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Got a bit drunk with best friend, and it all came out
I just do not know what to do, have a female in my life who i just have this amazing friendship with,she's just so kind and helpful... And i know, she knows i'm completely in love with her..... She understands exactly how i feel, she knows that i've never been able to get as close to a friend as i am to her and as of that it's very hard for me not too see her as anything else. Last night was odd, we were downing pints of IPA before going to some club and she just turned around and told me in the taxi 'WOW, it's only been a year since we met and our friendship just seems so strong' i gave her a little hug and said 'hell, yeh!'.
But then after a few more pints and she told me she had feelings for one of her friends and i basically told her i was still mad about her, and she was amazingly understanding, she said she really understands how difficult it is for me and she realises why i find it hard to accept our friendship as a friendship...... blah blah, anyway she helps me home and i say something about it again and tell her something like 'why can't you have a cock?? it'll make things so much easier!', and shes like 'we've been through this, i know its hard for you, you're my best friend ted, nothing more, nothing less, you're drunk and about to say something you'll regret, goodnight ted , see you on monday *hug*'.
Stalemate, its been this way for a year, she's too precious to lose, too wonderful not to love. Plus now i'm kind of jealous of this other guy, oh god, this sucks! What to do?? I just don't get excited over other women any more!
What makes it worse is even being at uni we're somehow now 'family friends' our sisters facebook each other and if we decided to quit it could seem very odd
But then after a few more pints and she told me she had feelings for one of her friends and i basically told her i was still mad about her, and she was amazingly understanding, she said she really understands how difficult it is for me and she realises why i find it hard to accept our friendship as a friendship...... blah blah, anyway she helps me home and i say something about it again and tell her something like 'why can't you have a cock?? it'll make things so much easier!', and shes like 'we've been through this, i know its hard for you, you're my best friend ted, nothing more, nothing less, you're drunk and about to say something you'll regret, goodnight ted , see you on monday *hug*'.
Stalemate, its been this way for a year, she's too precious to lose, too wonderful not to love. Plus now i'm kind of jealous of this other guy, oh god, this sucks! What to do?? I just don't get excited over other women any more!
What makes it worse is even being at uni we're somehow now 'family friends' our sisters facebook each other and if we decided to quit it could seem very odd
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Angelil
tbh she sounds very understanding and I don't think you have anything to worry about.
She loves you, just not in the way you want. 
What exactly do you want us to say here?
Ways of making her love you? Try date rape drugs.
Ways of getting over her quickly? I dunno - Heroin?
Short of that, I doubt you're going to get anywhere. Give it some time, you'll grow up a bit and realise that you don't actually 'love every atom in her body', it's just you're hormones really really really wanting to have sex.
Ways of making her love you? Try date rape drugs.
Ways of getting over her quickly? I dunno - Heroin?
Short of that, I doubt you're going to get anywhere. Give it some time, you'll grow up a bit and realise that you don't actually 'love every atom in her body', it's just you're hormones really really really wanting to have sex.
littleperson
She loves you, just not in the way you want.
I mean, not every friend puts up with what she does from me and still tells me i'm her best friend! Maybe i've just got to find a casual relationship and build on that, but it seems like 'oh, i might as well just knock one off then'
I think she knows exactly how you feel, and is dealing with that really well. She sounds like a decent friend, dont lose that by always wanting more, you will regret it. Love her enough to respect what she wants, be that someone else or not, and try to move on. Get some space and meet some more people, but it will take time.
The only cure for this is to go out and meet more girls. You're bound to find someone better.
Good luck!
Good luck!
I've had the same problem recently. I too haven't been able to get close to people and there is one girl at uni who I just click with, and I was totally in love with. However, since she started going out with another guy I've had to move one. It's difficult and it can take a long time- I took five months of them being together and it was only after I saw them together that I accepted it- but it will happen. All the best mate.
She was showing me photos from a recent social and everyones like jeans and tshirt, shes like in make-up and dress....... Before the drinking she just said 'Oh, just fancied looking tarty for a change' (the most un-her thing shes ever said)... But then I realised....... him. Thats another worry, he's a friend and it would be so easy for me to treat him like crap now.
But i think now i've just got to go on persuit of sex and forget about having feelings.
But i think now i've just got to go on persuit of sex and forget about having feelings.
**** me sunshine, you sound like a sack of self-simpering crap. Put your hat back on, buck the **** up and ride off, because if you don't, you'll just look back and curse every day you wasted sticking with it when you already knew it was shot to bits. Dust yourself off and stop feeling so bloody sorry for yourself.
i did a similiar thing i got wrecked told her how when she talks about other lads she likes it makes me jealous and generally pisses me off, she brings the best out of me, she makes me happy, she's more beautiful than she could ever know and that i'm finding it extremely hard to be a good friend as really i want more than that.
we did'nt speak about it again, then she set me up on a date with her mate (well we were in a group and she paired me off ) i did'nt really like the girl(girl b), one thing led to another and we started just snoggin. then she started gettin jealous of the fact i was with her mate. TYPICAL WOMAN! so then one night when we were all out i went to go for a cig with my female(girl A) friend alone. she then told me how she hated being the middle man between me and her mate(who i had no feelings for) and that she misses the attention i gave her.
i wasn't even drunk at this point and almost word for word said "that time i got pissed i made things very clear about my feelings towards you, how much i like you, how i felt about the whole situation and that your still is my number one girl , that i love spending time with you and you make me feel like lifes worth living"
she then said" you didn't make it clear" followed by "i did'nt know that".
typical fookin woman!!!!
we did'nt speak about it again, then she set me up on a date with her mate (well we were in a group and she paired me off ) i did'nt really like the girl(girl b), one thing led to another and we started just snoggin. then she started gettin jealous of the fact i was with her mate. TYPICAL WOMAN! so then one night when we were all out i went to go for a cig with my female(girl A) friend alone. she then told me how she hated being the middle man between me and her mate(who i had no feelings for) and that she misses the attention i gave her.
i wasn't even drunk at this point and almost word for word said "that time i got pissed i made things very clear about my feelings towards you, how much i like you, how i felt about the whole situation and that your still is my number one girl , that i love spending time with you and you make me feel like lifes worth living"
she then said" you didn't make it clear" followed by "i did'nt know that".
typical fookin woman!!!!
They say the truth comes out when you have had a few drinks.
Anonymous
I just do not know what to do, have a female in my life who i just have this amazing friendship with,she's just so kind and helpful... And i know, she knows i'm completely in love with her..... She understands exactly how i feel, she knows that i've never been able to get as close to a friend as i am to her and as of that it's very hard for me not too see her as anything else. Last night was odd, we were downing pints of IPA before going to some club and she just turned around and told me in the taxi 'WOW, it's only been a year since we met and our friendship just seems so strong' i gave her a little hug and said 'hell, yeh!'.
But then after a few more pints and she told me she had feelings for one of her friends and i basically told her i was still mad about her, and she was amazingly understanding, she said she really understands how difficult it is for me and she realises why i find it hard to accept our friendship as a friendship...... blah blah, anyway she helps me home and i say something about it again and tell her something like 'why can't you have a cock?? it'll make things so much easier!', and shes like 'we've been through this, i know its hard for you, you're my best friend ted, nothing more, nothing less, you're drunk and about to say something you'll regret, goodnight ted , see you on monday *hug*'.
Stalemate, its been this way for a year, she's too precious to lose, too wonderful not to love. Plus now i'm kind of jealous of this other guy, oh god, this sucks! What to do?? I just don't get excited over other women any more!
What makes it worse is even being at uni we're somehow now 'family friends' our sisters facebook each other and if we decided to quit it could seem very odd
But then after a few more pints and she told me she had feelings for one of her friends and i basically told her i was still mad about her, and she was amazingly understanding, she said she really understands how difficult it is for me and she realises why i find it hard to accept our friendship as a friendship...... blah blah, anyway she helps me home and i say something about it again and tell her something like 'why can't you have a cock?? it'll make things so much easier!', and shes like 'we've been through this, i know its hard for you, you're my best friend ted, nothing more, nothing less, you're drunk and about to say something you'll regret, goodnight ted , see you on monday *hug*'.
Stalemate, its been this way for a year, she's too precious to lose, too wonderful not to love. Plus now i'm kind of jealous of this other guy, oh god, this sucks! What to do?? I just don't get excited over other women any more!
What makes it worse is even being at uni we're somehow now 'family friends' our sisters facebook each other and if we decided to quit it could seem very odd
You have roughly 0% chance of ever having this girl feel attracted to you. Why? Because you have shown her just about every characteristic that girls dislike in a man (unless he's 'just a friend' of course).
Now, I have said you have 0% chance and that's because it sounds as though you have been, quite frankly, a walking, talking, cry-baby of a train wreck around her.
If you'd been a little less feminine thus far, I might have put it up to 5%. Maybe.
What I would have told you to do then is this: find another girl - in fact a string of girls - and flaunt them around the friend, start teasing her (lots), stop doing whatever she tells you, make her qualify herself to you, value yourself and your time and show her that you do so, become more interesting (do interesting things etc), become less available to her, tell her how much she should go out with this guy and how you think they'd make a perfect couple. In fact, take all those ideas and think about what kind of attitude they represent and then apply that attitude to all your interactions with her.
Of course, that's for someone who has 5% chance. You're on 0%. Sorry.
Maybe just find someone else?
I'm afraid I have to side with some of the more blunt responses here.
Have some self-respect. It is not a healthy basis for a relationship to be this obsessed over a person, even if they did happen to like you in return. You'll only ever get into a relationship once you've got a life of your own and are not entirely emotionally reliant on the other person. Moreover, it's simply a healthier way to exist and you'll likely be happier with yourself.
So, in conclusion, get a life. Really. I'll bet she's bloody ugly as well...
Have some self-respect. It is not a healthy basis for a relationship to be this obsessed over a person, even if they did happen to like you in return. You'll only ever get into a relationship once you've got a life of your own and are not entirely emotionally reliant on the other person. Moreover, it's simply a healthier way to exist and you'll likely be happier with yourself.
So, in conclusion, get a life. Really. I'll bet she's bloody ugly as well...
bosejiu
oh, difficult situation, like in Goethe's "The Sorrows of Young Werter". I don't have idea how you should solve the problem, but do not try Werter's solution 
**** that - Werther knew what he was doing. Now, you've just got to get hold of a set of 18th Century duelling pistols...
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