Feeling extremely upset and worried...

before I came to university, honestly I didn't have any real friends besides people I knew online from other countries. I've settled in here, but I just feel left out and depressed. I gained quite a bit of confidence somehow, and have managed to get to know some people who I would like to be friends with... But there's just several big problems.

There's a group of people in my halls I've been hanging around with regularly, and I get on with most of them (mainly the girls)... But last night, I was extremely drunk, and without meaning to ended up touching one of the guys (a straight guy) inappropriately. He didn't say anything about it or try to stop me, so I didn't realise he didn't like it until he and one of the girls ran off into another person's room and she told me to go to bed. Apparently he was really scared and now it's like a huge wedge was driven in pushing me out from the whole group. I did hang around with one of them today, and she said she'd talk to him to apologise for me. I didn't mean it, I'm not even attracted to the guy, but it still happened, and I don't know what to do or what they'll do now- phase me out or what...

They've gone to the pub while I stay here so she can talk to him, haven't heard back from her yet...

There's this other group too, that I'm kind of on the outskirts of- a big group of people from the university's LGBT society... One of the main problems there is that everyone lives separately. One girl I made good friends with who I could probably go to is unfortunately away back home tonight... One of the guys went to see a movie with his friend, but wants to see me tomorrow apparently. The others... Well, they all live further away from those two. Some of them went out tonight, and the girl who brought it up gave an open invitation on facebook, but I don't wanna just turn up because I know that one guy really doesn't like me who's going, and I think maybe some of the others don't, or he'll get them not to... I tried ringing the girl half an hour ago (about the same time she stated for meeting) but she didn't pick up.

I just... I want to be able to be proper friends with people, who I can talk to easily and rely on and know they're honest with me and care about me... But at the moment I'm just on the outside and don't know what to do. It feels even worse than how depressed I felt before I came, when I used to spend the days in college barely talking and the nights just inside on the computer all the time, and now I'm worried suicide thoughts will come... v_v

Reply 1

Sikthchick

Ok firstly, you realised your mistake but touching this guy but maybe instead of getting people to appologise for you you should do it yourself. I'm sure he would much rather hear it from you and then that way you can settle things maturely.

We all do stupid things when we are drunk... hell i know i have but aslong as we acknowledge it and appologise then the more chance we have of making the situation better. You can't ignore this guy just because of one incident. Fair enough he was scared but I'm sure if you explain yourself then things will be a lot easier.

As for this other group. If this one guy really has the means of makig people dislike you then those people obviously lack a backbone. Don't let one person stop you from doing what you want to do. Talk to these people more and get socialising and they will become better friends.

I spent two years of college not really talking to anyone and spending breaks and free periods in the darkroom or sitting in the library doing work. It does get you down and I've learnt that i need to put something in in order to get something out.

Don't sit on the computer all night, go out join a club, anything but sit on your own. Try talking to someone new at uni, arrange a night out yourself. Doors will start opening hun, you just have to work a little.