Join TSR now for chat about life, relationships, fashion and more…Sign up now

How come so many girls are passive when it comes to suggesting things to do on dates? Watch

Announcements
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    I might be outgrowing the target audience in this forum as I'm into the 2nd half of my twenties now but hopefully the demographic I still relevant.

    I've found that dating girls in their 20s living in London, both British as well as European and even a few American, I've found that they almost never suggest things to do on dates.

    Even when I've known them for a while I still find that 90+% of the things I do on dates have been things I've suggested. Shows/restaurants I've booked, films that I've picked. Somehow the girls I've ended up dating (who have been quite a few) all seem to expect me as the guy to choose and organize all the activities we do together. There seems to be an almost complete lack of initiative on the girl's part to suggest activities.

    Is this just my experience or have other guys found this to be true as well?
    Girls who do not suggest things to do on dates, how come?
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    i think its because girls prefer it when the guy takes lead? i think even with history of old romance and dating- its the guys who decide- with the whole 'im picking you up at 7, be ready we're going out' kind of thing? it shows hes interested in spending time with you and wants to do things with you

    but then again i see from your POV how it can be annoying as you'd want her to feel comfortable on the date- especially when shes chosen the activity?

    idk like i sometimes pick what we're doing- its rather spontaneous about who does pick- if i want to do something i will tell him - he just goes with it haha

    i mean you could try by saying something to the effect that I really want to make this special do you have anything in mind? When they go anything you choose will be fine. Let them know emphatically that you want their input and you aren't taking no for an answer.

    it also depends on how confident she is around you too tbh- if she has the confidence to voice her opinion about it or say what she wants to do
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    Urgh it's annoying.

    I am yet to find a girl, outside of one specific example, who doesn't rely on the guy to organise a date 90% of the time. Which is really annoying when they say they don't want to do x, y or z.
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    **** knows im a girl myself and dont understand girls
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by DanB1991)
    Urgh it's annoying.

    I am yet to find a girl, outside of one specific example, who doesn't rely on the guy to organise a date 90% of the time. Which is really annoying when they say they don't want to do x, y or z.
    That's also annoying! You propose things to do but instead of hearing counter proposals, all you get is "no".
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by snakesnake)
    I might be outgrowing the target audience in this forum as I'm into the 2nd half of my twenties now but hopefully the demographic I still relevant.

    I've found that dating girls in their 20s living in London, both British as well as European and even a few American, I've found that they almost never suggest things to do on dates.

    Even when I've known them for a while I still find that 90+% of the things I do on dates have been things I've suggested. Shows/restaurants I've booked, films that I've picked. Somehow the girls I've ended up dating (who have been quite a few) all seem to expect me as the guy to choose and organize all the activities we do together. There seems to be an almost complete lack of initiative on the girl's part to suggest activities.

    Is this just my experience or have other guys found this to be true as well?
    Girls who do not suggest things to do on dates, how come?


    (Original post by CleverSquirrel)
    i think its because girls prefer it when the guy takes lead? i think even with history of old romance and dating- its the guys who decide- with the whole 'im picking you up at 7, be ready we're going out' kind of thing? it shows hes interested in spending time with you and wants to do things with you

    but then again i see from your POV how it can be annoying as you'd want her to feel comfortable on the date- especially when shes chosen the activity?

    idk like i sometimes pick what we're doing- its rather spontaneous about who does pick- if i want to do something i will tell him - he just goes with it haha

    i mean you could try by saying something to the effect that I really want to make this special do you have anything in mind? When they go anything you choose will be fine. Let them know emphatically that you want their input and you aren't taking no for an answer.

    it also depends on how confident she is around you too tbh- if she has the confidence to voice her opinion about it or say what she wants to do


    I deffo do not believe that men should take the lead - with my current partner I was the one who asked for his number first, made the first move for a kiss etc! However when it comes to dates, I am absolutely awful at making decisions. I'm not fussy about anything really; I enjoy most things, so I find it's easier to just get him to organise the date as I'm so indecisive! However reading these comments has got me thinking maybe he also finds it annoying that I leave it up to him :lol: I'll try make more decisions from now on I guess
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    lol basic *****es

    Literally takes minimal effort with Timeout London/ Trip Advisor etc.

    I have a ****ing bucket list prepared and I'm single AF

    Spoiler:
    Show



    1. Rooftop Cinema
    2. Circus
    3. Magic show
    4. Highgate Cemetery
    5. Kyoto Garden
    6. Everyman Cinema
    7. Oxo tower
    8. Stonehenge for summer solstice
    9. Cabaret show

    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    Girls tend to like it when a guy can just tell them when and where and not let them have to worry about anything. That's just the way it is.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    Maybe you haven't met anyone with an imagination. Or there just boring!!!. I always make the plans when I'm in a relationship. And tbh the blokes just go with what ever I wanna do.

    All the women I know are always dragging their partners to places. So I don't think all women leave it up to the men. In my experience men are rubbish at arranging things lol.




    Posted from TSR Mobile
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Redflag1)
    Maybe you haven't met anyone with an imagination. Or there just boring!!!. I always make the plans when I'm in a relationship. And tbh the blokes just go with what ever I wanna do.

    All the women I know are always dragging their partners to places. So I don't think all women leave it up to the men. In my experience men are rubbish at arranging things lol.




    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Seems like I've ended up dating girls from the very opposite end of the spectrum. I'd love to do stuff that a girl suggests as it could be something I never thought of. If we just do my suggestions, I end up doing things I'd have done anyway.
 
 
 
Write a reply… Reply
Submit reply
Updated: May 20, 2017
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Poll
Do you enjoy your job?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Quick reply
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.