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Just don't feel like seeing my boyfriend...
I was just wondering...is it weird that I don't feel like seeing my boyfriend? He pretty much always want's to see me (like everyday) but I dont feel the same way. I've always been a very independant person, so I'm wondering if thats what this is....
For example, he wants to go to a concert with me tonight but I'd rather not go....I used to "need" to see him every day, but recently it's like I've been in a "funk". There's nothing there between us which I believe any longer ties us together; if that makes any sense.
Is this the end of our relationship I wonder?
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Sorry if it feels like this post goes nowhere, but I just needed to write down and voice my thoughts
lease keep anon as my bf checks this website as well:
For example, he wants to go to a concert with me tonight but I'd rather not go....I used to "need" to see him every day, but recently it's like I've been in a "funk". There's nothing there between us which I believe any longer ties us together; if that makes any sense.
Is this the end of our relationship I wonder?
------
Sorry if it feels like this post goes nowhere, but I just needed to write down and voice my thoughts
lease keep anon as my bf checks this website as well:
How long have you two been together?
Perhaps you are just going through a rough patch?
Perhaps you are just going through a rough patch?
We've been together just over 5 months...I was thinking the same thing. But sometime's he just sooo needy. And when we're in public he always has to have his hands on me (my neck, my butt) and it's like he has this need to posses. ughhh I don't know. This never used to bother me
Yeah problem is if he's needy it is a turn off, you need to explain to him that him being like this is putting you off. Afterall you can't be expected to see him every single day, you got to have a life as well. He needs to realise that.
Anonymous
We've been together just over 5 months...I was thinking the same thing. But sometime's he just sooo needy. And when we're in public he always has to have his hands on me (my neck, my butt) and it's like he has this need to posses. ughhh I don't know. This never used to bother me
You know he may just like having you in his arms or just being in physical contact with you. Like when me and my ex used to go out i'd just put my arm around her or hold her hand or whatever, to show my affection/love for her. But I think I can see where your coming from; Does he have his hands on you to show affection or it more of a need to show how you're, in a sense, his?
Have you actually talked to him about this? I always find that its better to get your feelings out in the open because keeping them all locked up inside can create an unbearable tension (Well, I find it unbearable anyway). At least you two could discuss things then. And if you did decide to split up you could at least try and keep it on friendly terms
.Best thing you can do is talk to HIM about how you're feeling.
Hope this helps
Hmmm. Sounds a bit dodgy. Do you EVER want to see him?
I felt exactly the same about my ex boyfriend, he'd want to see me everyday but i just didnt feel like it most of the time, and like yours he was always trying to hold my hand/have his arm around me/something in public and it just annoyed the hell out of me!!
Basically this was happening for a very long time (we were together for 3 years, i felt like this after about a year though...) so in the end i ended it and its the best thing i've done. (and should have done sooner) it just wasnt working out, but i thought in time it would get better again which it mever did.
Im not saying this is gonna happen to you as you've only been together 5 months, but if you dont feel like seeing him now, then is it really going to change? best thing is to talk to him about him and try to work through it or see why you dont feel like seeing him, and take it from there.
Basically this was happening for a very long time (we were together for 3 years, i felt like this after about a year though...) so in the end i ended it and its the best thing i've done. (and should have done sooner) it just wasnt working out, but i thought in time it would get better again which it mever did.
Im not saying this is gonna happen to you as you've only been together 5 months, but if you dont feel like seeing him now, then is it really going to change? best thing is to talk to him about him and try to work through it or see why you dont feel like seeing him, and take it from there.
Zuluana
he was always trying to hold my hand/have his arm around me/something in public and it just annoyed the hell out of me!!
I was just wondering why it annoys you so much? I was under the general impression that most girls liked holding hands and the such.
I feel like this about my boyfriend sometimes. I'm quite introverted and need a lot of alone time; he is also not particularly sociable but for some reason never feels tired of my company in the way I do of his. We've been together for a little over 2 years and have had a few rough patches, but it hasn't got to the point where I've wanted to break up with him for a long time now. It seems that for you, his clingy behaviour is only part of the problem. When you say that there's nothing between you that ties you together, that sounds like another issue - do you love him? Find him sexually attractive? I believe that the neediness is something that can be dealt with if it's the only problem you have - I just made it very clear to my BF that he had to stop being so possessive, which included giving me time alone, and not being all over me when we're out with friends (so embarrassing for them!). If you can talk to him about his behaviour it may improve things. But do you think you'd honestly still want to be with him anyway?
Anonymous
We've been together just over 5 months...I was thinking the same thing. But sometime's he just sooo needy. And when we're in public he always has to have his hands on me (my neck, my butt) and it's like he has this need to posses. ughhh I don't know. This never used to bother me
He sounds confused to me and nevous withit!! ^
I feel like this with every "relationship" I get into after about three weeks and I always just end it so I'm probably not the best for advice....
However, how about (the cliche) making a list of all the things that attracted you to him in the first place? Why did you used to need him in the past? Maybe you'll be reminded.
Otherwise, just end it, there's no point in being unhappy.
However, how about (the cliche) making a list of all the things that attracted you to him in the first place? Why did you used to need him in the past? Maybe you'll be reminded.
Otherwise, just end it, there's no point in being unhappy.
Innuendo_anonymous
I was just wondering why it annoys you so much? I was under the general impression that most girls liked holding hands and the such.
Well the way my ex did it was in quite a posessive way, if he had his arm around me while walking, he'd just kind of be pushing me along so to speak or if he wanted to go a certain direction he'd literally pull me instead of say "lets go this way" and that did annoy me. i told him a few times to stop it but he never would..
But in general holding hands etc i do like, and im sure most girls do really, just not in the way i said above.
Zuluana
Well the way my ex did it was in quite a posessive way, if he had his arm around me while walking, he'd just kind of be pushing me along so to speak or if he wanted to go a certain direction he'd literally pull me instead of say "lets go this way" and that did annoy me. i told him a few times to stop it but he never would..
But in general holding hands etc i do like, and im sure most girls do really, just not in the way i said above.
But in general holding hands etc i do like, and im sure most girls do really, just not in the way i said above.
Ahh thats fair enough. I can't see that being yanked/shoved around like a doll would be fun for any girl, or guy for that matter.
I have the same problem with my boyfriend, we live far apart and he always wants to see me; asking when can we hang out or if I can sneak out. I understand yes we are in a relationship but it's every day all day long, and I tell him I have a personal life and he says yeah I know but I wish we can see each other every day (on-call every day, all day). my parents are strict and have rules that he says he understands but clearly doesn't. i don't know i saw this and felt like ranting, I'm so used to being alone and having someone constantly bothers me all the time just annoys me then he gets mad and i'm the bad guy.
Original post by sara_vin
I feel like this about my boyfriend sometimes. I'm quite introverted and need a lot of alone time; he is also not particularly sociable but for some reason never feels tired of my company in the way I do of his. We've been together for a little over 2 years and have had a few rough patches, but it hasn't got to the point where I've wanted to break up with him for a long time now. It seems that for you, his clingy behaviour is only part of the problem. When you say that there's nothing between you that ties you together, that sounds like another issue - do you love him? Find him sexually attractive? I believe that the neediness is something that can be dealt with if it's the only problem you have - I just made it very clear to my BF that he had to stop being so possessive, which included giving me time alone, and not being all over me when we're out with friends (so embarrassing for them!). If you can talk to him about his behaviour it may improve things. But do you think you'd honestly still want to be with him anyway?
what if he doesn't listen? my boyfriend says he understands but clearly doesn't and never gives me my space.
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- The Long Distance Relationship Society Advice Centre Mark II
- I have a BF... but I'm starting to fancy women?
- What do you think about this?
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