someone please grade my romeo & juliet response Watch

eb00
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It's not finished but it would be really helpful to know the grade which i have achieved already.
The question is.. How does Shakespeare present Romeo as a passionate character.

Shakespeare presents Romeo as a passionate character in a number of different ways. In the extract it is shown when Romeo says 'O sweet Juliet, thy beauty hath made me effeminate' this quote highlights how Romeo has fallen involve with Juliet to a great extent due to 'O sweet Juliet, Shakespeare has used an extended metaphor to emphasise Juliet's beauty and how her beauty has made him change. However this quote has a double meaning, the adjective 'effeminate' also conveys the idea that Romeo is passionate as a lover that it makes him unmanly and changes; it also shows that Romeo is not so passionate about Juliet to a great extent as Romeo thinks that Juliet has prevented him from putting an end to Tybalt's aggressiveness. This highlights the fact that Romeo is not worried about being separated from Juliet when he decided to kill Tybalt, he issued his warning 'the Prince expressly hath/forbidden bandying in Verona' so Romeo knew what would happen but this also depicts the fact that Romeo is a loyal and passionate friend towards Mercutio as he does not care what the punishment will be for him, he seeks revenge. By this scene reaching high tension and close to its climax, Shakespeare had created drama so it meant that the Elizabethan audience would not loose focus as they usually would chat and do business during plays.

Throughout the whole text, Romeo is also shown as passionate. Romeo quotes 'it is the East, and Juliet is the sun' Romeo expresses this during his soliloquy. 'It is the East' suggests that he is looking eastwards and seeing Juliet would be seeing the sun coming up in the East. He is referring to her beauty as do passionate Romantics. 'Juliet is the sun' boosts the idea that he is passionate about Juliet and by using light imagery it conveys that Romeo could not live without her. For someone to say this in the Elizabethan era it was unusual, as people did not marry for love but would usually marry for social standing.
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C_Yap
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(Original post by eb00)
It's not finished but it would be really helpful to know the grade which i have achieved already.
The question is.. How does Shakespeare present Romeo as a passionate character.

Shakespeare presents Romeo as a passionate character in a number of different ways. In the extract it is shown when Romeo says 'O sweet Juliet, thy beauty hath made me effeminate' this quote highlights how Romeo has fallen involve with Juliet to a great extent due to 'O sweet Juliet, Shakespeare has used an extended metaphor to emphasise Juliet's beauty and how her beauty has made him change. However this quote has a double meaning, the adjective 'effeminate' also conveys the idea that Romeo is passionate as a lover that it makes him unmanly and changes; it also shows that Romeo is not so passionate about Juliet to a great extent as Romeo thinks that Juliet has prevented him from putting an end to Tybalt's aggressiveness. This highlights the fact that Romeo is not worried about being separated from Juliet when he decided to kill Tybalt, he issued his warning 'the Prince expressly hath/forbidden bandying in Verona' so Romeo knew what would happen but this also depicts the fact that Romeo is a loyal and passionate friend towards Mercutio as he does not care what the punishment will be for him, he seeks revenge. By this scene reaching high tension and close to its climax, Shakespeare had created drama so it meant that the Elizabethan audience would not loose focus as they usually would chat and do business during plays.

Throughout the whole text, Romeo is also shown as passionate. Romeo quotes 'it is the East, and Juliet is the sun' Romeo expresses this during his soliloquy. 'It is the East' suggests that he is looking eastwards and seeing Juliet would be seeing the sun coming up in the East. He is referring to her beauty as do passionate Romantics. 'Juliet is the sun' boosts the idea that he is passionate about Juliet and by using light imagery it conveys that Romeo could not live without her. For someone to say this in the Elizabethan era it was unusual, as people did not marry for love but would usually marry for social standing.
Oh wow, I did English Literature last year (A*), and I really like your analysis. Your embedded quotes are relevant and there's plenty of analysis for each. Although I didn't read Romeo And Juliet, I think the analysis is relevant to the question, because quite often people tend to lose focus. You have also mentioned language techniques and followed the PEEL structure really well.

I didn't do the new spec, but if this was used in the old spec, you would score quite high.
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eb00
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(Original post by Baaah)
Oh wow, I did English Literature last year (A*), and I really like your analysis. Your embedded quotes are relevant and there's plenty of analysis for each. Although I didn't read Romeo And Juliet, I think the analysis is relevant to the question, because quite often people tend to lose focus. You have also mentioned language techniques and followed the PEEL structure really well.

I didn't do the new spec, but if this was used in the old spec, you would score quite high.
Thank you! it's really hard not to blabber on to something off topic, especially when aiming for a high grade you have to analyse one quotation in depth.
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Mariah221101
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Brilliant thankyou x
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Goldenshark
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Very good response, if the rest of the essay was that standard then definately top band. Embedded quotes and context links are well interwoven and relevant. To really signpost for the examiner and ensure they give you the ticks in the right places then replace “double meaning” with “an alternative interpretation is”.
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