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English Language Essay Watch

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    Hey, does anyone mind giving me a grade/score out of 8 for my language analysis from an extract from the woman in black?
    If so reply on this thread so I can upload the response
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    (Original post by CraigBackner)
    Hey, does anyone mind giving me a grade/score out of 8 for my language analysis for an extract?
    If so reply on this thread so I can upload the response
    I did English Language last year so won't be of too much help. PM me it anyway and I will try my best
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    (Original post by Baaah)
    I did English Language last year so won't be of too much help. PM me it anyway and I will try my best
    Okay thanks, this is the extract from the woman in black:

    I sat up paralyzed, frozen, in the bed, conscious only of the dog and of the prickling of my own skin and of what suddenly seemed a different kind of silence, ominous and dreadful. And then, from somewhere within the depths of the house—but somewhere not very far from the room in which I was—I heard a noise. It was a faint noise, and, strain my ears as I might, I could not make out exactly what it was. It was a sound like a regular yet intermittent bump or rumble. Nothing else happened. There were no footsteps, no creaking floorboards, the air was absolutely still, the wind did not moan through the casement. Only the muffled noise went on and the dog continued to stand, bristling at the door, now putting her nose to the gap at the bottom and snuffling along, now taking a pace backward, head cocked and, like me, listening, listening. And, every so often, she growled again.

    And heres my analysis for the question, How does the writer use language here to describe the atmosphere when Arthur Kipps wakes up?

    The writer uses convoluted long complex sentences to suggest the tense panic stricken atmosphere Arthur Kipps is in. This is evidently seen as Arthur wakes up 'paralysed','frozen in bed.. ominous and dreadful'. The writer has cleverly impacted the reader in such a way by dragging on thee rich imagerous sentence, overwhelming the reading, creating tension as if it's them experiencing it. Moreover, the adjectives 'paralysed', 'ominous' and 'dreadful' add to the tense atmosphere creating a vivid picture of Arthur in a frozen state.This is also reflected by the pathetic fallacy of the 'muffled noise', 'creaking floorboards' and the 'absolutely' still air. Subsequently, a mystical eerier atmosphere is induced suggested by the personification of the 'creaking' floorboards- as if something is about to happen.
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    (Original post by CraigBackner)
    Okay thanks, this is the extract from the woman in black:

    I sat up paralyzed, frozen, in the bed, conscious only of the dog and of the prickling of my own skin and of what suddenly seemed a different kind of silence, ominous and dreadful. And then, from somewhere within the depths of the house—but somewhere not very far from the room in which I was—I heard a noise. It was a faint noise, and, strain my ears as I might, I could not make out exactly what it was. It was a sound like a regular yet intermittent bump or rumble. Nothing else happened. There were no footsteps, no creaking floorboards, the air was absolutely still, the wind did not moan through the casement. Only the muffled noise went on and the dog continued to stand, bristling at the door, now putting her nose to the gap at the bottom and snuffling along, now taking a pace backward, head cocked and, like me, listening, listening. And, every so often, she growled again.

    And heres my analysis for the question, How does the writer use language here to describe the atmosphere when Arthur Kipps wakes up?

    The writer uses convoluted long complex sentences to suggest the tense panic stricken atmosphere Arthur Kipps is in. This is evidently seen as Arthur wakes up 'paralysed','frozen in bed.. ominous and dreadful'. The writer has cleverly impacted the reader n such a way by dragging on thee rich imagerous sentence, overwhelming the reading, creating tension as if it's them experiencing it. Moreover, the adjectives 'paralysed', 'ominous' and 'dreadful' add to the tense atmosphere creating a vivid picture of Arthur in a frozen state.This is also reflected by the pathetic fallacy of the 'muffled noise', 'creaking floorboards' and the 'absolutely' still air. Subsequently, a mystical eerier atmosphere is induced suggested by the personification of the 'creaking' floorboards- as if something is about to happen.
    Bear in mind that I have never read this book, but here is what I think of your analysis:
    - You repeated the quotes 'paralysed, ominous and dreadful' two times, there is no need for that. You could talk about ominous has connotations of danger, creating suspension for the readers.
    - You said that writer creates a stricken atmosphere by dragging on the rich imagery, but why is it overwhelming the reader and I don't think the words 'ominous' and 'dreadful' are imagery
    - You mentioned 'creating tension as if it's them experiencing it', which is good, but you need to go into more detail as to how the writer is creating this effect. Perhaps you could talk about the extract being in 1st person the use of sensory language like 'muffling' and 'creaking' allows the reader to understand the atmosphere?
    - I forgot what pathetic fallacy was, can you explain to me why 'absolutely' still air is considered one?
    - You mentioned something is about is about to happen - what is it? What can you tell me about the word 'creaking'?

    There might be more. Again, I dropped English so you might disagree with a lot of my gibberish
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    (Original post by Baaah)
    Bear in mind that I have never read this book, but here is what I think of your analysis:
    - You repeated the quotes 'paralysed, ominous and dreadful' two times, there is no need for that. You could talk about ominous has connotations of danger, creating suspension for the readers.
    - You said that writer creates a stricken atmosphere by dragging on the rich imagery, but why is it overwhelming the reader and I don't think the words 'ominous' and 'dreadful' are imagery
    - You mentioned 'creating tension as if it's them experiencing it', which is good, but you need to go into more detail as to how the writer is creating this effect. Perhaps you could talk about the extract being in 1st person the use of sensory language like 'muffling' and 'creaking' allows the reader to understand the atmosphere?
    - I forgot what pathetic fallacy was, can you explain to me why 'absolutely' still air is considered one?
    - You mentioned something is about is about to happen - what is it? What can you tell me about the word 'creaking'?

    There might be more. Again, I dropped English so you might disagree with a lot of my gibberish
    wow, no wonder I only got 5/8 about a B or 6 during my exam. Thanks for your input it really helped, especially because I got an English exam on Monday. I need to be more perceptive and explain my points in detail now!
 
 
 
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