The Student Room Group

lack of attention from males at uni

i started uni a few weeks ago and i seem to get zero attention from boys. I go out almost every night and havent even pulled. I used to get quite a lot of attention back home so i find it quite strange. Its not that i want to sleep around or anything like that but it would be nice if a guy would just chat me up or someting-is anyone in the same postion? Im schocked as i thought uni would be great for meetin guys-but i havent met any! Its gettin me reli down especially as im one of the few single girls in my halls and when they have guys round it makes me feel so so lonely. Any advice? whats going on? im at nottingham uni btw. I do french and havent met any guys on my course either. ahh!

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Reply 1
If they're not making the effort, maybe you should? You're clearly not unattractive as you get attention in other places. Maybe they just don't know what to say or something.
I'm at nottingham too and pretty much in the same boat.
Errm... Well, if you're attractive then maybe you're giving off "leave me alone" type signals. I mean, if you hang around in big groups of girls, it's difficult for men to approach you if they don't want the audience during potential rejection.

Go to the bar on your own, make plenty eye contact with men your find attractive. Smile. If you smoke, ask them for one and start up a conversation.

Plenty ways, you just need to be more proactive.
Reply 4
Are you sure you're not just walking around with a '**** off' look emblazoned across your face? Apparently I do it... but then, I don't want to 'pull' :smile:
Anonymous
i started uni a few weeks ago and i seem to get zero attention from boys. /QUOTE]

Have some more fortitude. Some people never get attention from the opposite sex, yet they deal with it no bother.
Well if you were that desperate for their attention maybe dress sluttily and laugh at their jokes, that's something I've witnessed to be a fail-safe option for some people. But bear in mind a lot of men in their first year of uni are just out to have sex with as many girls as possible so think about whether that's the kind of attention you want as it doesn't last much beyond the following morning.

Otherwise, as the person above says, it's not the end of the world. It could be that you aren't their type. Do you have so little confidence in yourself that you depend on the attention of men to bolster your self-esteem?
If they don't approach you try approaching them? Maybe they think you already have a boyfriend.
Maybe it's because you need to make an effort.
yeh i'm at nottingham too, i know exactly what you mean, maybe it's a nottingham thing...
Reply 10
i would never approach a girl if she was with a group of girls. the potential for embarassment is just too great.
Reply 11
Maybe there are loads of guys who want to "pull" you, but don't know how to approach you.

You can't just expect attention to come your way and then whine when you don't get it; being female doesn't mean that all you can ever do is sit back and wait for men to come to you. If you make an effort to give of the right signals and initiate things with men - or at least put yourself in a situation where it's easier for men to initiate things with you - then you're bound to get more attention.
Reply 13
i dnt just sit bk-ive danced reli near guys, smiled at them-even gone up to some,all the usual signs and nothing has developed!
Reply 14
maybe u shud try doin sumthing new with ur hair....and dress to stand out from the crowd but not stand out in a bad way if u no what i mean. oh and dnt act desperate and lonely if u r. try smiling at them, that always works.
Reply 15
why do you want attention thou this much? I mean i can understand you like it but is it that important? try just concentrating on your work and have a good time without worrying and i bet something will come along
Reply 16
I had that last year. I'm not unattractive, and yet attention = 0.

Maybe we're just the unlucky few.
Maybe they just don't like you or just not interested.
Reply 18
some of u r missin my point im nt actin depressed etc im the same as i was bk home and they way i was there seemed to be enough. its my first year i want to have fun and im sorry if some people find it sad but meetin boys is part of the fun!
Anonymous
some of u r missin my point im nt actin depressed etc im the same as i was bk home and they way i was there seemed to be enough. its my first year i want to have fun and im sorry if some people find it sad but meetin boys is part of the fun!


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