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University relationship?
Okay I'll outline the story.
Basically I started Uni a few weeks ago. I've had the time of my life so far, I love pretty much everything about it from the freedom of being independent, to going out on the lash every night. But then the complication came. A week ago I got off with this girl from my course. I didn't know what to think at the time, but I wasn't totally drunk, and I did Like her. A couple of days later and I see her down the union. We sort of pretended as though nothing happened (like during lectures, although everyone else had started to talk about us by then) but we got along really well, and guess what, the same thing happened again, back in the common room. This time I was even more sober than the time before, likewise so was she. What this basically means is that I intentionally tried it on with her because I like her, which I genuinely do. From this point, the same sort of routine just continues up until today (you know, flirting, spending more time with here etc).
The main thing is, I'm not sure how to play it from here, and I need help. She's just texted me to say she really likes me, although to be honest it's hardly been subtle with everyone talking about it! What do I do from here? I could enter a relationship with her now which would be the most obvious choice, or I could back away a bit. In so many ways I'd love to be with her, but at the same time it would be really really weird. By this I mean things like: She's on my course so we'd see alot of each other which would be strange - I have all guys in my kitchen at halls so it's got a bit of a laddish atmosphere where I've gotten a bit of a reputation for being a flirt on nights out (will I lose all this fun?)
A final point is perhaps rather stupid, but serious. Basically, she's slightly overweight. By this I mean she's got a little puppy fat on her chin and stomach. I personally really couldn't care less about this. I really like her for who she is, She's a lovely cute girl with an ace personality - and I can imagine being with her. But at the same time I'm slightly worried about what other people will think (i.e. one of my kitchen mates saw me with her and said to me the next day "what were you doing getting off with that fat bird minger"
). I mean, will people say nasty comments about us behind our backs? Will her body shape be the first thing my parents notice when I take her to my place etc? I know I shouldn't really be worrying about this but I'd like some advice.
Likewise the rest of the questions. If anyone has any advice to give me I'd be greatly appreciative. Cheers.
Basically I started Uni a few weeks ago. I've had the time of my life so far, I love pretty much everything about it from the freedom of being independent, to going out on the lash every night. But then the complication came. A week ago I got off with this girl from my course. I didn't know what to think at the time, but I wasn't totally drunk, and I did Like her. A couple of days later and I see her down the union. We sort of pretended as though nothing happened (like during lectures, although everyone else had started to talk about us by then) but we got along really well, and guess what, the same thing happened again, back in the common room. This time I was even more sober than the time before, likewise so was she. What this basically means is that I intentionally tried it on with her because I like her, which I genuinely do. From this point, the same sort of routine just continues up until today (you know, flirting, spending more time with here etc).
The main thing is, I'm not sure how to play it from here, and I need help. She's just texted me to say she really likes me, although to be honest it's hardly been subtle with everyone talking about it! What do I do from here? I could enter a relationship with her now which would be the most obvious choice, or I could back away a bit. In so many ways I'd love to be with her, but at the same time it would be really really weird. By this I mean things like: She's on my course so we'd see alot of each other which would be strange - I have all guys in my kitchen at halls so it's got a bit of a laddish atmosphere where I've gotten a bit of a reputation for being a flirt on nights out (will I lose all this fun?)
A final point is perhaps rather stupid, but serious. Basically, she's slightly overweight. By this I mean she's got a little puppy fat on her chin and stomach. I personally really couldn't care less about this. I really like her for who she is, She's a lovely cute girl with an ace personality - and I can imagine being with her. But at the same time I'm slightly worried about what other people will think (i.e. one of my kitchen mates saw me with her and said to me the next day "what were you doing getting off with that fat bird minger"
). I mean, will people say nasty comments about us behind our backs? Will her body shape be the first thing my parents notice when I take her to my place etc? I know I shouldn't really be worrying about this but I'd like some advice.Likewise the rest of the questions. If anyone has any advice to give me I'd be greatly appreciative. Cheers.
Reply 1
*******s to your mates and anyone who says anything about her size.
My boyfriend and I were at school together so spent most of everyday together up until we left for uni, and it was just normal. If you want to try it go for it; she probably has a few reservations too, so test the water and see if you like it!
My boyfriend and I were at school together so spent most of everyday together up until we left for uni, and it was just normal. If you want to try it go for it; she probably has a few reservations too, so test the water and see if you like it!
Your mates can go **** themselves. How is it any of their business who you like?
As for the 'losing out on fun' thing, just ask yourself what you value more (fun or a relationship?) - I'm sure deep down you know the answer.
And as for being on the same course, I don't think it really matters - I know people who even went out with their flatmates, which imo can be even worse than being on the same course!
Good luck with it.
As for the 'losing out on fun' thing, just ask yourself what you value more (fun or a relationship?) - I'm sure deep down you know the answer.
And as for being on the same course, I don't think it really matters - I know people who even went out with their flatmates, which imo can be even worse than being on the same course!
Good luck with it.
Reply 3
If you like her, it must be worth a try 
Reply 6
Why should it bother you what anyone else says about her? If you're shallow enough to avoid a relationship with a girl just because your mates might make negative comments about her appearance then she's better off without you.
Reply 7
I'm not sure, I think you should go for it.
Reply 8
I admit it - In the past I have been too critical and have over-analysed things to the point of looking for excuses not to be with someone.
Thanks for the responses so far. Pretty much what I was expecting/hoping to hear.
Thanks for the responses so far. Pretty much what I was expecting/hoping to hear.
Reply 9
Don't go out with her if you're going to get embarrassed. Relationships are for mature people after all.
Reply 10
Schokis
Don't go out with her if you're going to get embarrassed. Relationships are for mature people after all.
if shes too fat forget it!
otherwise yer mates would grill you - i hate that
Reply 11
It is up to you, but you'd be very shallow to follow your mates advice.
Reply 12
Rock Fan
It is up to you, but you'd be very shallow to follow your mates advice.
yer but she might be too overweight
Reply 13
If you like this girl alot - go for it. However dont let you ****** house/flat mates sway your opinion on your choice.
Reply 14
tbh i think everyone is shallow to some extent, so the fact you worry about what your mates say is fine.
plus if he had he round his place, she might feel uncomfortable with what they might think/say/act around her.
friends can influence things like this alot, as most people do care about what others think.
anyway, to the point. i think if you really do like her, just ignore what everyone says, or talk to them about it and tell them they shouldnt have a problem with her, especially your parents!
similar to what Angelil said, think about what you value more. mates, having freedom, fun & your "reputation" or a relationship with the chance of having something really special.
plus if he had he round his place, she might feel uncomfortable with what they might think/say/act around her.
friends can influence things like this alot, as most people do care about what others think.
anyway, to the point. i think if you really do like her, just ignore what everyone says, or talk to them about it and tell them they shouldnt have a problem with her, especially your parents!
similar to what Angelil said, think about what you value more. mates, having freedom, fun & your "reputation" or a relationship with the chance of having something really special.
Reply 16
You like this girl right?
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- University relationships
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- Networking and Career preparation
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