Doubts about marrying my fiancee.

This sounds like one of those 'grass is greener on the other side' type things. If your already engaged you should probably try working things out with your fiancee first to be honest, maybe try and remember the reasons why your together in the first place? And to be fair, this other girl doesnt sound too amazing, not exactly the faithful type by the sounds of it! She was cheating on her boyfriend with you, who she ended up picking anyway... and now Im assuming she knows your engaged to someone and she's giving you her mobile number? I wouldnt meet up with her in secret either, imagine how your fiancee would feel if she found out! Oh and Ive never been in this situation personally, but I think its perfectly normal to have doubts from time to time

I agree just try to remember that relationships aren't all based on lust and do take some effort. If you care for your fiancee and you are good friends then you can make thing work. Good luck!

Basically the fling with Abbie happened about 2/3 years ago, just before I was with Holly. We met through a friend and got on really well, I have actually never met anyone else like her before. She had a boyfriend at the time but didn't let me know about it until a few weeks into the fling. We carried on seeing eachother, having sex etc until it all came to a head over her refusal to choose between me or him.

I think it's always a good rule that if you're unsure about a relationship that you're in, you should ignore all other possible relationships - that is, decide about your relationship with Holly as if Abbie doesn't exist, because thinking about what could be could cause you to destroy a good relationship for something that might never happen. What you need to decide is not whether you want to be with Abbie but whether you want to stay with Holly or not.

Firstly, it's totally normal to have doubts about any relationship. You're only human and you can't expect to feel exactly the same way all the time. The main thing is to decide whether Holly is actually the right girl for you - do you love her? Do you want to be with her? Can you see yourself having children and growing old with her? If the answer to these questions is no then maybe you shouldn't be with Holly, or perhaps you just shouldn't be engaged. Maybe the engagement is putting pressure on you and making you feel trapped. Would you feel the same way if you were just boyfriend and girlfriend? Are you just having cold feet or do you really think the relationship isn't right for you? Sorry for bombarding you with questions but you do really need to think about this. A good relationship is precious and you shouldn't throw it away. You need to think about whether you're just having a "grass is always greener" moment or whether you do really want to end it with Holly.

I speak from experience - I got engaged at 19, totally freaked out and broke up with my fiance, then realised I didn't want to break up, I just couldn't handle the pressure of being engaged so young. Luckily he took me back and six years on we're still together and getting married next year, but I think my case was an unusual one - normally when you break someone's trust like that they don't take you back so you have to think long and hard before you do something you might regret. Yes you're bound to think from time to time "what if I went out with that person" or "what if I was single?" but you have to commit to one thing or the other and decide who is right for you - don't let what might be destroy what you actually have.