Can't communicate

I met this guy at my uni's LGBT society, and I started to really like him. When it started I was too nervous to do anything but go over and hug him, but last thursday we were at a club with a group of friends and ended up dancing and kissing, then walked home together. He's sweet, a good guy, extremely attractive (what the hell is someone who looks like that doing with me etc.) physically and personally; but it's just so difficult to talk.

I'm an extremely quiet and shy person, mainly as a result of years of school bullying and social exclusion; at uni I've gained significantly more confidence but it's still kind of difficult... And with this guy I just can't think of anything to talk about. In the text messages and on facebook it's fine, but otherwise it's just physical- last night we danced and flirted again, and I spent the night at his- again awkward, but good... And now I don't know what to do to make conversation.

Any help please?

Reply 1

James

Go do something with him. It will always be difficult to make conversation until you've got some shared experiences to laugh about.

Reply 2

LinMolko321

Try not to think about it too much. You can make conversation on almost any topic, ask him about his favourites (books, films, cars, food, anything!).

I recently read a fantastic book, 'Social intelligence', the book stated that people much prefer to talk about themselves, and often quieter/shy people are more popular and social than they imagined... Because others perceived them to be interesting to talk to (because they basically could talk about themselves all the time) lol.

Good luck and don't worry too much. It looks to me as though he likes you the way you are :smile:

Reply 3

Tommy Jet

Ah, I have the same problem.
I'm trying so hard to make friends in uni, but being painfully shy, I can't think of a damn thing to say.
The best way to get conversation going is to ask questions, as the previous poster suggested. Ask him aout anything. Once the ice is broken, it'll get easier.
But it does sound as if he likes you very much, so just let it happen naturally.

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

well, I wanted just to talk to him again... He said he's staying in, and I invited him out for a drink with the people from my halls, but he hasn't replied... and I realised it would've been better to do in a call not a text so he wouldn't take it the wrong way, but damn, too late x_x

I dunno, he told me he doesn't want a boyfriend at the moment, I'm okay with that but still want to be friends... but now I probably just came off as clingy. gahhhh :frown: