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Need a new coping mechanism. Ideas?
I'm thoroughly bored with life.
I recently separated from my fiance and got with a girl straight after whom I ended up falling for but that didnt work out either for various reasons so love life is pretty much zero.
I was originally taking a year off uni to get married and do the family thing. Since that part of my life didnt happen I managed to get myself back into uni but much of the course I am doing I'm really not interested in as a result.
I've made a few friends since I got back to uni - I joined the archery club. The whole things getting to be a little bit tedious though. Shoot for 2 hours then go down the pub.
I avoid going out to nightclubs because I'm pretty much skint at the moment. I have no money. I applied for my student loan at the start of september due to the whole marriage thing that never happened.
Now, normally i could actually deal with this kind of stuff. I have a 1978 MGB GT V8 road/race car which occupied most of my time. Unfortunately, the car is in about 1000 bits at the moment.
The car, for the last 4 years at least, has basically been my identity.
It was my way of dealing with things... If I was happy i'd take it for a gentle burble around the lanes. If I was upset or had too much to deal with i'd plant my right foot and cane it.
With the race car in bits i'm forced to drive around in an Austin Metro.
I don't have a means of coping with things at the moment. Thrashing the tits off a 3.5 litre sports car made me feel alive! Mostly because on a few occasions she's tried to kill me. lol.
Theres been a lot going on in my life lately. This whole lack of a familiar coping mechanism is starting to get to me. Its clouding my judgement and i'm not handling situations right.
Not really much else to say. Just a rant really. Not really any specific questions to ask.... Not unless someone fancies loaning me about 12 grand so I can put the car back together.
What coping mechanisms do people use that are either
a) free
b) very cheap?
I recently separated from my fiance and got with a girl straight after whom I ended up falling for but that didnt work out either for various reasons so love life is pretty much zero.
I was originally taking a year off uni to get married and do the family thing. Since that part of my life didnt happen I managed to get myself back into uni but much of the course I am doing I'm really not interested in as a result.
I've made a few friends since I got back to uni - I joined the archery club. The whole things getting to be a little bit tedious though. Shoot for 2 hours then go down the pub.
I avoid going out to nightclubs because I'm pretty much skint at the moment. I have no money. I applied for my student loan at the start of september due to the whole marriage thing that never happened.
Now, normally i could actually deal with this kind of stuff. I have a 1978 MGB GT V8 road/race car which occupied most of my time. Unfortunately, the car is in about 1000 bits at the moment.
The car, for the last 4 years at least, has basically been my identity.
It was my way of dealing with things... If I was happy i'd take it for a gentle burble around the lanes. If I was upset or had too much to deal with i'd plant my right foot and cane it.
With the race car in bits i'm forced to drive around in an Austin Metro.
I don't have a means of coping with things at the moment. Thrashing the tits off a 3.5 litre sports car made me feel alive! Mostly because on a few occasions she's tried to kill me. lol.
Theres been a lot going on in my life lately. This whole lack of a familiar coping mechanism is starting to get to me. Its clouding my judgement and i'm not handling situations right.
Not really much else to say. Just a rant really. Not really any specific questions to ask.... Not unless someone fancies loaning me about 12 grand so I can put the car back together.
What coping mechanisms do people use that are either
a) free
b) very cheap?
Reply 1
i got an email from our SU about a go karting society that has been made this year... how about something like that? Even if it isn't through your university.....?
Thats about all i have to offer right now
Thats about all i have to offer right now
Reply 2
I really don't know what to say here. I can't decide whether you need H&R or the motor forum.
I'd start by suggesting you need to stop constructing an identity through your car. If you don't like archery, then stop; but make sure you try something else that involves people, socialising and fun.
I'd start by suggesting you need to stop constructing an identity through your car. If you don't like archery, then stop; but make sure you try something else that involves people, socialising and fun.
exercise! trust me, nothing and i mean NOTHING makes you feel as refreshed as almost killing yourself in the gym or running. the buzz you get off doing all that then having a shower and then sitting down resting is pretty ****ing hard to beat! in fact i still say its the best natural high you can get. its the double wammy of konwing youve done something good for yourself and also konwing that you have just pushed your physical and mental limits and are now relaxing. 
Reply 6
Why did you break up with your fiancee?
Reply 9
Dac_10
exercise! trust me, nothing and i mean NOTHING makes you feel as refreshed as almost killing yourself in the gym or running. the buzz you get off doing all that then having a shower and then sitting down resting is pretty ****ing hard to beat! in fact i still say its the best natural high you can get. its the double wammy of konwing youve done something good for yourself and also konwing that you have just pushed your physical and mental limits and are now relaxing.
Can't fault this.
A musical instrument is good fun, as well.
Or there's always the bottle
Thanks for the suggestions.
I may well look into joining a gym or going swimming etc.
I need something that I can do any time of the day or night that I can just go all out at untill I'm not thinking about what ever it was that annoyed / upset me.
Not really much of a physical person though... I suppose next stop is the fitness forum?
That'll be a job for monday. I drove through the night so I could play with muh V8 over the weekend.
I got it bad.
I may well look into joining a gym or going swimming etc.
I need something that I can do any time of the day or night that I can just go all out at untill I'm not thinking about what ever it was that annoyed / upset me.
Not really much of a physical person though... I suppose next stop is the fitness forum?
That'll be a job for monday. I drove through the night so I could play with muh V8 over the weekend.
I got it bad.
Reply 12
Do what I do, im so bored these days, if i sit around with only me and myself i feel ill go crazy so i just go to sleep.....
but na thats really not good advice at all, to be honest it is just becoming a really bad habit :P
I usually lift my spirits by doing something that puts me in another world, eg, reading, a movie or a video game.....that gets me away from the mundanity of my own lil world
but na thats really not good advice at all, to be honest it is just becoming a really bad habit :P
I usually lift my spirits by doing something that puts me in another world, eg, reading, a movie or a video game.....that gets me away from the mundanity of my own lil world
Jc, things aint good!
you could try what im doing, bring back select bits of yoru project to uni, and work on them in your room/house.
ive got the dashboard and all the gauges from my mini here so i can finish that, and have it ready just to bolt in.
try and do some small part every couple of weeks. if youve got the space, you could even get an engine stand and start the main enigne build away from the car.
Archery is cool, but i find it boring relatively quickly, and if i don't do too well, i get even more frustrated. i ride push bikes a lot- now i know your not he fittest person, but neither am i! but every little helps. going for a blast can be fun and exhilerating, either just to get fresh air, to try and do a certian route quicker than previously, or just going mad on yoru way to lectures dodging traffic!
most unis have a mountain bike club of some sort. some also have a motor club- that would certainly be worth you joining. when i was at southampton i did scatter and 12 car road rallies, and autotesting in an old 205, was such a great laugh, and the social scene is good.
The key is just to get out and do something constructive, even really concentrating on your studies is good- but it helps if you like the course, not sure if you genuinely don't like the course or are just feeling a bit "meh" due to whats happened.
always feel free to give me a buzz on msn dude, wot be around this weekend however- picking up my new car!
you could try what im doing, bring back select bits of yoru project to uni, and work on them in your room/house.
ive got the dashboard and all the gauges from my mini here so i can finish that, and have it ready just to bolt in.
try and do some small part every couple of weeks. if youve got the space, you could even get an engine stand and start the main enigne build away from the car.
Archery is cool, but i find it boring relatively quickly, and if i don't do too well, i get even more frustrated. i ride push bikes a lot- now i know your not he fittest person, but neither am i! but every little helps. going for a blast can be fun and exhilerating, either just to get fresh air, to try and do a certian route quicker than previously, or just going mad on yoru way to lectures dodging traffic!
most unis have a mountain bike club of some sort. some also have a motor club- that would certainly be worth you joining. when i was at southampton i did scatter and 12 car road rallies, and autotesting in an old 205, was such a great laugh, and the social scene is good.
The key is just to get out and do something constructive, even really concentrating on your studies is good- but it helps if you like the course, not sure if you genuinely don't like the course or are just feeling a bit "meh" due to whats happened.
always feel free to give me a buzz on msn dude, wot be around this weekend however- picking up my new car!
Reply 14
punch bag / circuit training / running.
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