...actually I feel ok, guess it was just that time of the day. I tried to tell myself I was just being stupid, but in the end it's better to just go-

What if you aren't overreacting? You know in yourself you're unhappy. It doesn't matter how many years you go through, it won't get better without action or at least some sort of change.
Reply 4
You may or may not realise it, but a common symptom of depression and mental health is the feeling that you are "wasting people's time" if you seek help, professional or otherwise, for your condition.

Just remember, doctors aren't just there to deal with coughs and colds.

I'd strongly advise you to go to the doctors. If you can't make it on your own, see if your friend will go with you to hold your hand.
Reply 5
Thanks guys, I guess I should just get it over with... but what do I say? Do I just sit down and go 'I'm depressed, fix me'?
I'm rubbish at explaining everything and there are some things I wouldn't even want the doctor to know, things I've done when I'm low (or even happy) that I'm not proud of. :frown:
Reply 6
Anonymous
Do I just sit down and go 'I'm depressed, fix me'?
It's as good a start as any - makes a change when the patient gets to the point early on.
Anonymous
Thanks guys, I guess I should just get it over with... but what do I say? Do I just sit down and go 'I'm depressed, fix me'?
I'm rubbish at explaining everything and there are some things I wouldn't even want the doctor to know, things I've done when I'm low (or even happy) that I'm not proud of. :frown:


You could try what I did, I wrote everything down on a piece of paper, said I wasn't good at explaining and handed him the paper.

It was a million times easier. :smile:
i could have written this, i have no idea where to start either. i'm already on the waiting list for cbt for a phobia so i don't know whether to wait for that to come around.
I dunno if this'll help or not, but my doctors surgery has questionaires (sp??) at reception that you take away with you if you think you're depressed which you then take into your appointment with you and give to your doctor. It's the same one (I think) that the doctor will make you do anyway (or mine did anyway, not sure if it's a standard thing or just something my doctor decided to do!) Giving that in as well as what Anonymous #2 suggested may make it a bit easier for you. I think I had it a bit easy when I went about depression, as I'd asked my counsellor to write to my doctor to describe my symptoms etc as I had no idea what to say and thought I was wasting people's time, but doing that for yourself could be a good step towards getting yourself better?
PM me if you want some moral support :-) xxxx
I don't know if this'll help or not, but my doctors surgery has questionaires (sp??) at reception that you take away with you if you think you're depressed which you then take into your appointment with you and give to your doctor. It's the same one (I think) that the doctor will make you do anyway (or mine did anyway, not sure if it's a standard thing or just something my doctor decided to do!) Giving that in as well as what Anonymous #2 suggested may make it a bit easier for you.
I think I had it a bit easy when I went about depression, as I'd asked my counsellor to write to my doctor to describe my symptoms etc as I had no idea what to say and thought I was wasting people's time, but doing that for yourself could be a good step towards getting yourself better?
PM me if you want some moral support, I know how hard it can be :smile: xxxx
:redface: Sorry for posting twice, not sure what happened :redface:
Reply 12
Anonymous
This is the third appointment I've missed. I really should go, I think I'm depressed, actually I know I am.

Just that I make the appointments when I'm really bad then when it gets round to going I trick myself into thinking I'm overreacting.

I don't even know what I'm supposed to tell them because it all sounds so attention seeking. The one friend I've confided in checks up on me like I'm a kid, he checks my room for pills and if we go out he watches me so neither of us have a good time. He tries to make me eat food I don't want and I can see him looking at my hands and interrogating me if I have a cut or anything (I work in a kitchen so often have burns and marks on my hands.)
I love him for caring but he's putting it into my head that I'm really unstable and I'm not.
I have good days and bad days, the bad days are really hard. I struggle to do anything and I just want to sit in my room and cry and hurt myself but then I have a few good days where I am just normal and go out and party and have fun then after I sink into despair again.
It does affect me I suppose but I've been living with it all year so I don't need to get help.

I don't know what I'm doing telling the world this, it would just be nice to have some perspective.


You sound so much like me it's actually freaky :redface:

Have you tried counselling? I plucked up the courage to go to one at uni and it was quite good (I thought it would make me worse) but my counsellor told me that I should go to the GP at uni aswell..still haven't got brave enough to make an appointment though, and it's for exactly the same reasons as you.

There's no shame in asking for help though and apparently a lot of people go to their GP with depressive symptoms :smile:

so yeh, please don't feel alone. :smile: PM me if you wanna chat, I've foregone the anon :smile:

goodluck :hugs:

xx
Reply 13
One thing I learnt that was very useful. When you go in, don't go er well, you see I think I'm...blah. Go in, and tell the doctor I feel bad, I need help. Don't beat around the bush, just tell the doctor. Saying I think... and so probably puts doubt in the mind of the doctor that you're just putting it on.


That advice helped me a few months ago :smile:
Reply 14
Anonymous
This is the third appointment I've missed. I really should go, I think I'm depressed, actually I know I am.

Just that I make the appointments when I'm really bad then when it gets round to going I trick myself into thinking I'm overreacting.

I don't even know what I'm supposed to tell them because it all sounds so attention seeking. The one friend I've confided in checks up on me like I'm a kid, he checks my room for pills and if we go out he watches me so neither of us have a good time. He tries to make me eat food I don't want and I can see him looking at my hands and interrogating me if I have a cut or anything (I work in a kitchen so often have burns and marks on my hands.)
I love him for caring but he's putting it into my head that I'm really unstable and I'm not.
I have good days and bad days, the bad days are really hard. I struggle to do anything and I just want to sit in my room and cry and hurt myself but then I have a few good days where I am just normal and go out and party and have fun then after I sink into despair again.
It does affect me I suppose but I've been living with it all year so I don't need to get help.

I don't know what I'm doing telling the world this, it would just be nice to have some perspective.


now that was like reading what my head is trying to say...

I didn't have the courage to go to the Doctors in the end. Now, I think I have overcome whatever it was I was going through, but I still sometimes have times when I can just feel myself slipping back... It's strange, because there isn't anything which sets it off... it just happens....

I'm still considering going to the Doctors, but I don't know what for. I'm not depressed anymore(was I even to start with? :s-smilie:). What do I want? Maybe to stop it coming back? But a Doctor can't do that... and anyway... stop what coming back?
Reply 15
Wow, I didn't realise so many people felt like this.
I still don't know what I'm going to do, what is there they can do? I wouldn't be able to talk to a counseller and I don't think giving someone like me drugs is the best of ideas...so meh!
I know how scary it must be, but doctors are only there to help you. I was exactly like you, however I went in the end, and I feel so much better now. I did what some of the others have said, wrote everything down and gave it him - he didnt make a big fuss or anything just took it and read through it, asking a couple of questions.
They may want to prescribe you antidepressants and/or refer you to a counsellor. Although you say you dont think you'd be able to talk to one, you may surprise yourself if you went. I know it's difficult, but I honestly dont think I'd be where I am without going to the doctors.
Feel free to PM me if you want.
Go to the doctor. Please.

I've put off going for nearly a year now. My mum told me to go to the doctor because I've had headaches everyday for the past 5months since having glandular fever. So I went. And straight away the doctor said it wasn't anything to do with the fever, but tension headaches. I've now been referred to the counsellor :s

Please go, in the long run you'll feel better. :smile:
Reply 18
Anonymous
This is the third appointment I've missed. I really should go, I think I'm depressed, actually I know I am.

Just that I make the appointments when I'm really bad then when it gets round to going I trick myself into thinking I'm overreacting.

I don't even know what I'm supposed to tell them because it all sounds so attention seeking. The one friend I've confided in checks up on me like I'm a kid, he checks my room for pills and if we go out he watches me so neither of us have a good time. He tries to make me eat food I don't want and I can see him looking at my hands and interrogating me if I have a cut or anything (I work in a kitchen so often have burns and marks on my hands.)
I love him for caring but he's putting it into my head that I'm really unstable and I'm not.
I have good days and bad days, the bad days are really hard. I struggle to do anything and I just want to sit in my room and cry and hurt myself but then I have a few good days where I am just normal and go out and party and have fun then after I sink into despair again.
It does affect me I suppose but I've been living with it all year so I don't need to get help.

I don't know what I'm doing telling the world this, it would just be nice to have some perspective.


Hey can i just say something which may help i was like this a few years ago, wouldn't eat and harm myself for no reason. But what i found was that i went to the docs and got a diagnosis of what was wrong and how i could improve it. In my case i just needed time with friends and ones that would support me but not check up on me 24/7 and just go out and do thigs e.g. shopping, socialising and having a laugh we're only young once. So i think you should go to the docs it will help and i kno how hard it is wen ur tricking yourself to think that your ok. But its worth it in the long run. I am better and don't do any of them anymore hope this helps.
There's quite a few things they can do including counselling and drugs, but if you're really against the drugs, would you consider homeopathic stuff? Personally, it didn't help me but I know that it does help a lot of people. They'll probably suggest exercise to help rise your mood, I think [correct me if I'm wrong!] that exercise makes your body produce more serotonin or endorphins...can't remember which one...that make you happy. I may be making that up as I go along, but somehow exercise helps!!