The Student Room Group

Teacher refused to let daughter go to the toilet

Hi All

Don't know whether to have a word with the teacher or just let it go?

Yesterday my Daughter 7, said as they were coming in from lunch she asked the teacher if she could quickly go to the toilet, but the teacher said no and to sit down. My little girl said she really needed a wee and asked again later on but the teacher said No and that she should have gone at lunch if she is that desperate, you can wait until the end of day. My girl said she was dying to go and had to wait 2 hours, She finally went to the toilet after dismissal.

Is it standard procedure to refuse toilet during lessons? When I was this age we were always allowed to go.

Scroll to see replies

Original post by lucyr23
Hi All

Don't know whether to have a word with the teacher or just let it go?

Yesterday my Daughter 7, said as they were coming in from lunch she asked the teacher if she could quickly go to the toilet, but the teacher said no and to sit down. My little girl said she really needed a wee and asked again later on but the teacher said No and that she should have gone at lunch if she is that desperate, you can wait until the end of day. My girl said she was dying to go and had to wait 2 hours, She finally went to the toilet after dismissal.

Is it standard procedure to refuse toilet during lessons? When I was this age we were always allowed to go.


We have a school policy that we are only allowed to go to the toilet during break and lunch. But cant remember what I had to do during the age your daughter is. I think they shouldve been more lenient though.
Reply 2
When you mean daughter 7, do you mean a daughter age 7 or your 7th daughter? o.o
but that aside, Its not really a rule but lots of schools do it. "You should have gone at break" etc which is kinda bs.
We have it in our school but if your daughter is only 7, then it is a bit crazy forcing her to hold it in.
Yeah, when you have an hour to go to the toilet, you shouldn't be going the second the bell finishes.
I think I would say something, I know it's common for schools to do this (Mainly high schools) since it's disrupting class times but for a 2 hour lesson and no break when she really needed to go at 7 years old seems a little cruel. That being said I do think it's important to make sure you go before class.
Bruh they tell you "you could've just went at lunch, you had all that time" but you've only just wanted a pee after lunch. I would pee in class if that happened. I would pee in the bin.
Reply 6
She is aged 7, and in year 2
Yeah that's standard. Your daughter should have gone in lunch break. Allowing her to go, will open up doors for other students to think it is alright.
However, teacher should have been more lenient and let her go with a word of warning/explanation as to why this shouldn't happen again.
Imo, you should maybe have a word with the teacher...
Reply 8
Honestly she should have gone. 1. She is 7, so they should have been leniant. Even if she was older, only going at break/lunch is a stupid rule. Its not really that distruptive, people don't really plan out when they need to go to the toilet and some schools are quite big. My school has around 1.4k-1.6k others and if we all went at break/lunch, it would be hell.
Complain, 7 is still very young and unless she is at it all the time and this was a one off then I think teacher unreasonable. Schools really do get upset about this and I understand it can lesson disrupt but a balance must be struck. Further, there is a huge chance she could get an infection if left too long or ends up wetting anyway.
Original post by lucyr23
She is aged 7, and in year 2

No hard and fast rules, it's at the teachers discretion.

Usually requests are denied to prevent others from pulling 'copycat' stunts and to send a firm message that break times are the right time to go not when lessons will be disrupted.

Teachers are human too and it's hard enough trying to get them to settle after going hyper' filled up with food and fresh from a rampant playtime.

Kids can be precious little monsters and always three or four in a class trying it on - even at that age and they learn fast how to play the game!

Not saying your daughter is one of those but hey, different teachers will have different ways of dealing with it.

I'd say to tell your daughter gently that she needs to go at break times which are the rules and actually support the teacher doing a very difficult job.

That means a great deal for teachers when a parent uses tough love because classroom management and discipline is hard to maintain at the best of times.
(edited 6 years ago)
I teach year 2 and agree with the teacher she should have gone at lunch. My class are not allowed to go unless they have a medical problem. Explain to your daughter she should use the loo at breaks times
Reply 12
If a teacher was to do this to my kid id tell my kid just to leave the classroom and go whenever they felt the need to, I definitely would not stand for my kid being told to wait. I would personally make sure I contacted the teacher to tell her I'd report them if they decided to do that to them again. They can't decide to deny a child the ability to go to toilet, it's a natural response everyone needs to go sometimes. She should understand that
I would speak to her. I teach (adults right now but kids in the past) and while I know it's annoying for kids to be leaving for the loo and yes they should go at break - it's just not helpful or realistic to ban them. It takes 2 minutes to go and pee quickly but they won't concentrate if they're holding it in - and sometimes it just comes on quickly (or they lose track of time)! Plus this kid is SEVEN - an accident is still a real possibility at that age if she's holding it in for 2 hours, which would have been humiliating for her. I only banned kids from going to the toilet if they were going every lesson/taking 5+ minutes without a medical note. I find it a stupid concept to be honest - as an adult I would go pee whenever I need to and in 95% of workplaces it's not a big deal to leave your workplace to pee.
Holding it in for hours if you need to go for a wee is detrimental to your health; it can cause urinary tract infections, and long term, cystitis, which can be extremely painful and debilitating. I would speak to the teacher. If you've got to go, you've got to go! It's all well and good those saying your child should have gone earlier in break time; but she's 7! What 7 year old do you know that thinks things through like that??
it's common to not be allowed to go during lessons and yes ppl should go during their lunch or break but given your daughter's age she should have been allowed to go and given an explanation as to why she should go during her lunch/ break next time, you should have a word with the teacher.
That is horrible. We didn't have any stupid rule like that in my primary school. If you need a wee you need a wee? I think it's disgusting for a teacher to tell a child she can't go to the toilet and make her wait 2 hours knowing she's desperate. Like others have said you might not have needed the loo all lunch time, it's not like you have a drink and it goes straight through. Would definitely complain, poor girl.

[e] Also are the children allowed to drink water in their classes then? Because they should be allowed to. And if they're allowed to, it's feasible they're going to need the loo at some point during a 2 hour period. These rules are so ridiculous especially for small children??
(edited 6 years ago)
At my primary school we were allowed to go to the toilet whenever we wanted, we just had to ask politely. I think its far too cruel to make a 7 year old wait, especially for 2 hours, I'd struggle to wait that long to use the loo even if I'd been at lunch.
I always make my year 2 class wait until break and lunch and have never had any complaints or accidents, if she needed the loo as she came in she must have needed it at lunchtime, so should have gone.

If you let one go they all want to go so it is easier just to say no. At the start of the year I always ask parents if their child has any toileting problems and they are allowed to go, but the rest of the children have to wait.

No matter how desperate I am I have to wait for breaks as I cannot leave the children
(edited 6 years ago)
Why did she go into class and ask anyway? Why not just go to the toilet on the way

Latest